


Problem Child

by rivai-lution (stethoscopesandsigs)



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Anal Sex, Biting, First Time, Hand Jobs, M/M, Misgendering, More tags to be added, Rimming, Sad, There will be sex, Violence, mostly canon
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-03-23
Updated: 2015-12-27
Packaged: 2018-03-19 05:59:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 11
Words: 67,970
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3599022
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stethoscopesandsigs/pseuds/rivai-lution
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Years ago, Shinohara rescued a white-haired boy from the clutches of the ghoul, Big Madame. Though some saw him as a threat, Shinohara saw him as a victim, so he asked the CCG to take him in as they would any orphan. Now, that boy wants to become an investigator, and Shinohara is the only investigator suited to be his partner. Training this feral, white-haired boy will not be easy, but he never could have anticipated how it would change him. </p><p>An exploration of an alternative (read: gay af) interpretation of Shinohara and Juuzou's relationship. Mostly canon compliant for the big stuff, except Shinohara is gay and single. (NOTE: Despite the tags, this fic is primarily plot, with a lil bit of porn. Just fyi!)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Feral

**Author's Note:**

> Please note: This is a ShinoZou fic and there will be erotic/explicit material as it goes on. If you're going to be a dick about that, then don't read it. 
> 
> You can find me on Tumblr at [tinyghoulproblem](http://tinyghoulproblem.tumblr.com/). 
> 
> Enjoy!

Shinohara held up three fingers. Two. One. One quick flick of his wrist later, all hell broke loose.

There were explosions, screams, feet slapping against the ground. Shinohara pressed himself against the wall, two of his fellow CCG Investigators at his side. They knew their place in this operation; hang back until they were needed. Special class investigators were there to take on the most dangerous ghouls, involve themselves in the most dangerous conflicts. There was no sense in getting distracted with the lesser ghouls now. 

He heard a crash come from inside the arena, and a surge of adrenaline coursed through him. Shinohara steeled his nerves as he nodded to his men—they moved toward the door in tandem. He wasn’t sure what they could expect beyond that door, wasn’t sure what was going on in the great, dark room, but he prepared himself for the worst. They called him “indomitable”…if he was, it was because he never really expected to come back alive. Every mission began with two precepts in Shinohara’s mind: that he was a dead man, and that as such, there would be no sense in backing down from a fight, no matter the danger, no matter the cost. 

He breathed deeply. He set his jaw. He pushed through the doors.

He wasn’t expecting what came next, wasn’t expecting the child with the eyes as big as saucers, standing silent in the middle of the floor. A surge of concern ran through him. 

“Are you alright?” Shinohara called. Dust clouded the air between them. He took a step closer. “Are you hurt?”

The child giggled, then slumped to the floor. 

***

“Well, he’s certainly human,” Dr. Chigyou said, stripping the gloves from his hands. “I’ve administered a mild sedative to keep him calm for now.”

“His physical condition?” Shinohara asked, leaning forward in his chair to rest his elbows on his knees. 

“It’s…well. He’s been with the ghouls for a long time, now. Some of his scars are white with age. And he’s…it appears he’s been rather inexpertly castrated.”

Shinohara looked up sharply, eyes wide. “You mean he…?”

“I don’t know how it was done, but it was tremendously messy. What he has left isn’t…very functional. He’ll need surgery just to be able to urinate normally, and to fix some of the scar tissue. The injury doesn’t appear…recent. It’s probably been a few years, at least.”

Shinohara scrubbed a hand over his mouth, shook his head. “We’re considering him an orphan. There’s no record of a child matching his description going missing.”

“Rumor has it that there’s a burgeoning human trafficking trade surrounding these gourmet ‘restaurants.’” Dr. Chigyou nodded. “He was probably sold off awhile ago.”

“The CCG will take him in, then,” Shinohara nodded. “I wanted you to look at him first, just to be sure, but lets move him over to medical.”

Dr. Chigyou nodded, then pressed his lips together. “Shinohara…” he murmured, his voice low as if they were in danger of being overheard. “Tortured and raised by ghouls…he was an amusement for them, perhaps even a murderer. There’s no telling what he was doing in that place, or what’s going to happen when he wakes.”

Shinohara nodded. “He’s a human who’s lived through terrible trauma. He’s the responsibility of the CCG. And…” he stood, stretched, his limbs stiff with exhaustion. “If he wants revenge…he could be a useful ally.”

Dr. Chigyou smiled wearily. “Maybe someday he’ll come back to me for a quinque.”

Shinohara clapped him on the back, nodded. “Move him to medical. The rest will come in due time.”

***

Another two hours had passed before Shinohara made his way back to his apartment. He checked his watch, groaned. He’d have to be awake in just a few hours, ready for a desk full of paperwork and a comprehensive stream of meetings with his superiors. No rest for the weary. He unlocked the door, slipped inside, and tossed his keys in the dish by the door with a sigh. Sometimes, after a raid, they still had enough energy to go out for drinks afterward. Maybe some of the men had, but Shinohara had been preoccupied with the child. Contemplating what that boy had been through made something deep inside his guts twist up, ugly, angry. 

Years of work for the CCG had taught him two things about ghouls: that they were every bit as complex and varied as human beings, and that they were dangerous above all. Many of the investigators found solace in viewing their situation as black and white—ghouls were bad, the doves were their righteous enemies. Any and all measures necessary for ghoul extermination were necessary and, by necessity, morally sound. Shinohara took a different view. Their war, and it was a war, was fraught with the same complications that all wars held. Each side had its own view, but they would be locked in battle, each at an obligation to eliminate the other, until one side prevailed.

Still, when the doctor explained what had been done to the boy, Shinohara couldn’t help his anger, couldn’t reason it away. It bloomed dark and deep inside of him, rolling and ebbing like the tide. He had to calm it, somehow, before it kept him tossing and turning for what was left of the night. 

Resigned, he stepped into the shower, washing away the blood and grime, the layer of dried sweat and filth left on his body after the raid. Steam billowed around him as he scrubbed his skin pink, worked soap into the short strands of his hair. He was still breathing, and so was the child. As long as they still breathed, they could go on. 

***

“How is he?” Shinohara asked, walking up beside Dr. Ikeda in the medical ward. 

“Well,” the doctor pursed his lips, stopped walking. Shinohara stopped with him and leaned a bit closer. “He’s alive. It seems that his fainting was brought on by shock. But I can’t be sure how he’s going to fare in the long run. He’s…he’s clearly been tortured and put through tremendous trauma. When he woke earlier, he was so inconsolable that he had to be sedated almost immediately. We’re planning to keep him that way until after his surgery.”

Shinohara nodded. “Did he say anything?”

“He cried for ‘mama,’ but that was all.”

“Thanks, Dr. Ikeda,” Shinohara smiled. “You’re doing a good job. Let me know if anything else develops.”

“Of course,” the doctor agreed. “But Shinohara, what will become of him?”

“I imagine he’ll be sent to the school, then allowed to make his own decisions.”

“I don’t know if he’ll be capable of attending, much less making a decision.”

“Time is an incredible thing,” Shinohara replied, placing one strong hand on the doctor’s shoulder. “Let’s just see what happens, right?”

“Right,” the doctor replied, still dubious. “Well, we’ll be doing our best.”

“I expect nothing less,” Shinohara waved as he walked away. 

***

The boy’s surgery was a success, or as much of a success as it could have been. He put several of the nurses and other medical personnel in the hospital when he awoke, but he was able to be subdued with food—an ingenious idea from Dr. Ikeda. Eventually, he was deemed fit enough to leave the hospital wing, and was given a private room in the dorms of the CCG’s school. He was allowed to roam around the CCG’s grounds, but at first, he would barely leave his room. He ate ravenously and slept at least twenty hours a day. After a month had passed, he told Dr. Ikeda that his name was Rei. 

This information was covered in the memo sent out before the meeting; Shinohara was aware of the details. He’d taken an interest in Rei’s case, and intended to do what he could to help the boy. This apparent interest brought him to a room of senior staff and special class investigators, all of them set out to solve the problem of Rei. 

“His physical ability is amazing,” one of them piped up. “It’s like he was trained in a circus. I’ve never seen such flexibility and strength…like his whole body is made of springs.”

“He’d be on par with the first class investigators,” another said, nodding. “We should start him right awa-…”

“No,” a third broke in. “He’s dangerous. It’s impossible to keep track of the damage he’s caused in just a few weeks…not just to nurses and personnel, but to himself as well. He’s out of control, and that’s not going to change. The boy has no morals, and an investigator without morals…”

“He was raised by ghouls, wasn’t he?” Shinohara broke in, smiling gently. “I don’t think he was given a choice, was he?”

“Some of his scars are very old,” Dr. Ikeda confirmed. “It’s likely he was with them from the time he was a very young child, perhaps a toddler.”

“I think that means it’s our duty to care for him,” Shinohara continued. “He is a victim, isn’t he? A victim of the ghouls, just like so many of us.” 

“I suppose that’s true.” 

“In that case,” Shinohara continued, “Perhaps he should be admitted into the school.”

“But the instructors can’t control him, he’ll be a disruption.”

Shinohara shrugged. “Then lets just let him be. He’ll come of age in a few years, then he can decide for himself what he wants to do.”

Thus, it was decided. Rei was allowed to go to school, though, as Shinohara was informed, he never attended classes. As the years passed on, there were rumors about him, the CCG’s problem child. They said that he hurt animals—the first sign of true madness—but Shinohara wasn’t entirely sure. Given what he’d been through, he supposed that it could be true, but at the same time, things weren’t always what they seemed. Nevertheless, it disturbed him, left some niggling sense of doubt in his gut. What he’d done had been the right thing, rescuing the boy had been paramount, and he was, without a doubt, a victim. Even if he had hurt animals, he was still a human being. As long as he lived, there was hope for redemption. 

Three years after he’d rescued the child, he was called into the office of Yoshitoki Washuu, the bureau director of the CCG’s main office. Washuu was a good man, a good leader, always calm and collected, and a son of the famed Washuu clan—legendary exterminators of ghouls across the globe. He smiled as Shinohara opened the door, gestured for him to come in. 

“Shinohara, always good to see you. Tea?”

“Certainly, and likewise,” Shinohara replied with a smile. Washuu pulled a cup out from his desk and filled it from a still-steaming pot. Shinohara nodded his thanks as he accepted the cup, sipping at it gingerly. The tea was hot, but good. Shinohara always accepted tea when it was offered by his superiors—it was, after all, very good tea. 

“What can I do for you, director?” he asked, setting his cup on the edge of the desk. 

“It’s Suzuya Rei, the so-called Problem Child of the CCG.”

“Is there a problem?” Shinohara asked, brows furrowed. 

“Nothing outside the ordinary,” Washuu replied with a soft smile. “But he’s elected to become an investigator.”

Shinohara saw the play, and he approved of it. They wanted him to pair with Rei. Frankly, he wasn’t sure if anyone else could. Or would, truth be told. 

“The chairman has asked that you be assigned to him. You’ll vacate your position as instructor and return to the field.”

“Of course,” Shinohara nodded. 

“He has tremendous potential,” Washuu said. “The chairman and I both think you’re the one who can bring it out of him. Don’t consider your duties as an instructor to end entirely. He has never attended his classes at the academy, despite being enrolled. He will need guidance, time, and patience. And he will be your responsibility.”

“I understand,” Shinohara replied, sipping at his tea.

“Of course,” Washuu continued. “The time commitment will be above average, as you will be responsible for his education as well as his work in the field. It is fortunate that you’ve elected to remain single, Shinohara. I’m not sure that any other investigators would have the resources for this assignment.”

“Thank you for considering me an appropriate match,” Shinohara said.

Washuu stood, and so did Shinohara. The meeting was coming to a close. “You’ll find him down at the school.”

With a smile, Shinohara replied, “He’s not too hard to find.”

“One last thing,” Washuu caught Shinohara just as he was turning to go. “We’ve asked him to choose a new name.”

“What did he choose?” 

“Why don’t you ask him?”

***

“Hello,” Shinohara said, holding his hand out to the white-haired boy before him. He’d finally found Rei underneath a tree in the garden, smashing ants in his fingers. He looked up at Shinohara with enormous, round eyes, the dappled light glowing on his pale skin. He had stitches all over his neck and arms, beneath his lip, and even under one eye. Shinohara wondered how they’d gotten there, but he didn’t stare at them. “I’m Shinohara Yukinori, and I’ll be your new partner.”

“I’m Suzuya Juuzou,” he replied, fitting his small, stitched hand in Shinohara’s own. Shinohara shook his hand, and was surprised that such a small, soft thing could have such a grip. He smiled. Juuzou smiled back. 

“Say, do you have a suit?” Shinohara asked, letting go of Juuzou’s hand. Juuzou wrinkled his nose, and Shinohara laughed. “Perhaps you can have one of mine. It’ll be much too big, but we can make do.”

“Do I have to wear it?”

“Well,” Shinohara shrugged, “Everyone does. We’re supposed to look like government agents, you know? Official. It helps people trust us.”

“I really don’t care if anyone trusts me,” Juuzou replied. 

“Even so, it’s important that they do.”

Juuzou huffed. 

“Also, someone told me that you’re not going to be able to stay in the dorms much longer, now that you’re a real investigator. Have you found another place to live?”

Juuzou shuffled his feet, looked off across the grounds. He was flighty, almost feral, his posture seemingly relaxed, but ready to run off at a moment’s notice. Like a wild cat, he drew close, but was never far from running away on soft, quick feet. Shinohara had heard some of the other students refer to him as “empty,” and to an extent, he felt that the description fit. It was impossible to tell what he was thinking, feeling. Time alone had not served to bring out his humanity as Shinohara had hoped…no, it would require more than that. 

“That’s alright,” Shinohara continued, a smile on his lips. “I have a spare room at my place. You can stay there until we’ve found you a place of your own.”

Juuzou turned, wide eyes fixed on Shinohara’s left shoulder. “Don’t you have a family like the other instructors?”

“Nope,” Shinohara replied. “I used to have a room mate, but they left. Now it’s just me, so you can have the room to yourself.”

Juuzou fidgeted, his eyes scanning around again. “Okay,” he said simply, softly. 

“Okay,” Shinohara echoed. “Let’s go then. I’ll see if I can find you a suit.”

***

His apartment wasn’t very far from headquarters, and Shinohara thought it better to avoid the press of the train until he had a better handle for how Juuzou acted outside of the school. So they walked instead, Juuzou pressing unexpectedly close to Shinohara, looking wide-eyed at the world around them. Eventually, they arrived, and Shinohara unlocked the door and tossed his keys in the dish, just as he had always done. 

Juuzou skirted inside, kicked off his slippers, and poked into the front room cautiously, as if expecting something to jump out at him. 

“Here,” Shinohara said, walking ahead of him, showing him that it was safe, “Let me show you where you’ll be staying.”

The room wasn’t much, holding just a bed, bedside table with a lamp, and a small closet. “I have it furnished just in case, so you don’t have to worry about that. We’ll have your stuff brought over whenever you want.”

“Yeah, okay,” Juuzou replied absently, fingers resting lightly on the lamp shade. He walked to each corner of the room, inspecting it for something, though Shinohara couldn’t imagine what. At last he sighed, shoved his hands down into his pockets, and nodded. “It’s good.”

“Glad you approve,” Shinohara smiled. “Now, lets see about that suit.”

“Mmm…” Juuzou hummed softly, “Maybe it would be better to see about some lunch.”

“Suit first,” Shinohara replied, “Then lunch, I promise.” He remembered what the doctors had told him about plying the boy with food. Some things never changed. 

He dug through his closet until he found an older suit of his. It was too small for him now, but as Juuzou slipped his arms into the jacket, it still hung enormous. Shinohara chuckled as he surveyed the boy, shifting around and frowning. 

“Let me roll the sleeves up. Maybe that will help.”

“I doubt it,” Juuzou muttered. However, with the sleeves rolled up, Juuzou could at least move his hands about freely. “Okay, lunch,” he declared. “You promised.”

“That I did,” Shinohara smiled, and off they went. 

They walked down the street to a noodle shop that Shinohara frequented. Juuzou stared at the menu for less than three seconds before he slapped it down, declared that he knew what he wanted, and started spinning his chopsticks in his hands. They ordered, and as they waited for their food, Juuzou turned to Shinohara and asked, “When do I get a quinque?”

Shinohara laughed, surprised. “Not…not for awhile. You never went to classes, remember?”

“Yeah,” Juuzou replied, rolling his eyes. “It was boring.”

“But you never went.”

“I could tell.”

“Even so, you have a lot to learn before you’re allowed a quinque of your own. And…you have to kill a ghoul, so that we can use it’s body to make your quinque.”

“Aren’t there extras?” Juuzou asked, “Just until I kill one?”

“Yeah,” Shinohara shrugged, “But they usually get passed down from one investigator to another. You have to prove that you know enough about them before you’re allowed to use one.” 

“That’s stupid,” Juuzou declared. “I know how to kill ghouls, and I know how to use weapons. Why do I need to know anything else?”

“There are rules,” Shinohara explained, “As an investigator, you have to know what they are if you want to to be given privileges.”

“A quinque is a privilege?” Juuzou asked. 

“Yep. A privilege is a special resposibility you’re given for proving yourself. When you prove yourself, you’ll be given a quinque. When you’re ready.”

Their noodles came out, and they tucked in, the conversation of the quinque dissipating into silence as they ate. When they were done, Shinohara paid, Juuzou eyeing his money with no small amount of interest.

“Hey, do I get a salary now?” Juuzou asked.

“Yep,” Shinohara replied, sliding into his jacket. “You’ll get some now, but if you work hard, you’ll get a better one when you’re promoted.”

“I bet you get a big salary,” Juuzou went on, walking right at Shinohara’s side as they left the restaurant. “Aren’t you special class?”

“That’s right,” Shinohara smiled, lifting his face to the sun. It was a beautiful day, a light breeze blowing through the city, the sun warm. He enjoyed teaching like this, one on one. 

“Why?”

“I worked hard,” Shinohara replied. “And I had a lot of good teachers.”

“And you killed a lot of ghouls.”

“Yeah, quite a few.”

“Was it fun?”

“No…not really fun. It was scary, sometimes, and I had to see a lot of my friends die. But it’s my job.”

“Why do you do it if it isn’t fun? I hate doing jobs.”

Shinohara looked down at the top of Juuzou’s head, bobbing brilliantly white in the sunlight as he walked. “Well, some jobs are better than others. But I’m an investigator because I want to help people. Ghouls kill humans, that’s their function. A normal person should never have to fear for their life because of ghouls, so that’s why I joined the CCG. To help keep people safe.”

“Dying is just another thing to do,” Juuzou shrugged. “I wanna kill ghouls because it’s fun.”

“We all have our reasons,” Shinohara reached for something else to say, but came up short. He was going to have to get used to Juuzou’s way of seeing things. In a way, it reminded him of Mado, and of so many others he’d known in the CCG. None of them really got through without some type of profound loss. It was part and parcel to the job, but some experienced more than others. Shinohara had lost colleagues and students, but never someone that he loved. The pain of it…he had seen it in the way Mado walked, in the way his eyes gleamed when he laid his hands on his latest quinque innovations, in his glee at exterminating ghouls. Grief wasn’t a thing of beauty or wonder, it was knife-sharp, cleaving flesh until just the barest bones remained. It hung onto Mado like a dark cloud, but Juuzou was different. His grief crept around the edges, hidden behind wide eyes and smiles. The empty child, except he was a child no longer, regardless of appearances. 

“When do we get to kill ghouls?”

“We’re investigators, Juuzou,” Shinohara reminded him, pulling away from his thoughts. “We’ll be given an assignment tomorrow. If we come up against a ghoul, you’re to leave it to me, alright?”

Juuzou frowned. 

“Just until you’ve gotten some training, alright?”

“I guess,” Juuzou shrugged. “Lets start training right away, okay?”

“Tomorrow,” Shinohara repeated. 

***

“First case! First case!” Juuzou yelled, running ahead of Shinohara and through the doors of the CCG. Shinohara scratched the back of his neck and sighed. It was good to see that Juuzou was excited, though what that excitement would bring, only time could tell. He’d stayed in his room for the first time the night before, or at least, he’d been meant to. Shinohara had been woken up a few times by sounds in the apartment, but he’d not bothered to go and see what they were. Juuzou was still skittish, and Shinohara didn’t want to startle him in the middle of the night. Besides, he figured that whatever he was doing, it wasn’t that big of a deal. At least, he hoped that it wasn’t. Nothing had seemed out of place this morning, so his gamble appeared to have payed off. Starting with a new partner was always an exercise in cohabitation—they shared so much time, energy, effort—but actually living in the same quarters wasn’t something that Shinohara had experienced since his academy days. 

Juuzou sped past the RC detectors, his badge flapping in his hand, Shinohara’s too-large jacket and pants swallowing his small frame as he ran. He had the pants rolled up, slender calves flashing almost as white as his hair. He looked like anything but an investigator, truth be told, but Shinohara comforted himself with the fact that he had at least tried. Forming Juuzou into a proper investigator was going to take time. 

Fifty feet ahead, Juuzou jumped up onto a bench, launched himself off of it with a flip, and rolled across the ground before springing up, hands in the air like an acrobat. Shinohara just smiled. 

A few minutes later, they stood in Shinohara’s office, looking over the paperwork on his desk. 

“Well,” Shinohara said, crossing his arms, “It looks like we’re just going to be on the beat.”

“What’s a beat?” Juuzou asked, nose wrinkled. 

“That means we walk around, observe, and see what happens.”

“That sounds boring.”

“Sometimes it is,” Shinohara admitted, “But it’s part of what we do as investigators.”

Juuzou sighed and slumped into Shinohara’s desk chair, then began spinning around in it. 

“Do I get a weapon?”

“Not yet…for now, you’re just observing. It’s unlikely that we’ll encounter any ghouls today, but if we do, you should just hang back and let me handle it, like I said…okay?”

Juuzou didn’t reply, just jumped off the still-spinning chair and made for the door, calling, “Let’s go!”

Shinohara followed behind. 

For hours, nothing really happened. They walked down their assigned streets, with Juuzou generally running about and Shinohara following behind at something of a distance. He wasn’t in any rush, and anyway, he liked to take time to interview the passers-by. He’d start the conversation gently enough with a simple, “Beautiful day, isn’t it?” Most would simply smile and continue on their way, but some would nod or say something back. Those were the ones Shinohara would question, though it was more conversational than an interrogation. 

“How have things been lately?” he would ask, or, “Anything you think I should know?

The silver briefcase and trenchcoat gave him away—the people of Tokyo knew a dove when they spotted one. Sometimes, this sort of questioning alerted a careful observer to vital clues for larger investigations, but for the most part, it was fairly inefficient. He wished that Juuzou would stay closer, learn how to talk to people, but perhaps that could come with time. He was still getting used to walking around in the outside world, so finer lessons on how to interact with others could wait. 

At some point, he realized that he hadn’t seen Juuzou in at least ten minutes. Something clenched nervously in his chest, and he frowned. His steps quickened, and he called out Juuzou’s name once, then again.

Laughter floated past him on the breeze.

“Juuzou?” He called again, trying to figure out the origin of the laughter. No answer. Something crashed. Shinohara began to run. 

He called for Juuzou again, but this time he heard it, “Mr. Shinohara! I’m here!” 

Heart pounding, he followed Juuzou’s voice, the crashes getting louder. Glass broke, and Shinohara started to run. He rounded a corner and found himself staring down an alley, his eyes landing first on Juuzou, who was hurtling his body through the air, catapulting off of dumpsters and fire escape ladders, laughing his head off, while a ghoul stabbed at him uselessly with its koukaku kagune. Shinohara had his quinque out in moments, Juuzou’s gleeful greeting lost in a haze of muscle memory; he’d done this so many times, and with so much at stake. This ghoul couldn’t be more than a class A, maybe less. But Juuzou was unarmed, and Shinohara would be damned if anything happened to him.

The ghoul shifted its focus as Shinohara came charging at it—it was older, perhaps in its mid-thirties, and male. Shinohara brought his quinque down on the ghoul’s Kagune and sliced it clean through. It was no match for him. The ghoul howled, its body trying to regenerate as it turned to run, but Shinohara wasted no time, sliced it straight down its back. It fell to the ground, dead. 

Shinohara breathed, his heart pounding deep in his chest. 

“Woohoo!” Juuzou yelled, springing off of the ladder and landing on the ghoul’s head. “Die!”

“Juuz-…” Shinohara started, but it was too late. Juuzou was jumping up and down on the ghoul’s head, smashing it like an over-ripe pumpkin, grey matter, blood, and viscera splashing out from it. Shinohara felt a wave of nausea overtake him, Juuzou’s cries of, “Die, die die!” ringing down the alleyway. 

“Juuzou!” he finally found the presence of mind to yell. When Juuzou didn’t react, he reached forward, grabbed his suspenders, and yanked him back. Juuzou looked up at him, eyes wide and bloodshot, brows raised in shock. 

“Mr. Shinohara?” he said the name as if it were a question. Shinohara was having trouble trying to speak, his breath still coming in gasps. 

“Enough,” he finally gasped out, “That’s enough, Juuzou.”

Juuzou frowned back at him and wiped one slender arm across his sweating forehead. 

“That’s enough.”

***

They called the bureau investigators to come clean up the mess, and as they waited, Juuzou kept climbing up the fire escapes, higher and higher. Shinohara didn’t try to stop him; perhaps it was better this way. Juuzou was talking to himself, his voice punctuated by giggles, filling the silence. Shinohara just breathed. He’d never seen a human move like that. 

They’d told him that Juuzou moved like someone trained at the circus, but this was the first time he’d seen it for himself. It was incredible, truly, but the sheer violence of his reaction to the ghoul…it had been dead, Shinohara was sure of it, but Juuzou still crushed its head like that, a completely unnecessary show of violence. 

The smell of blood was making him vaguely ill. 

“Rei!” he heard Juuzou yell above him. Problem child indeed. 

The bureau investigators arrived presently, and Shinohara found himself lying…or tweaking the truth, really, to cover for his partner’s actions.    
“It happened fast,” he said, scratching the back of his head. “I slashed its back, but it didn’t die. My partner is unarmed, so he did what he had to do.”

Juuzou was at least fifty feet above them, hanging upside down from the ladder by one foot. The investigators looked at him, then looked at Shinohara. “That’s your partner?”

“Yeah,” Shinohara shrugged. “He’s…in training.”

“Why doesn’t he have a quinque?” One of them asked, staring up at Juuzou’s white hair dubiously. 

“Well, he’s a special case. The chairman wanted him to learn on the job.” Shinohara didn’t care to answer any further questions, so he just smiled and slapped one of the investigators on the back. “I’m sure you guys can handle this. We’re going to go file the paperwork.”

The investigators shrugged and began setting up their tarps, hiding the ghoul’s body from the view of any passers by. Shinohara called up to Juuzou, told him to come down. Juuzou scampered down the ladder, flipped off of the last rung, and landed on his feet. 

“Let’s go!” he yelled, bouncing off down the alley. Shinohara followed. 

“Your feet,” Shinohara said, nodding down at Juuzou, “They…we should stop by the apartment so you can clean up.”

“Yeah,” Juuzou agreed, “They’re sticky.” 

In truth, he had blood up to his ankles, bits and pieces of brain and skull still clinging to his skin. Shinohara was done feeling sick about it…he’d learned a long time ago to accept the things that he saw. Being an investigator was violent work, but he’d always done his best to follow Article 13, Clause 2…not to cause more suffering than necessary. Technically, the ghoul that Juuzou had been fighting hadn’t been caused any additional suffering. He was dead when he fell, and if he wasn’t, Juuzou’s feet would have crushed his brain stem immediately. It wasn’t that the ghoul suffered, but rather the sheer violence of Juuzou’s actions that had bothered Shinohara. He contemplated Juuzou’s laughter, the way he climbed up so high, babbling to himself. There was something to this, he could feel it. He would have to keep observing the boy. 

“Can I ask you something?” 

Juuzou looked up at him and nodded. 

“How did you find that ghoul? It’s unusual for one to show itself in broad daylight.”

“He found me,” Juuzou replied in a sing-song tone. And then, “I smell good. Ghouls like me.”

“Where did he find you?”

“He was following me…so I went into the alley, and he followed me.”

“You weren’t afraid?”

“It was fun!” Juuzou stuffed his hands down into his pockets, lifted his nose in the air. “Mr. Shinohara, I’m hungry.”

“I bet,” Shinohara replied. He didn’t feel like eating, but Juuzou was so unfazed by the whole thing, and he’d used a lot of energy in that fight. “Let’s get you cleaned up, then we’ll eat. Then you get to learn about paperwork.” 

***

Compared to the events of the morning, the rest of the day was rather dull. Even trying to explain the mess to his division leader seemed simple, monotonous. Juuzou, exhausted, napped on a chair in Shinohara’s office, curled up like a cat underneath his oversized jacket. With his white hair and pale skin, he looked practically angelic when he slept. Shinohara kept looking over at him as he wrote up his report, in fact, he found it difficult to look away. With a weapon, Juuzou would have a nearly unprecedented capacity for killing. There had been another, before…Shinohara thought about him, the prodigy, the angel of death - Arima. Together, he and Juuzou would be a force unto themselves. 

It wasn’t such a bad idea, Shinohara thought. Juuzou needed a bit of time, a bit of training, but he didn’t seem to stick close to Shinohara during investigations, and his proclivity toward harming other humans was troubling at best. Maybe working away from other people, under Shinohara’s watchful eye, would do them both some good. Shinohara tucked the thought away, promising himself that he would examine it in more detail later. Still, his eyes lingered on Juuzou’s long eyelashes, on the way his mouth moved while he slept. He must have been dreaming. 

Eventually, the paperwork was finished, and Shinohara left Juuzou sleeping in the chair, muttering softly in his sleep. He dropped the report off at the desk, and walked down the hall until he reached a nondescript door with a card scanner. With a swipe of his ID, something inside the door clicked, and Shinohara stepped inside. An old man sat behind a simple desk, tinkering with something that looked like a stiletto knife. Shinohara knew that it was a small quinque, but the untrained eye wouldn’t have known the difference. For all of the flash of his own quinques, these were the type be appreciated most. He’d learned on one that was similar, back in his academy days. Now, he had an idea. 

“Shinohara!” the old man exclaimed, looking up at him with a smile, a monocle fixed in one eye. “How can I help you?”

“Afternoon, Masao,” Shinohara smiled back, looked around. “I’m in need of a small quinque…bikaku type, if you can.”

“Oh?” Masao raised a brow and removed his monocle. “Nostalgia?”

“No,” Shinohara laughed softly. “I’m training a new investigator. He’s never carried a quinque before, and I want him to have something to defend himself…just in case.” 

“Ah,” the old man thought to himself for a moment, frowning. “Well, I might have just the thing. Wait here.”

When Masao placed the small knife in his hand minutes later, Shinohara smiled. 

“Perfect.”

***

It was rare that Shinohara awoke in the night. Generally, he slept like a log, and the lovers he’d had over the years had often chided him for his snoring. He’d even worn nose strips for awhile, but had fallen out of the habit in recent years. Living alone meant that there was no one else around to disturb. 

But he wasn’t alone now, temporary though this arrangement may have been, and somehow, he must have been subconsciously aware of Juuzou’s presence in the apartment. He looked over at the clock, groaning at the number that shone back at him through the darkness. Another sound came from the living room. With a deep sigh, he pushed himself up and made his way through the darkness, pulling his robe on over his bare torso and loose-fitting pajama pants. 

“Juuzou?” he croaked out into the darkness. His mouth felt parched. “It’s just me.” 

No response came, aside from a quiet shuddering sound he couldn’t place. He padded out toward the couch on great bare feet, his eyes finding Juuzou’s silhouette curled up there, bathed in moonlight. He was pressed into the corner of the couch, his small form folded in on itself so tightly that he seemed even smaller than usual, his face shielded by tendrils of white hair, his whole body shivering. 

“Juuzou…” Shinohara whispered, hoping for some response, but the boy didn’t move, just stayed there, all curled up and shaking. Shinohara had a thought, but it was risky…Juuzou was unpredictable and violent. Despite the hundred pound size difference between them, Shinohara was sure that Juuzou could do him some serious damage, particularly if he was caught unaware. 

A strange, strangled sob ripped out from Juuzou’s throat, and Shinohara decided that even if it was dangerous, it was worth it. He sat next to Juuzou on the couch. There was a soft throw that hung on the back of the couch—Shinohara pulled it around Juuzou, wrapping it tightly. Then, he began to rub his hand down Juuzou’s back in slow, rhythmic motions. 

Gradually, the shivering stopped, the periodic sobs coming further apart, and then not at all. Shinohara moved close to Juuzou and, as best he could, wrapped his arms around him. Eventually, Juuzou’s breathing had evened out, breath going slow and rhythmic. Shinohara disentangled himself from around that slight form and crawled back into bed. An hour had passed, but he didn’t mind. He wondered if anyone had ever held Juuzou until he fell asleep. The thought chased him into his dreams.


	2. Hunting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Now, Juuzou was back in the oversized coat, sleeves rolled up to his elbows, pant legs leaving his slender calves exposed. He ran ahead, disappearing here and there and then slinking back. Shinohara tried not to be overly suspicious of whatever he was doing, chose instead just to keep walking. They reached the tunnel that lead to the 24th ward, and Shinohara swiped his keycard for access. The light on the card reader turned green, and the two of them entered, Juuzou bounding down the stairs two at a time. At the bottom, Arima awaited them, dressed in his long pale trench coat, his black and gold quinque case at his side. 
> 
> Juuzou jumped off of the third-to-last step, landing on two feet directly before him, and looked up slowly. “You’re tall!” he exclaimed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! Thank you for all of your kind comments!!! 
> 
> I know that I said this would be a three-parter. I was wrong. It's going to be quite a bit longer. Also, I'm back in school now, and updates may be slow for a bit. Please bear with me! I've never abandoned a fic and I don't intend to now. 
> 
> ALSO, I made an 8tracks mix for the fic! You can find it [here](http://8tracks.com/rivai-lution/problem-child-a-shinohara-juuzou-mix).
> 
> Kudos and comments are so, so deeply appreciated. Please enjoy!

“What is this tiny thing?” Juuzou asked, looking down at the little scorpion knife, eyes wide. 

“It’s your quinque,” Shinohara replied. “It’s called ‘Scorpion,’ and it’s yours to defend others.” 

“This isn’t quite what I had in mind…” Juuzou replied dubiously, picking the quinque up by the handle and dangling it from his fingertips. 

“I thought you were quite good with knives,” Shinohara smiled. “I saw you flipping the kitchen knife around this morning…”

“Yeah, but,” Juuzou frowned. “It’s so small, Mr. Shinohara.” 

“You’re pretty small too, but you can do a lot of damage.” 

Juuzou contemplated that for a moment, then wrinkled up his nose. “Who am I supposed to defend? I thought my job was just to kill ghouls.”

“That’s a part of your job,” Shinohara said, nodding his head down the road as he began walking away. It was their third day on the beat, and so far, all was calm. The previous day had been quiet as well, but Shinohara didn’t want to wait for Juuzou to get himself in a another bind. He figured now was as good a time as any to give Juuzou the Scorpion. He simply hoped that it was the right move. “But you’re also meant to protect the humans around you. After all, we don’t kill the ghouls just because we want to kill something, do we? It’s about protecting the people in this place from creatures who want to hurt them.”

Juuzou trotted up next to him, the knife nowhere in sight. He was quiet for awhile, his shoulder brushing Shinohara’s arm as he walked, close as always until he wasn’t. Shinohara was glad that, for now, he was sticking close. 

“Now that you have a weapon,” he started, “What would you think about doing some training?”

“Isn’t this training?” Juuzou asked, distracted by a candy store they were passing.

“Yes, but I have something else in mind.”

“Like what?”

“Have you heard of the 24th ward?”

“Ummm…” Juuzou didn’t sound very interested, and Shinohara knew that he had no clue what the 24th ward was. If he knew, he’d have been begging to go there from the start. 

“Here, let me give you a lesson in geography.” Shinohara steered him toward a corner store where he picked out a map of Tokyo. As he went up to the counter, Juuzou slipped up ahead of him and emptied a handful of candies onto the counter. 

“And these too, please!”

Shinohara didn’t argue. He needed to bribe him to pay attention to the map somehow. He paid and they left, walking until they found a bench where they could sit. 

Juuzou set about to unwrapping his candy, and Shinohara drew lines on the map, frowning a bit as he tried to remember the exact streets that served as demarcation between the wards. 

“Okay,” he started, pointing to the first ward. “This is where we are. It’s the first ward, and the headquarters of the CCG.”

Juuzou nodded, so he continued to point out each ward in turn, describing the main ghouls of each ward and where the CCG satellite offices were in each. Juuzou’s eyes started to go glassy, and Shinohara stole one of his gummybears. 

“Hey!” Juuzou cried, frowning. 

“Just making sure you’re still paying attention. Now, Juuzou, tell me…where’s the 24th ward?”

“I…” he started, frowning down at the map. “Hey, you didn’t tell me!”

“That’s right. That’s because you wont find it on the map. The 24th ward is underneath us right now.”

“Underground?” Juuzou asked, looking down at the cement reflexively, as if he could see through it. “What’s there?”

“Whole nests of ghouls,” Shinohara replied. “And Arima’s squad.”

“I’ve heard of him,” Juuzou’s face broke into a grin. “They said he’s like a god.” 

“Yeah, he’s something else alright,” Shinohara nodded. “He advanced faster than any other agent. And he’s…well, he’s very good.” 

Juuzou frowned, then examined the chipped red polish on his nails. “So we just….go down there? And kill ghouls?”

Shinohara nodded. “When a promising young investigator comes up through the ranks, taking him down to the 24th ward is part of the training. Even though you came through the back door, your physical aptitude is equal to at least a first-class investigator. I think you could handle it. What do you think?”

Juuzou ran his unstitched finger over the stitches in his opposite arm, and chewed at his lip. Shinohara wasn’t sure why he was hesitating, and he almost asked, but Juuzou finally lifted his head and nodded. “Yeah, okay!”

Shinohara smiled. “I’ll see if I can get approval.”

“When do we go?” 

“Well…as soon as we can.”

***

A week later, they were walking to the entrance of the 24th ward. Several times, Shinohara had thought to himself that they ought to go hunting for Juuzou’s apartment, but there was a part of him that was enjoying the company, and Juuzou certainly wasn’t pressing for a change. They ate together, they investigated together, and in the evenings, they watched TV over boxes of takeout. Over the weekend, when things were less hectic, Shinohara had taken it upon himself to cook for Juuzou. He’d always enjoyed cooking, but it was difficult when he didn’t have anyone else to cook for. He always wound up with more food than he needed, and there was something pointless about it all. 

When Juuzou tucked in to curry with rice or fluffy pancakes, his eyes grew wide and a grin overtook his lips. It was satisfying.

On their work days, Shinohara had been filling out more paperwork than ever before. Juuzou truly did seem to attract ghouls, and they’d managed to exterminate another one before the weeks end. Shinohara had insisted that Juuzou let him do the work of it, pouting and protestations aside. On one unfortunate occasion, Juuzou had broken a boy’s hand for looking at him in such a way. Shinohara scolded him, but Juuzou’s eyes had glazed over, his gaze wandering until Shinohara sighed and gave it up. 

On Monday, they’d gotten word that they would be going to the 24th ward, so they began training in the special gyms at the CCG. Juuzou loved this, flipping and spinning and flying through the air so fast that he appeared superhuman, a demon ripped from a fever dream. The previous night, Shinohara had been so exhausted from the training that he’d dropped into a dead sleep on the couch, the TV bathing the room in flickering light. When he’d woken up, Juuzou had been curled atop him like a cat. Unwilling to unsettle him, Shinohara had let himself slip back into sleep, lulled by the low sound of Juuzou’s breathing. 

When he awoke in the morning, Juuzou was gone, back in his own bed. Shinohara decided not to mention it. 

Now, Juuzou was back in the oversized coat, sleeves rolled up to his elbows, pant legs leaving his slender calves exposed. He ran ahead, disappearing here and there and then slinking back. Shinohara tried not to be overly suspicious of whatever he was doing, chose instead just to keep walking. They reached the tunnel that lead to the 24th ward, and Shinohara swiped his keycard for access. The light on the card reader turned green, and the two of them entered, Juuzou bounding down the stairs two at a time. At the bottom, Arima awaited them, dressed in his long pale trench coat, his black and gold quinque case at his side. 

Juuzou jumped off of the third-to-last step, landing on two feet directly before him, and looked up slowly. “You’re tall!” he exclaimed.

“Hello,” Arima replied softly, eyes taking Juuzou in. If he was put off by Juuzou’s sloppy appearance or forward greeting, he didn’t show it. 

“Arima!” Shinohara greeted him with a wave. “Good to see you again.”

“I see you’ve brought our newest investigator,” Arima replied, lips pulling upward just a hair. Shinohara nodded. 

“This is my partner, Suzuya Juuzou. I’m sure the director told you we were coming.”

“He did,” Arima replied. Then, turning to Juuzou, he said, “I trust you have a weapon of some sort?”

With a quick movement, Juuzou produced his Scorpion and grinned. “It’s small,” he offered, frowning. “What’s in your case?”

“I’m sure you’ll see it soon enough,” Arima replied. “But I’m interested to see what you can do with that.”

Juuzou flipped the knife and it disappeared, his movements nearly as fast as any ghouls. 

“Lets go meet up with Hirako.” And with that, Arima turned and started to walk away. Shinohara followed, smiling down reassuringly as Juuzou looked up at him. 

“Juuzou,” Arima said, his voice echoing off of the walls around them, “Come here.”

Juuzou trotted up next to him, then looked up at him warily. “Yes, Mr. Arima?”

“Have you ever played ‘Whack-A-Mole’ at the arcade?”

“Mmm…” Juuzou thought, chewing his lip. “Yeah, I have once!”

“Well, that’s what we call being in the 24th ward. Why do you suppose that is?”

Juuzou hummed and shrugged. “Not sure.”

“It’s because ghouls pop out from every side, and then we whack them.”

“That sounds fun!” Juuzou exclaimed, awe in his voice. 

“I think so,” Arima replied, looking down at Juuzou as they walked. 

Shinohara trailed just behind, listening to their conversation with rapt attention. As always, Arima was unreadable. Shinohara knew that he had a specific reputation among his subordinates; he was a difficult leader, exacting, demanding. That wasn’t necessarily a bad thing—his squads were always disciplined, they worked well together, and they could take out nearly any ghoul. Juuzou was an exceptional talent, but he appeared undisciplined, and his idiosyncratic body stitching and sloppy clothing put most investigators off. Shinohara had watched Arima come up through the CCG, advancing faster than anyone before him ever had. He had been an exceptional talent as well, but even at 16, he’d acted more adult than child-like. Juuzou was nineteen years old, but he looked and acted much younger. Shinohara couldn’t help but wonder how they would work together, and so he remained on his guard. 

“If there’s an low-ranking ghoul, I’ll let you kill it,” Arima said as he walked. “How does that sound?”

“Great!” Juuzou replied, turning around and grinning over his shoulder at Shinohara. Shinohara smiled back, a bit uneasily. But at least things seemed to be progressing well. So far, so good. 

***

His chance came quickly; much more quickly that Shinohara preferred. The ghoul was trapped in a hopeless situation — a young male, barely bigger than Juuzou himself. He looked at the investigators before him with a savage, hopeless rage, knowing Arima and Shinohara well enough by reputation to be terrified. But he was cornered, and cornered beasts were dangerous. Juuzou ran at him, avoided the swipe of his Rinkaku before flipping over him. The knife moved so fast that Shinohara didn’t see it, just saw half of the kagune fall away, crumbling into the ground. Juuzou was laughing with wild abandon, goading the ghoul again and again with cries of “Do your best!”

The ghoul snarled and growled like an animal, and Shinohara stepped forward, one hand wrapped tightly around the handle of his quinque. Arima’s arm stopped him. 

“No,” he said simply, his voice calm. “Watch him.”

Juuzou flipped back over the ghoul, and another section of kagune fell to the ground. Laughter echoed off of the walls. 

“Please!” Juuzou yelled, “Fight hard!” 

But the ghoul’s kagune had been shortened to such a degree that it was near-useless. Juuzou took an opening, launching himself forward and opening the ghoul’s throat. That alone might not have been enough to end him—rinkaku ghouls had amazing regenerative capacity—but Juuzou let the force of his momentum bring them both crashing to the ground, his scorpion flashing through the air as he left cut after cut after cut. Again, Shinohara moved forward, but Arima’s arm was firm. 

“Watch him,” Arima repeated. There was something in his eyes, something bright, but it slipped away just as Shinohara caught sight of it. “Just watch him.”

The ghoul was trying to scream, gurgling noise bubbling forth from its throat as Juuzou cut neatly through its limbs. 

“Article 13,” Shinohara started, but Arima shook his head. Juuzou’s laughter was deafening. 

“Hold on!” Juuzou yelled, “Don’t die! Please don’t die!” But there was no hope of obedience from this ghoul—his body shuddered one last time, though Juuzou continued to bring his scorpion down again and again and again. Finally, Shinohara had had enough. He pushed Arima’s arm away and went forward, one great hand coming to rest on Juuzou’s slender back. 

“Enough,” he muttered. Then, louder, “Juuzou, that’s enough!”

Juuzou tipped his head backward until he was staring at Shinohara upside-down with wide, bloodshot eyes. He grinned. 

“Was I a good boy?” 

Shinohara swallowed. Something that he couldn’t define twisted deep within him. Juuzou stared at him expectantly. He cleared his throat and replied, “Yes, you did well, Juuzou. Now come on…he’s dead.”

Juuzou shrugged and popped up, arms in the air. “I killed him!” He yelled out gleefully, still laughing. “Mr. Arima, did you see?

“I did,” Arima replied, a smile playing at the corners of his lips. “Was this your first kill?”

“Uhhhhh,” Juuzou started, but Shinohara cut in.

“First official kill.”

“Very impressive,” Arima nodded approvingly. 

Shinohara looked over at the dismembered body of the ghoul, looked at Juuzou covered head to toe in blood, ebullient. 

“That was fun!” Juuzou exclaimed, “Can we do it again?”

“Down here,” Arima replied, his eyes on Shinohara, “That’s all we really do.” 

***

After the killing of the ghoul, Juuzou was wild, climbing the walls and flipping off of them, running circles around Shinohara and the rest of the team. Shinohara heard him muttering and whispering to himself, but couldn’t quite make out the words. Arima watched him with interest. Hirako, who was fairly quiet, seemed to be trying to ignore him. It was just as well, Shinohara reasoned. 

Shinohara was of sufficient rank that he had been told a bit about Arima’s purpose in the 24th ward. The CCG had long been suspicious of this place, a labyrinth beneath the city comprised of RC cell walls and harboring nests of dangerous ghouls. There were whispers of a powerful, shadowy organization that had existed as long as anyone remembered. It was in the CCG’s best interest to root them out, and with Arima, they had a chance to oppose such a group. If Arima deemed it worthwhile, they captured ghouls from the 24th ward alive and questioned them in Cochlea, but more often then not, it was a simple slaughter. Ghouls may have held the advantages in speed, strength, and biological weaponry, but humans held the advantage in sheer volume. Even so, “whack-a-mole” was a good descriptor for what happened down here. It was a slow, arduous extermination. For every ghoul they got rid of, several more would pop up in its place. Shinohara wondered how Arima handled it, the monotony of this. Perhaps, like Juuzou, he took pleasure in the work.

For Shinohara, exterminating ghouls wasn’t the most attractive aspect of being an investigator. He had climbed the ranks to Special Class by killing many ghouls, but he took no particular pleasure in it. It was a necessary task. Where Shinohara found his pleasure was in teaching, nurturing the aspirations of younger investigators, watching those he taught grow up and excel. It was a task that came imbued with a certain amount of sorrow—when those bright young men and women were killed in the line of duty, Shinohara mourned them. But he knew how to separate his professional duties from his personal feelings. He knew that all of them had chosen to put their lives on the line. No one came to work at the CCG without understanding the risks. This battle was arduous and never-ending, but at least they found solace in one another, in drinking and laughing after a successful mission, in honoring the dead and swearing to avenge them. The work was not entirely thankless. 

Eventually, the clock said that it was time to go home for the day, and Shinohara was relieved. Juuzou needed to wash the blood from his skin, and tomorrow would be another day of trawling these dark tunnels. Because Juuzou was still crusted in blood, Shinohara called a CCG driver to take them home. As they rode along, Juuzou stared out the window in silence, his breathing strangely shallow. Shinohara wondered at the way his eyes had gone bloodshot after killing the ghoul, wondered at the question he’d asked— _was I a good boy?_ —wondered at the way he chattered to himself and couldn’t seem to calm down. Shinohara filed the behavior away.

When they got home, Juuzou tottered into the shower, and Shinohara ordered some noodles to be delivered. Neither of them had enough energy left to go anywhere, and cooking was out of the question. They ate in relative silence, Juuzou moving almost mechanically, silent and contemplative. Shinohara wanted to ask him what he was thinking about, but he wasn’t sure if he had the right. If Juuzou wanted to think on the day in silence, it wouldn’t be right to interrupt him. 

He laid in bed awake for quite some time, listening, but Juuzou never made a sound. Eventually, sleep found him.

***

Working in the 24th ward was more or less a success. Juuzou slaughtered several ghouls on his own, and participated in several other fights as Shinohara, Arima, or Hirako backed him up. At night, he was quiet, almost unnaturally so. In the morning, as they made their commute to the entrance of the 24th ward, Juuzou would chatter away excitedly, making it almost impossible for Shinohara to get a word in edgewise. 

It concerned him, however, that Juuzou seemed to be changing. He spent more and more time muttering to himself, and several times Shinohara had lost him entirely, only to find him later kicking his feet from the rooftop of their apartment building. He hadn’t hurt a human in a week, but Shinohara wondered if the dark, dank walls of the 24th ward were taking their toll. Perhaps they could end their time there soon, and focus more on how to walk among the public. 

They were riding the train home when it happened. 

Shinohara was distracted, replying to to the deluge of emails he was receiving about the trouble in the 11th ward, fielding requests for documents and information, and writing up a progress report for Director Washuu regarding his observations of Juuzou’s ability and aptitude. Juuzou had wandered off, as usual, and Shinohara didn’t think much of it. It was his custom, and he had managed to keep himself out of trouble so far. Just as they reached their stop, however, someone screamed, and Shinohara looked over just in time to catch a flash of white hair slipping out of the door. He looked toward the direction of the scream and saw a man holding his hand, bleeding. Shinohara approached him with his CCG badge out and an apology on his tongue, but the man waved him away. 

“It’s nothing, it’s nothing,” he muttered, but Shinohara took him by the elbow and steered him out the doors of the train nevertheless.

“I have to file a report,” he said placatingly. “And the bureau will cover your medical expenses…”

“No!” the man yelled, his face panicked. “Just let me…just let me go!”

Shocked, Shinohara let go of the man’s elbow. In seconds, he’d slipped back onto the train, the doors sliding shut after him. Juuzou was walking away, hands shoved in his pockets, and Shinohara ran to catch up with him. 

“What happened?” he asked, but Juuzou ignored him. “Juuzou,” he tried again, “Why did you cut him?”

Juuzou shrugged and walked faster. Shinohara waited until they were away from the crowd, then put a firm hand on Juuzou’s shoulder. 

“Hey,” he said, trying to keep his tone light. “Juuzou, I need you to tell me why you did that.”

Juuzou finally stopped, his eyes darting around. “He…”

Shinohara nodded, encouraging him to go on. 

“He said I was a girl. I told him I was a boy…so he reached down and…he deserved it!”

Shinohara’s gut twisted and he frowned. “Are you alright?”

“I cut him,” Juuzou shrugged. “So he didn’t touch me after all. Scum like that…” 

“You did fine,” Shinohara muttered, wishing he’d known before the man escaped onto the train. “Maybe now he’ll think twice…”

“I should have killed him.”

Shinohara stared at Juuzou, but Juuzou wouldn’t meet his eyes. He had that flighty look about him, that same feral look that he’d had when they first met. Standing there on the sidewalk, Shinohara wasn’t sure how to react. The man’s actions made him sick, but killing humans wasn’t something that he could condone. 

“Come on,” he said finally, smiling down at Juuzou. “Lets get some supper.” 

“Alright,” Juuzou replied, looking off to the side. “I want curry.”

“Well then,” Shinohara replied, striding forward. “Curry it is.”

They could discuss it more later.

***

Though they’d managed to avoid disaster, the effects of the encounter had not been entirely mitigated. Juuzou’s eyes were strangely glazed over and bloodshot, and his demeanor was slightly off. He stabbed at the meat and vegetables in his curry and looked around the room, his eyes roving constantly. Shinohara wasn’t sure what to do for him or how to make it better, so he tried to start conversation a few times, but Juuzou just hummed and sighed out his responses, clearly more interested in their surroundings than in anything that Shinohara had to say. 

When they arrived back home, Juuzou skittered off to his room, and unsure of what to do, Shinohara took up his usual end-of-the-day post on the couch, staring blankly at the television. Lost in his thoughts, he didn’t notice when Juuzou slid out of the shadows of the hallway and stole behind the couch. When warm fingers pressed to the pulse point in his neck, he jumped and cursed, turning around just in time to catch Juuzou’s frightened stare. 

“Oh, Juuzou,” he said, sighing out his relief, “You scared me.”

Juuzou climbed over the couch and slid down next to him. “Can I listen?” he asked, pushing his finger into Shinohara’s chest. 

“Uh,” Shinohara wasn’t sure what he meant. “To what?”

“This,” he said, poking Shinohara’s chest again. 

“Sure.”

Juuzou wiggled under his arm and pressed his head against Shinohara’s chest, ear just over his heart. Slowly, Shinohara put his arm around Juuzou’s shoulder, and found himself surprised anew by how small he was, curled up like this and pressed close. It was strange to be offered so much physical contact after such a very long time without it. Shinohara hadn’t sought a physical relationship in so long, and being close like this, breath evening out until it matched another’s, felt almost intoxicatingly good. Juuzou’s slender arm came to rest across Shinohara’s stomach, and he rested there, his body slowly relaxing. 

The show on television ended, and another one began. Shinohara wondered if Juuzou had fallen asleep until he pulled away just enough to stare up at him. 

“Juuzou,” he started, “You know that, as an investigator, your job is to protect humans, right?”

Juuzou looked off, sighed. 

“You can protect yourself, too,” he added in quickly, “But you should only hurt other people if you have to. We’re meant to keep them safe.”

“They don’t deserve it.” Juuzou replied flatly, eyes fixed on Shinohara’s shoulder. “They’re pigs.”

“Some of them,” Shinohara conceded. “That man today was. But there are good people too.”

“I don’t care,” Juuzou sighed, falling back again to Shinohara’s chest, eyes fluttering closed. 

“You don’t have to care, not necessarily,” Shinohara tried to think of how he could make this easier for Juuzou. “As long as you know it’s your job. If you want to look at it as just killing ghouls, that’s alright, I guess. But you have to remember that hurting people isn’t okay. And if you must protect yourself from people, just…do what you have to, and nothing more. Often, showing them your CCG badge will make them back away, you know.” 

“Really?” Juuzou asked, yawning. 

“Try it,” Shinohara said. 

After that, Juuzou was silent, head rising and falling with the movement of Shinohara’s breathing. Eventually, Shinohara dozed off. 

***

When the weekend rolled around, Shinohara suggested (somewhat reluctantly) that they go and view some apartments that had come up for rent. There were a few units close to Shinohara’s building, and with Juuzou’s salary as an investigator, they would be within a reasonable budget. Juuzou proclaimed this activity boring, so Shinohara promised him they would be able to visit the candy store on the way there. Predictably, Juuzou’s enthusiasm blossomed at the prospect. With that settled, they only had the matter of Juuzou’s clothing to deal with. Shinohara spent a solid fifteen minutes trying to explain that Juuzou needed to dress respectably for this occasion, but he didn’t seem to care, flitting about his room and finally emerging in the oversized pants and shirt that Shinohara had given him, bunny slippers on his feet. 

Shinohara frowned. “I don’t suppose I can convince you to wear proper shoes?”

“Nope!” Juuzou replied in a sing song tone, “Candy time!”

And they were off. 

The store that they stopped at was so brightly lit that each jellybean and gummy bear shone like so many jewels, safely encased in their plastic tubes. Juuzou grabbed five bags and began filling them up with every sweet he came across. Shinohara scratched the back of his neck nervously…perhaps they should have gone to a corner store instead. At this rate, he wasn’t sure if they would ever leave, and Juuzou would be so sugar-high, he was doubtless to make a strange impression on any potential landlords that they came across. Nevertheless, he seemed so happy, Shinohara had little desire to curb his enthusiasm. 

As Juuzou ran around collecting his candies, Shinohara wandered over and grabbed a few chocolates, making a small bag of his own. He had to watch how many sweets he ate these days—after all, he wasn’t as young as he used to be—but a few here and there wouldn’t hurt too much. He turned to find Juuzou and saw him at the counter, looking up at a very furious looking shop owner. 

“Juuzou?” he asked with a frown, walking toward him quickly. “What’s going on?”

“Are you her father?” the shop owner spat out, eyes flashing as he turned toward Shinohara. 

“What?” Shinohara asked, momentarily confused. 

“No!” Juuzou slammed his CCG ID badge on the counter. “And I’m not a girl, you fucking idiot.”

“What did you say? What-…” the badge registered with the man, and he opened his mouth to speak, but Shinohara jumped in. 

“We just need to buy these things, that’s all. I’m sorry if there was a misunderstanding.” 

“This…he said he wasn’t going to pay.”

“Is that true?” Shinohara asked, arching a brow at Juuzou, who shuffled his feet nervously. 

“I’m a CCG investigator,” Juuzou muttered. 

“Even CCG investigators have to pay for their candy, Juuzou,” Shinohara said softly. 

Shinohara offered the man some cash, told him to keep the change, and shuffled Juuzou out of the shop. 

“What was that about?” he asked as they walked away, Juuzou already breaking into a bag and shoving candy into his mouth. 

“He was rude. So I showed him my badge and told him I was taking the candy,” Juuzou replied around his mouthful. 

“Juuzou, when I said that you can show people your badge to get them to stop bothering you, I didn’t mean that you could use it…like that…you can’t just use it to get the things that you want for free.”

Juuzou was quiet, eating his candy and walking three steps ahead of Shinohara, despite the length of his legs. Shinohara hoped that his words had sunk in, but he wasn’t entirely sure that they had. He filed the lesson away on his ever-growing list of things that Juuzou needed to learn. 

The apartment building was just a few blocks away, and the landlord met them at the entrance. 

“Oh,” she said, unsure as her eyes travelled from Juuzou’s sticky fingers to Shinohara’s face. “Are you…the prospective tenants?”

“He is,” Shinohara said with a smile that he hoped was reassuring. 

“I see,” the landlord replied, “Well, nice to meet you. If you’ll follow me, I’ll show you the unit.” 

“Thank you,” Shinohara said, nodding at Juuzou, who smiled with reddened teeth. 

The landlord looked at the smile dubiously, but led them to the elevator all the same. 

“It’s very small,” she said, “But clean. The previous tenant was an older woman, and she took good care of it.”

“That’s good,” Shinohara smiled. “He doesn’t need much room.”

They arrived at the room and the landlord unlocked the door. Juuzou brushed past her rudely and stepped inside. He hopped down the narrow hall, took a cursory glance at the kitchen, and walked a circle around the main room. It was tiny—one room, a kitchen, a bathroom and a hall was all the space it had. Juuzou frowned back at Shinohara. 

“I hate it.”

Shinohara laughed, trying in vain to diffuse the tremendous frown that now colored the landlord’s face. 

“Well, you’ve hardly looked at it,” Shinohara urged. “There’s a bathroom over there, and a closet…”

“I hate it,” Juuzou replied with a shrug. “Its ugly. Let’s go. Thank you, Miss Landlord.”

“I-…” she started, looking to Shinohara.

“Ah, well, I suppose he’s pickier than I thought,” Shinohara smiled apologetically. “Sorry to waste your time.”

“Yes, oh…well, alright,” the landlord tried to recover as Juuzou brushed past her again and sped out of the door. 

Shinohara shrugged and waved, following after Juuzou, wondering why he was acting this way. He’d been in a mood all day, or at least it seemed so. Perhaps it was because he wasn’t going to hunt ghouls. He’d been getting rather used to the routine of walking long, lightless days through the labyrinth of the underground. Perhaps he needed that outlet for his considerable energy. 

The next two units were quite similar, and Juuzou rejected them both in quick order. Shinohara only had one other address written down for today, and it was the largest of the units. If Juuzou hated this one as well, they were back to square one. 

“Juuzou,” Shinohara said as they walked to the next unit. 

“Hmmmmm?” Juuzou was distracted, examining a sour gummy cherry. He popped it into his mouth, screwed his face into a grimace and chewed mightily. Shinohara didn’t want to smile—this was serious—but despite his best efforts, the corners of his lips turned up just a bit. 

“This next place is the last one on the list.”

“Good.”

“Listen, Juuzou, please just give it a chance, okay? It’s bigger than the other units and the building is nicer. I think you’ll like it.”

Juuzou looked down at his feet, shrugged. Shinohara assumed that was the best he was going to get. 

The landlord was a small man, just a hair taller than Juuzou and sporting a sad combover on a prematurely balding head. His face betrayed his age, but his paunch and combover gave him the look of a man a few decades older, at least. Shinohara smiled and bowed, confirmed that yes, it was Juuzou who was the prospective tenant despite his appearance, and frowned wearily as Juuzou smiled and told the landlord that he almost never saw grown people as short as himself. The landlord seemed miffed, but led them to the unit regardless. The unit held a bedroom, a full bathroom, space for a table, a sitting area, and a full kitchen. It was cheaper than it should have been, and the landlord explained that there was construction across the street that was causing such a disturbance that he’d lost several tenants and couldn’t rent the units out. 

As they exited the bedroom, it occurred to Shinohara that he hadn’t seen Juuzou in a few minutes. The apartment was larger than the others, but no so large that one could get lost in it. “Juuzou?” he called out. Nothing.

The landlord walked to the narrow front hallway and looked about. A moment later, a flash of white came crashing down from the ceiling and onto him, his scream lost in the sound of Juuzou’s peeling laughter. 

“Get off of me you freak!” the man yelled, cursing and writhing around. 

“I’m not a freak!” Juuzou yelled out, and the man reached up and slapped him so hard that the sound echoed through the hall. 

It happened so fast that Shinohara didn’t have time to react, but the slap spurred him into action. 

“You pig!” Juuzou screamed, stitched fingers coming down, wrapping themselves in the sparse hairs that the man had combed over his shining scalp.

“Juuzou, no!” Shinohara called, close enough to close a hand on Juuzou’s shoulder. But it was too late—before he could pull Juuzou away, those deft fingers had pulled, a startling chunk of hair grasped in them while the man below screamed, cursed, and writhed about. 

Shinohara pulled Juuzou away while he laughed and struggled, holding up the chunk of hair like a battle trophy. 

“You’re full of filth,” Juuzou spat on the landlord. “Don’t ever touch me again.”

“Juuzou _enough_ ,” Shinohara said, holding his slender arms in a tight grip. “Enough!”

The man was already dialing up the police.

***

 

Shinohara smiled and scratched the back of his neck and showed his CCG identification and slapped backs and made allusions to important investigative work and finally, with a sigh of relief, filled out a claim form for the landlord, whose head was starting to scab over by the end of it all. Eventually, things were smoothed over, or at least as smooth as they would get. Juuzou had disappeared long before, and Shinohara had an idea of where he might have gone. With glum determination, he made his way up to the roof. 

His partner was there, standing just on the edge of the roof, looking down serenely at the deadly drop, arms extended as balance. 

“Juuzou,” Shinohara said gently. 

“He was a pig,” Juuzou mumbled. “He deserved worse.”

Shinohara sighed, stopping a few feet away from Juuzou, not wanting to get too close to the edge. 

“Juuzou, why did you jump on him like that?”

“I wanted to,” Juuzou replied, turning around to look at Shinohara, crossing his arms defensively over his chest. 

“Juuzou, he hadn’t even done anything to you.”

“I was just having fun,” Juuzou replied defiantly, “And I could tell he was a pig. He looked at me like a pig.”

Shinohara sighed. “Come here,” he muttered, and then, when Juuzou hesitated, he squatted down so his eye level was below Juuzou’s. He’d learned the trick in a nature documentary. The man in the documentary used it when dealing with feral animals, in order to appear less threatening. As if by magic, Juuzou drew closer, one step at a time, then sat down cross-legged before him, like a child waiting to be told a story.    
“Is something bothering you, Juuzou?” Shinohara asked, staring down into the boy’s great, wide eyes. 

“No,” Juuzou replied, rubbing at the stitches on his arm. 

“Are you sure?” Shinohara prompted softly. 

Juuzou popped up from where he sat and walked closer to Shinohara, then walked in a little circle around him. Finally, he draped his arms around Shinohara’s neck from behind and whispered in his ear, “Why don’t you want me to live with you?”

“Is that the problem?” Shinohara chuckled, staring straight ahead, trying to ignore the thrill the shot up the length of his spine before settling in his gut. He could feel Juuzou’s head nodding, his soft hair brushing Shinohara’s neck. “Of course you can stay with me,” he murmured, “Juuzou…I…I thought you’d want a space of your own.”

“No,” Juuzou muttered. “Too quiet.” 

“Listen,” Shinohara turned his head and Juuzou pulled back enough to look at him. “Next time, just tell me when you want something, okay?”

Juuzou nodded. 

“Okay,” Shinohara nodded back, then pressed his lips together. “Lets go home.”

***

“What a time you’ve had,” bureau director Washuu said, pouring them each a cup of tea. “I supposed he’s earned his moniker.”

“He’s learning,” Shinohara accepted his tea with a nod. “As…disturbing as his sadism can be, after observing his activities in the 24th ward, I think it’s safe to say that he’s got tremendous potential.”

“Arima certainly thinks so,” Washuu murmured over the rim of his cup. 

“You’ve spoken to him?”

“Oh yes, we have weekly meetings to discuss his findings. He seems to think that your Problem Child will advance quickly and go far. I trust Arima’s judgment in these things. His…fascinations are generally accurate.”

“So he supports Juuzou’s work for the CCG?”

“Without a doubt. Do you?”

“Certainly,” Shinohara rubbed his hand over his face. “With ghouls, he’s a killing machine. His people skills…”

“There’s plenty of time to work on them,” Washuu interjected. “On your new assignment.”

“New assignment?” Shinohara asked, tilting his head. 

“I’m sending the both of you to the 20th ward, along with a few others…” Washuu replied, sipping at his tea serenely. 

“The 20th ward?” Shinohara asked. “Because Mado…” His gut twisted a bit. Mado had been an important mentor to him, and to many others as well. He still referred to Mado’s teachings on a regular basis, and though he had eventually outranked the man several times over, he still considered him one of the best and most knowledgeable investigators at the CCG. When he’d heard that the man had been killed…well, it had been a rough day. He’d called on Mado’s daughter, Akira, but she hadn’t been interested in visitors. It was still hard to believe he was gone. 

“Mado, yes. But there’s been an uptick in dangerous ghouls…last we knew, the Binge Eater was there, as well as the Gourmet. Now we have the Rabbit, the one who killed Mado, and…”

Shinohara leaned forward, setting his tea on the desk. “Is there more, Director?”

Washuu leaned back in his seat and sighed. 

“We’ve lost the 11th ward, almost entirely.”

Shinohara sighed and looked down at his lap. This was something that they had long feared. Whispers of a ghoul organization that was systematically wiping out investigators had been flying for some time, now, but Shinohara had been too embroiled in his teaching and his work with Juuzou to pay much attention.

“Now, we’re seeing investigators killed in the 9th, 10th, and 12th wards. We’re concerned about a pincer attack…and concerned for the satellite offices in the far-flung wards. With the Gourmet, the Binge Eater, and the White Rabbit, we feel like the 20th ward needs some backup. There’s a chance…no, there’s evidence to suggest that they are organizing. And that organization is attempting to crush us.”

“I understand,” Shinohara muttered. 

“You’ll take Juuzou, and you’ll be accompanied by Houji and his partner, rank two Takizawa. Amon Koutarou is there, though we’ve not found him a suitable partner yet.”

“Mado’s will?” Shinohara asked. 

“I understand that Mado wanted him to be promoted,” Washuu nodded, “But I’m not yet sure. Mado would not have died, had Amon stuck by him the night they were attacked. I’d like to see him prove himself worthy of a subordinate before he’s given one.” 

“A wise decision,” Shinohara agreed. 

“I’ve also heard a rumor, Shinohara.”

“A rumor?”

“Well, perhaps not a rumor. To be precise. Arima seems to be under the impression that your partner acts as something of bait to ghouls.”

“Oh,” Shinohara chuckled, “That. He does seems to possess a scent that attracts them. In the 24th ward, ghouls would come to us at a higher rate. It seems that his scent smells more delicious to them than average human flesh.”

“I wonder why?” Washuu mused, sipping at the last of his tea. 

“He does eat a rather fantastic amount of sugar…” 

Washuu smiled grimly. “We might have Dr. Chigyou take a sample of his blood for analysis.”

Shinohara felt an uncomfortable twist in his gut, but he nodded non-chalantly. “Perhaps it would be a good idea.” 

“I think that will be all,” Washuu said with a smile. “The two of you will be deployed by next week. Until then…training.”

“Yes, sir,” Shinohara stood and bowed. “Thank you.” 

“Oh and…” Washuu started. Shinohara turned to look at him once more. “I think it’s admirable how much you’ve taken the boy under your wing.”

“Thank you,” Shinohara nodded. 

“Though I doubt I’ve ever heard of two partners living together.”

“Ah,” Shinohara scratched at the back of his neck. “You heard about that as well?”

“Of course,” Washuu nodded. “You’re dismissed.”


	3. Tomorrow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It happened all at once, Houji feinting with the quinque, then catching the dodging Juuzou square in the torso with his heel. Juuzou tumbled across the mat with a little yell, then laid there, motionless. The gym was silent, everyone waiting for him to spring back up, to laugh, to move, but there was nothing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise! A new chapter!
> 
> Comments and kudos are love <3 Thank you everyone for the warm reception you've given my little story!

It was Arima’s seventh cup of sake—Shinohara had counted. He didn’t seem fazed. It was this quality, this reptilian coolness that gave Arima such a reputation among the younger investigators at the CCG. People found him to be otherworldly, practically inhuman…untouchable. Shinohara understood the temptation. When he’d watched Arima climb through the ranks, he’d heard the whispers. But he’d tempered them with what he knew to be the truth. Arima was human, and some humans were exceptional. But were a kagune to pierce him, he would still bleed, and perhaps even die. 

Arima was human.

Or so he’d thought. He was only three cups in, and the warm crawl of the alcohol was already making it’s way up his spine, running hot through his veins. He wasn’t sure how Arima could down so much without speaking in slurs, but then again, he’d never been great at holding his alcohol. Today had been the last day that they would spend in the 24th Ward, and going out for drinks was customary on such an occasion. However, Juuzou hadn’t seemed interested in joining, so Arima, Shinohara, and Take had ended up sitting lopsidedly around a table, imbibing together. 

“Take,” Arima muttered, finishing his sake and pouring another. 

“Yes sir?” Take asked, his tone neutral, but his eyes fixed on the cup that sat before him. 

“I hope you have learned something from Shinohara, here. And from his subordinate.”

“From his subordinate?” Take asked. His tone stayed admirably neutral, but Shinohara could see his grip on the cup tighten. 

“Juuzou fights in the most incredible way,” Arima continued on, ignoring the strain in Take’s knuckles, the tightening of his shoulders. “With absolute abandon, yet absolute control. An investigator like that can do great things.”

“Yes, sir,” Take replied. Then he drained his cup in a series of quick gulps and set it down on the table, hard. 

“Take is impressive himself,” Shinohara shrugged, but Take’s knuckles went white where he gripped his cup, and Shinohara sensed that he might have said the wrong thing. 

Arima smiled. “Perhaps he should be your subordinate then. I’m sure Washuu could arrange something.”

At first Shinohara wasn’t sure what to say. A part of him reacted strongly, almost viscerally, but he tamped it down. It was harmless teasing, that was all. It had to be. 

“An old man like me?” He asked, then he laughed. It was a good laugh, long and hearty. “Take is too advanced for that, I’m afraid. Although I imagine Juuzou could learn a thing or two from you.”

Arima smiled, and poured himself another cup. 

“Well,” Take nodded to each of them. “I’ll be going.” 

“One hundred pushups before you sleep,” Arima said, eyeing him with unguarded disdain. “You’re getting soft.”

Take set his jaw and bowed. 

“Night!” Shinohara waved at him. Take nodded and walked out. 

“You’re hard on him,” Shinohara noted, pouring another cup of sake.

“He’s undisciplined,” Arima replied with a shrug. “It’s embarrassing.”

“Yet you would take Juuzou?” 

Arima sipped at his sake. 

“Honestly, I can’t even get him to wear proper shoes. But you consider Take undisciplined?”

“I consider the results,” Arima replied, impassive. “Juuzou would throw himself into the jaws of death itself, without fear or hesitation. Not unlike the Indomitable Shinohara.”

“Not unlike the God of Death,” Shinohara countered. 

“He’ll be a Special Class one day, with the right teacher,” Arima looked at Shinohara pointedly. “Don’t you agree?”

Shinohara considered it. Arima spoke about it as if he could see it all before him in a clearly laid arc. Shinohara wasn’t so sure, himself. If Juuzou was a Special Class, he would have subordinates of his own. As it were, Shinohara couldn’t even get him to bow properly to his superiors. Were he to advance to Special Class, he would have to grow a great deal first. 

Still…his aptitude was incredible. And there was something about him, something else that whispered of legend. A boy tormented by ghouls, forced to kill, redeeming the lives of his human victims with the blood of ghouls. Shinohara imagined him, white hair soaked red, a quinque grasped in his slender hands, and nodded. 

“I do,” he muttered. “Strangely enough, I do.”

***

Shinohara stumbled home, pausing briefly to wretch in a trash can. The fourth cup had been one too many, he realized that now. Drinking wasn’t his forte, and typically, he avoided it. But he’d wanted to pick Arima’s brain a bit further in regards to Juuzou, and he’d felt fine until he stood up. Alcohol was tricky that way—it always seemed to sneak up on him. Exhausted and woozy, he stumbled through his door, threw his keys in the dish, and slumped toward the bathroom. 

After relieving himself, he brushed his teeth to rid his mouth of the acrid taste of vomit, then stripped down and got into the shower. The 24th ward was an interesting experience, but he felt like it might take a week of showers to wash the damp and grime of it from his memory. Clean and warm, he emerged, wrapped his towel around his hips, and turned around to see Juuzou standing against the door. 

He jumped at the sight, his sluggish mind taking a moment to catch up with the situation before he sighed and relaxed. 

“Juuzou,” he said, rubbing his hand over his face. “You shouldn’t just walk in here like that.”

“Why?” Juuzou asked, then he wrinkled his nose. “Are you drunk?”

“Yes,” Shinohara replied, “Well…less drunk, now.”

Juuzou hummed. 

“Did you find your way back okay?” 

“Yes,” Juuzou replied, eyeing him. “Did Mr. Arima get drunk?”

“Not that I could tell.”

Juuzou appeared to be processing this information for a moment, then he slipped out the door without a word. Shinohara shook his head, rubbed his face, and finished drying off. He hadn’t considered locking the door—it had been so long since he’d felt a need to—but seeing Juuzou unexpectedly made him rethink that. 

“Boundaries,” he muttered to no one in particular, “He needs to learn boundaries.”

Feeling woozy again, he crawled into bed and turned out the lamp. He needed to rest. 

***

_Soft hands slipped over his short hair, ghosted across the skin of his face, thumbed lightly at his ears. Shinohara moaned and tried to move but he was paralyzed, surrounded by darkness and whispers. A sliver of silver light brought great dark eyes into focus, tender smiling lips, a shock of white hair. Those lips dipped closer and brushed along the edge of his jaw, small puffs of breath blowing hot on the sensitive skin of his neck._

_“You’re scratchy,” the voice whispered, giggled into his ear. A thrill shot down his spine. A weight shifted around him, fell across him, enveloped him, soft touches making their way down his back._

_“Tattoo!” the exclamation was punctuated by another giggle, and Shinohara began to think he might recognize the voice._

_“Juu-…zou?” Shinohara managed to whisper, but his voice felt faint and far away, the effort of it scratching at his throat like sandpaper. Was he dreaming?_

_“Shhh,” the voice whispered. “Sleep.”_

_The weight lifted off of him, soft feet padding away, and he slid back into the nothingness of sleep._

***

He awoke to the sound of his head being split in two. 

For a moment, he kept his eyes closed, flailing in the general direction of his alarm, but it was no good, he couldn’t seem to find it. He cracked one eye open experimentally and instantly regretted it, but the alarm was more than he could bear. With a heavy sigh, he succumbed to the torment of the sunlight streaming through his window, turned over, and slammed the snooze button as hard as he could. 

So this was why he didn’t drink. 

He laid in bed for a moment, wondering why he was such an idiot, wishing he’d had the foresight to drink some water before bed, or to take an aspirin. His throat felt like the Sahara, but he couldn’t motivate himself to get up. Somehow, he slipped into a doze, only for the alarm to screech again moments later. With a terrific groan, he turned the damned thing off, and pushed himself up to a sitting position. This would be a paperwork day. 

It wasn’t until he started pulling on his clothes that he remembered the…dream? Had it been a dream? He wasn’t sure. His first impulse was to ask Juuzou about it, but as he pulled his shirt on and did up the buttons, he played out the conversation in his mind.

_Juuzou, did you come into my room last night and rub your face and hands all over me?_

A question like that made him sound like a pervert, even if it had happened. Then again, Juuzou had walked into the bathroom while he was in the shower, unannounced. It wasn’t outside of the realm of possibility. He pulled on his pants, slid a belt out of the closet, and shook his head. There was no way to ask without risking making Juuzou uncomfortable, so he chose to believe that it was dream, and went about his business. When he got to the kitchen to make coffee, Juuzou was sitting at the table, gnawing on great white pieces of toast, honey coating his fingers and dripping down his hands. 

“Good morning!” Juuzou called out, sending a bolt of pain through Shinohara’s temples. Shinohara winced, but Juuzou kept going all the same. “We’re training today right? Right? Right?”

Shinohara groaned as he turned on the electric kettle. “I don’t think so, Juuzou…probably just paperwork, today. There’s a lot to do for the transfer.”

“But _I thought_ …”

“I know, I know. But I don’t feel good, and there’s a lot to get done.”

Juuzou huffed and pouted, lips shiny with honey. Shinohara remembered soft lips ghosting over his jawline and grimaced.

“Tomorrow, Juuzou, I promise.”

“But I’m going to be _so bored_. Paperwork is _so boring_ and I bet you only feel bad because you got drunk anyway.”

Shinohara sighed and rubbed at his temples. “Yep, that’s true. I’m hungover. But even if I wasn’t, we’d have to do paperwork some time. So we might as well do it today.”

Juuzou sighed, but dropped it. Shinohara looked at him surreptitiously as he poured boiling water into a mug and stirred in some instant coffee. He didn’t have the wherewithal to make the drip variety this morning, not when he felt like this. Juuzou licked drops of honey from his hands, his small pink tongue darting out to catch them. Shinohara wasn’t aware of his staring until Juuzou looked up, eyes wide. 

“What?”

“Oh!” Shinohara wasn’t sure what to say, so he just shrugged and offered a half-assed, “Sorry. I’m tired.” 

Juuzou hummed and returned to his toast. Shinohara sighed, rubbed his face, and downed his coffee. It was going to take at least two cups to get him going for the day. He wished he knew what it would take for him to forget that dream. Or what it might take to get him to stop doubting that it was a dream at all…

***

“I’m _so bored_ ,” Juuzou cried out, so loud that it made Shinohara jump. He’d been dozing, somehow, though he hadn’t meant to. The sun drifted in lazily, slanting across his desk, warming his shoulder and neck, catching bits of dust in the air. Juuzou had been sitting in the chair in the corner, though “sitting” was a bit of a stretch—he was backwards, his legs stuck up straight in the air, his white hair streaming down off of the seat, his phone bleeping softly with a video game song. It was hard to stay awake, and concentrating was completely off the menu. 

“Shiiiiiinnnnn-oooooo-haaaaaa-raaaaaaaaaa,” Juuzou drew his name out so far, Shinohara thought he might need to stop for breath. 

“Yes Juuzou,” he finally replied, looking up over his reading glasses. 

“If you don’t want to train with me, who will?”

“I will train with you…” 

Juuzou’s eyes lit up.

“…tomorrow.”

Juuzou made the most petulant noise that Shinohara had ever heard.    
“Okay, tell you what. Why don’t you come here, and I’ll tell you why we’re going to the 20th ward.”

“I already know why,” Juuzou replied warily, a pout on his lips. “We gotta hunt down some kinda ghoul. Like always.”

“Yes, but do you know about the ghoul we’re looking for?”

“Nope.”

“Then come here, and I’ll tell you.”

Finally, Juuzou plodded over and pulled his way up on to Shinohara’s desk, sitting on the edge facing Shinohara, dangling his feet until his slippers fell off. 

“Now, do you remember where the 20th Ward is?” Shinohara asked, sitting back and crossing his hands over his stomach. 

“Yes,” Juuzou replied with an unimpressed sort of sigh.

“Usually, that ward is pretty quiet. We’re not sure exactly why, but it seems that the ghouls there have created some sort of way to live beneath our radar, and the incidences of ghoul-related deaths are fairly low. Or, they _were_ low…”

“There’s more now?” Juuzou asked, looking at Shinohara with a bit more interest. 

“There are. And not only that, but we’re seeing evidence of multiple very strong ghouls in that one place.”

“Why all of a sudden?” Juuzou asked, leaning forward to rest his elbows on his thighs. 

“We’re not sure. That’s what I need you to help me figure out.” 

“So who are these ghouls?”

“Well,” Shinohara leaned forward as well, somewhat conspiratorial, “There’s the Binge-Eater, the Gourmet, and the Rabbit.” 

“What do they do?”

“The Binge-Eater eats huge numbers of young men, much more than it needs. The Gourmet chooses only very specific organs from specific people, and might be running a ghoul ‘restaurant’ of sorts…and the Rabbit killed a friend of mine, an investigator named Mado. We’re in charge of the Binge-Eater.” 

“What about the others?” 

“Well, we’re going with some other investigators: Houji and his partner, Takizawa. They’re going to take the Gourmet case. We’re meeting up with Amon, Mado’s former partner. He’s handling the Rabbit investigation, since it’s personal.” 

“Mr. Shinohara,” Juuzou asked, wiggling his toes, “Were you sad when Mr. Mado died?”

“Yes,” Shinohara said truthfully. “He was my first partner.” 

Juuzou hummed thoughtfully. “I’ve never been sad when someone died.”

“Well,” Shinohara replied, “Maybe you haven’t cared about someone who died before.”

“That’s true,” Juuzou smiled. “I don’t really care about anyone.”

“Maybe someday that will change.”

“Probably not. Anyway, how are we going to find the Binge Eater?”

“We’ll search for clues. That’s what investigators do, isn’t it?” 

“I guess.”

“Juuzou, there’s something else.”

“What?”

“Well, it seems like some of the ghouls are organizing in the 11th ward. They’ve killed and driven out all of the CCG investigators in that area, and there might come a time soon where we’re required to fight them.”

“That sounds so exciting!” Juuzou exclaimed, kicking his feet harder. “But Mr. Shinohara…”

“Yes?”

“I think I’ll need something better than that little knife you gave me.”

Shinohara pretended to consider this for the first time, rubbing his chin thoughtfully. “You know, Juuzou, there are strict rules about rank 3 investigators and quinques. I think you’re going to need to work very hard and get yourself promoted.”

Juuzou deflated, falling back onto Shinohara’s desk and scattering his pens. “I hate rules,” he sighed mightily. “And work.”

Just then, a knock sounded at the door. Juuzou jumped to his feet, balanced in the edge of the desk, and did a flip off of it, landing nimbly on his feet. “Coming!” he yelled rather unnecessarily; he was only three steps away from the door, anyway. He opened it with flourish, his eyes widening at the large-framed investigator before him. 

“Woah,” he said softly. “Who are you?”

“Speak of the devil,” Shinohara laughed. “Houji, how are you?”

“Doing well,” the man replied, smiling at Juuzou, “You must be Shinohara’s new partner. I’ve heard about you.”

Juuzou smiled at him, openly pleased. “Really? I’ve heard about you! Mr. Shinohara says you’ll be investigating the Gourmet!” 

“That’s right,” Houji confirmed. “And you’ll be looking for the Binge-Eater. I hope you’ve trained well, Juuzou. The Binge-Eater is a dangerous and powerful ghoul.”

“It wont be a problem,” Juuzou sniffed, stepping back and crawling up onto Shinohara’s desk. “I killed a lot of ghouls in the 24th Ward.”

“That he did,” Shinohara laughed. “Arima was quite impressed.”

Houji raised a brow. “Well, that’s quite a distinction for a rank 3 investigator! Congratulations, Juuzou.” 

“Thank you!” Juuzou replied, chest puffed out. “Don’t you think I should be given a real quinque then, Mr. Houji?”

Houji laughed. “I suppose Shinohara would know better than myself.”

Juuzou frowned.

“Anyway, I just came by to say Takizawa is out running errands. Are you up for a little friendly sparring, Shinohara?”

Shinohara grimaced and rubbed the back of his neck. “I’m not in good form today…but Juuzou…”

Juuzou jumped up off the desk and stood up very straight. “I will train with you, Mr. Houji!” He called out, hands clasped behind his back. 

Houji looked down at Juuzou, at his slight frame, the red stitching that spanned his arms and peppered his eye and lip, and shrugged. 

“What do you think, Shinohara?”

“Sounds like a great idea to me,” Shinohara shrugged. “But don’t go easy on him.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it,” Houji replied, smiling at Juuzou. “You think you’re up to going against an Associate Special Class, Rank 3 Juuzou?”

“Yep!” Juuzou replied, grinning at Shinohara. 

“We’ll be in the gym, then,” Houji nodded to Juuzou, and Juuzou practically danced out the door. 

“I’ll come down in a bit,” Shinohara smiled. “And, Houji…”

“Yes?”

“Don’t underestimate him.”

***

Nearly an hour had passed before Shinohara made his way down to the training gym. It was a great facility, outfitted with mats and practice quinques, weight machines, climbing ropes and walls, and other challenging equipment. It was a place where hand-to-hand combat could be practiced as well as physical endurance, and it was a place that Shinohara had taken advantage of many times, often with Iwaccho. Walking about the wards and investigating ghoul activity could dull the senses and reflexes, and it was vital that investigators stay on their game. 

Thirty feet above the gym, a track ran around the perimeter of the room, allowing investigators to run laps without endangering themselves or getting underfoot in the sparring area. It was there that Shinohara went, hoping to be able to watch Juuzou sparring with a new partner without being detected. When he arrived, however, he realized that he wasn’t the only one attracted to the prospect of watching their training unfold. A small crowd of investigators had gathered to look over the edge of the running track, leaning on the rails, attention raptly fixed on the scene below them. Shinohara found a space where he could lean on the railing, and took in the sight below. 

Houji had traded his sportcoat and tie for a t-shirt and loose athletic pants. He was barefoot and dripping with sweat, his hair mussed and falling into his eyes. His stance was loose but defensive, hands held at chest-height, feet a little more than shoulder-width apart. Before him, Juuzou crouched on the ground, low and grinning, waiting. His unruly white hair was pulled back into a small bun, wisps of it flying around his face. He wore a dark tank top and Shinohara’s too-large pants, rolled up to the knees. 

“This kid is incredible,” one of the investigators next to him murmured.    
“I know,” Shinohara crossed his arms over his chest and waited, watching. The moment broke, and the two bodies before him sprung into action almost simultaneously, each moving so fast that it was almost impossible to keep track of them. Houji lunged forward, but it was a feint, his leg dropping to sweep at Juuzou, who had already launched himself straight up into the air. From that crouching position, he was able to fly over Houji’s head in a perfect flip, his pale, slender feet coming straight down toward Houji’s back. Houji managed to dodge out of the way just in time, Juuzou’s feet grazing his side before hitting the mat lightly. Juuzou let out a peel of laughter, but Houji was already hurtling toward him again, so fast and precise that Juuzou was cut off mid-giggle, slipping around Houji’s open-palm hit and skittering off to the side. Houji was relentless, hands and feet flying in a series of kicks and punches, but Juuzou evaded each one, his grin almost splitting his face in two. 

“Just one hit!” Juuzou yelled out, dancing away from a well-placed kick just before it would have connected. “Just one hit! You can do it, Mr. Houji!” 

But Houji was tiring, Shinohara could tell. 

“He hasn’t landed a hit yet?” Shinohara asked the investigator next to him. 

“Not one,” the investigator confirmed, “But neither has the kid.”

“Impressive,” Shinohara replied. As an Associate Special Class, Houji should have been more than a fair match for Juuzou. Yet despite Houji’s speed and strength, Juuzou was faster, and had greater agility. The result was a stunning display. Houji ran past one of the training quinques and grabbed it up. Seeing this, Juuzou grabbed one of his own, laughing even harder. 

Armed with a quinque, Houji was even more in his element. He swung and stabbed with unbelievable precision, Juuzou escaping his attacks by centimeters. For Juuzou, the quinque became something between a weapon and a fifth limb; he used it to propel his jumps higher, swipe at Houji’s feet, and as a fulcrum to swing his body at Houji. The fight went on with gasps and yells from the spectators that grew so loud, Shinohara was reminded of the time he’d taken Iwaccho to watch see a wrestling match. 

It happened all at once, Houji feinting with the quinque, then catching the dodging Juuzou square in the torso with his heel. Juuzou tumbled across the mat with a little yell, then laid there, motionless. The gym was silent, everyone waiting for him to spring back up, to laugh, to move, but there was nothing. 

Shinohara sprang into action, running down the stairs two at a time until he made it to the lower level. He ran across the mats toward Juuzou’s limp form, not caring that he was still wearing his shoes. He dropped to his knees next to Juuzou and spoke the boy’s name softly, then a bit louder. For several terrible, silent seconds, no one moved. Shinohara felt something twist up inside him, his mind spinning, full of white noise. 

Then, Juuzou breathed. It was a great hiccuping breath, as if he’d just been pulled from the water after nearly drowning. Shinohara laughed with relief, and found Juuzou laughing with him. Houji was there all at once, apologizing, muttering something about a solar plexus which Juuzou laughed away. 

“That was _awesome_!” Juuzou cried out, pushing himself up from the mats. “Mr. Shinohara! When did you get here?”

Shinohara shook his head. “I’ve been here for a bit, for long enough, anyway. Aren’t you hurt, Juuzou? Getting winded is painful.”

“Nope!” Juuzou replied with a grin, holding his hand out to Houji. “I don’t feel pain.”

Houji shook his small hand vigorously, sweat still dripping from his face and hair. “Juuzou, you’re a worthy opponent!” He said with a smile. “It’s never taken me so long to land a hit before.”

Juuzou beamed. 

“Are you sure you’re not in pain, Juuzou?” Shinohara asked, still concerned. 

“Nope! Now that I can breathe I feel great!”

“Sorry about that,” Houji said, but a smile still spread across his features. “Takizawa could learn a thing or two from you.”

Shinohara laughed. “Look at that, Juuzou, maybe you could be a teacher.”

“No thanks!” Juuzou shrugged. “But that was fun! Can we do this again, Mr. Houji?”

Houji laughed, rubbing the back of his hand over a sweat slicked forehead. “Maybe so. But not today…or tomorrow, for that matter.”

“Okay,” Juuzou assented, shrugging. “I can train with Mr. Shinohara instead.” 

“And you will,” Shinohara smiled and patted his back. “Now get cleaned up. We’re going home.”

***

That night, Shinohara cooked for them both. It was just a simple curry, but Juuzou ate it up with gusto, chasing pieces of meat and potatoes around his plate with his chopsticks. Afterwards, Shinohara donned rubber gloves and set to washing the dishes, charging Juuzou with the drying despite his protestations. As they washed and dried, Shinohara felt a question pushing at the back of his mind, one he’d had for awhile. As he finished, removed his gloves, and watched Juuzou dry the last pan, he decided to voice his query. 

“Juuzou,” he started. “Can I ask you about something?”

“Mmmmhmmmmm,” Juuzou replied, drying the pot meticulously. 

“When you say that don’t feel any pain, what do you mean?”

“Ummm,” Juuzou stopped, looked up at him with a puzzled expression. “I just mean that I don’t feel pain! When things happen, I don’t feel them.”

“What kinds of things?”

“Like uhhhh….like my stitches!”

“So when you put the needle through your skin, you don’t feel anything?”

“Well, I feel….something. But it doesn’t hurt.” 

Shinohara’s mind was spinning with questions. What was it that Juuzou felt? Was it dulled out, like topical anesthesia? Did he feel everything in that dulled-out way? Could he feel pleasure? 

“My turn!” Juuzou cried out with a grin. “I have a question too!”

“Yes?” Shinohara said distractedly, still lost in his thoughts. 

“Are you a homosexual?”

Shinohara’s eyes widened and he stared straight at Juuzou, all of his previous thoughts quite suddenly silenced. It had been so long since he’d had this conversation, and he wasn’t sure what made Juuzou suspect him, or what had made him ask right now, of all times. Shinohara opened his mouth to reply, the world moving in slow motion around him, his gaze fixed on Juuzou’s wide, curious eyes, his mind spinning. 

It wasn’t that he was afraid, per se, of anyone being aware of his…well, preferences. However, it wasn’t really something that he discussed, especially not with fellow investigators at the CCG. No one had ever told him not to talk about it, but they didn’t have to. Shinohara knew better. No one had ever asked him about his romantic relationships, either, nor questioned his lack of a family or wife. No one said a word, truth be told, and in another life, such inattention had made him feel rather lonely. As a younger man, he’d nearly brought it up to the investigators that he considered friends, but somehow, he never managed to do so. Eventually, he just got used to talking about other things, got used to smiling when the other men would talk about their girlfriends or wives or children, got used to laughing and nodding and slapping people on the back without ever mentioning the men he gave himself to.

He’d never thought that it was so bad…no one treated him poorly or talked badly about him. Yet he’d gone months without even speaking to a man in an intimate way, even longer without hooking up, and his last serious partner had left him years ago. But that was his own fault, of course. He was getting old. Busy. Tired. He was past his prime.

“Why do you ask?”

Juuzou hummed, placed a slim pale finger to his lips, seemed deep in thought. “Well, you live here by yourself and you don’t have a wife or a girlfriend. Also I found videos on your computer and there were these men and…”

“Juuzou,” Shinohara called out, scrambling to think of something to say. He could feel his face going cherry red. “You shouldn’t be playing on my computer like that.”

Juuzou huffed. “You were out drinking, and I was bored.” 

Shinohara had never regretted a night of drinking more. 

“Anyway,” Juuzou went on, “You still didn’t answer.”

“Yes,” Shinohara finally sighed out. “But it’s not…don’t talk about it with other people, okay? It’s a private thing.”

“Why?” Juuzou asked, tilting his head to the side. “Is it a secret?”

“Kind of,” Shinohara replied, sighing and rubbing the back of his neck. “It’s just not…..a good thing to talk about with people, if someone asks you not to.”

Juuzou nodded and grinned. “Okay! I will _only_ talk to you about it.”

“That’s good,” Shinohara smiled at him. “Talking to me about it is okay.”

“Okay,” Juuzou said, “Then tell me how you found out.”

“Ahh,” Shinohara walked into the living room, Juuzou close behind him. “I was young. And I got a crush on a boy, so I kissed him.”

“Did he kiss you back?”

“He did,” Shinohara sat down on the couch, and Juuzou crawled up next to him. 

“Why did you like him?”

“Because we had the same favorite show, and I thought he was beautiful. Young love doesn’t take much, I suppose.”

Juuzou contemplated this quietly for a moment, then frowned. 

“Mr. Shinohara, how come you don’t have a boyfriend now?”

“I just…haven’t met anyone in awhile,” Shinohara shied away from the question, turning on the television instead to distract Juuzou’s attention. 

“I don’t have a boyfriend either,” Juuzou mused absently, momentarily distracted by a commercial with a talking dog and cat. 

Shinohara felt something rise up within him, some unbidden emotion that he didn’t care to quantify. It was nothing. It had been some time since he discussed matters of sex and dating, and Juuzou didn’t have a sense of boundaries. That feeling must have been concern, then, perhaps nervousness, because he couldn’t predict what Juuzou would ask next. It was embarrassment over the porn on his computer. It was all of those things, surely. What else would it be? 

He hummed back a non-reply to Juuzou, pretended desperately to watch TV. The commercial had bled into another, but now the show was coming back on. It was Juuzou’s favorite, and Shinohara was sure that the conversation would end there. 

“Anyway, I can’t have a boyfriend,” Juuzou continued. 

“You can’t?” Shinohara asked, turning to look at Juuzou, who had curled in on himself at the end of the couch. He had his knees pulled up tightly to his chest his body curled over itself, his great eyes cast down toward his toes. He didn’t seem amenable to eye contact, and eventually Shinohara gave up and stared at the screen again. As if by magic, Juuzou began to speak again. 

‘My mama wanted me to be a girl. But I’m a boy.” 

Shinohara tried to sneak a glance at him, but he stopped talking again. Shinohara stared straight ahead. 

“I thought maybe something happened to you, too, I thought that’s why you didn’t have any boyfriends.” 

“Oh,” Shinohara replied, at a loss. He remembered Juuzou’s mangled young body, and a shudder passed through him. What had been done to him…even now, the memory of his scars was fresh in Shinohara’s mind. It seemed trite to compare his anxieties with Juuzou’s tragedies. “No, nothing happened to me, really, I just…had trouble meeting anyone that I wanted to…well, being an investigator is tough work! I just didn’t really have time…” he let the sentence drop off with a shrug. Juuzou’s eyes were wide and bloodshot. He’d been staring at a small freckle on his big toe for several minutes now. Shinohara reached over, tentatively at first, then with purpose. His hand fell on Juuzou’s back, looming large on that small expanse. He rubbed circles there, still staring straight ahead though the characters on the television were swimming in and out of focus. His thoughts had strayed far from the program. 

Juuzou’s breath was coming in short, shallow bursts, but as Shinohara rubbed large circles into his back, he felt Juuzou’s breathing even out slowly, steadily. Then, as if nothing had transpired at all, Juuzou turned to look up at him with great, shining eyes, and asked, “Tomorrow you’re gonna spar with me, right?” 

Shinohara laughed. “Right.” 

Juuzou grinned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A very very very tremendous thank you to the lovely suzuyajesus for [the first fan art for this fic](http://suzuyajesus.tumblr.com/post/117153090779/based-on-this-beautiful-fic-by-tinyghoulproblem-i)!!!!!
> 
> Thank you everyone for being so very patient with me. School ends around mid June....chapters will come out much faster then!! I'm absolutely loving writing this fic, and things are getting ready to start ramping up as we enter the canon storyline. 
> 
> Anyway, I hope that everyone continues to enjoy!!! <3 Your comments and messages mean the world to me!
> 
> -E


	4. First Impressions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Remind me,” he finally said, “That we need to work on your first-impression skills.”
> 
> “My what?” Juuzou asked, brows knit. 
> 
> “Your first-impression skills…what you do when you meet people so that they will trust you and like you.”
> 
> Juuzou’s mouth turned into a frown. “I don’t care what people think of me though.”
> 
> “That’s fine,” Shinohara assured him. “But they care, and if you really want to be promoted and earn a quinque, you’ll have to learn to make a good impression.”
> 
> “Gross,” Juuzou muttered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello hello finally a Chapter 4! School is more or less done (finally!!!!!) so chapters should be coming out much more regularly now. 
> 
> Part of the first scene was heavily inspired by [this art](http://suzuyajesus.tumblr.com/post/112998786104/its-the-weekend-and-shinopapa-lets-juuzou-draw-on) by [suzuyajesus](http://suzuyajesus.tumblr.com/). Suzuyajesus and many other incredible artists are being featured in a summer-themed Tokyo Ghoul artbook called Solstice. If you are interested in beautiful arts, please [check it out](http://suzuyajesus.tumblr.com/post/121655524419/tkgsolstice-solstice-a-spring-summer-tokyo).
> 
> You can find me on tumblr at [tinyghoulproblem](http://tinyghoulproblem.tumblr.com/%22). All things related to this fic will be tagged with "Fic: Problem Child". Comments, kudos, and messages mean the WORLD to me! 
> 
> Enjoy!

It was a testament to the busyness of the week that Shinohara virtually forgot his conversation about sexuality with Juuzou. Switching to another district was a tremendously busy and consuming project, and without another investigator to share the paperwork burden with, Shinohara was completely overwhelmed with forms, permissions, and requests…not to mention his physical training, which was becoming the most consuming part of his day. Juuzou wanted hours, and whatever time Shinohara would devote to his physical training, it simply wasn’t enough. He wanted—perhaps needed—more, and though Shinohara thought that he would do well to “train” in paperwork, Juuzou had different ideas. 

Regardless, the week passed, and strangely, Juuzou seemed more subdued. Subdued by comparison, at any rate, to his usual manic disposition. He was still jumping about, practically climbing the walls wherever they went, but he’d refrained from attacking any civilians, and Shinohara hadn’t seen him seek the roof or hyperventilate in days. In Shinohara’s opinion, that alone showed progress, and he was proud of Juuzou for it. Proud enough, in fact, that he took his partner out for ice cream that weekend, and barely grimaced when Juuzou took a spoon of every topping in the toppings-bar and had to get an extra ice cream just to hold it all. 

Sunday, Shinohara had decided, would be for relaxing. Surprisingly, Juuzou seemed to acquiesce to this plan with few complaints, though Shinohara was sure that he would have dubbed it _boring_ straightaway. He resolved not to think about it too much. Instead, he sat on the couch, turned on the television, and read the paper. It wasn’t long before Juuzou sidled up to the couch and set something down beside it. He proceeded to crawl up on the cushions and plop down, cross-legged, staring at Shinohara intently. Determined to read his paper, Shinohara ignored his stares with practiced concentration. 

Finally, Juuzou asked, “Mr. Shinohara, why do you wear glasses when you read?”

“Because I’m old,” Shinohara shrugged, “And I can’t see the small print very well without them.”

Juuzou took that in, then stared at the paper. “Can you read all of the characters?” he asked, staring back up at Shinohara.

“Yes, I can. Can you?”

“No. Only some. I taught myself some with books, but I got tired of it.”

“Would you like me to teach you?”

Juuzou hummed thoughtfully, then nodded. 

“Alright then. I’ll teach you.”

“But not today, please.”

“Why not?”

“Because we’re _relaxing_.”

“Right,” Shinohara smiled. “I’d almost forgotten.”

He returned to reading his paper, but Juuzou wasn’t done. 

“Hey Mr. Shinohara?”

“Yes?”

“Can I stitch your arm?”

Shinohara frowned. “I think that would hurt, Juuzou.”

“Oh yeah…” Juuzou frowned. “But I brought all my threads!”

“Is that what you brought?” Shinohara asked, leaning over to look at the bag that Juuzou had set down beside the couch. It was black and looked quite heavy. He’d never seen Juuzou remove his stitches, but based on their cleanliness, he knew that it must have been a regular affair. “Maybe there’s something else that you could do?”

“Like what?” Juuzou asked, a pout resting in the corners of his lips. 

“Well, you could draw pictures on my arm instead.”

“Really?” Juuzou asked, eyes wide. “Anything I want?”

“Sure,” Shinohara shrugged. 

Juuzou hopped up and dashed away, and Shinohara could hear him rummaging about in the kitchen. Finally, he emerged with a black marker and a grin on his face. “Okay! I’m ready!”

“Okay,” Shinohara nodded and went back to his paper, but extended his left arm toward Juuzou. Juuzou took hold of his wrist with slender fingers, uncapped the sharpie with his teeth, and began to draw. 

Shinohara had no idea how he would get all of this marker off of his arm before work on Monday, but regardless, there was something soothing in the feeling of it—the warmth of Juuzou’s hand on his wrist and arm, the cool tip of the marker pressing into his skin. Juuzou hummed softly, happily. Juuzou moved over and around his arm, switching positions rather than trying to twist his arm about. Occasionally he would murmur softly to himself, giggle, or poke his tongue out in concentration. Shinohara stole glances at him now and again, shocked at how peaceful this feeling was. Juuzou laid under his arm like Michelangelo, giggling to himself as he drew, kicking his feet up in the air. 

It struck him quite suddenly; a warmth in his chest, a desire, a craving. He wanted to occupy that space forever, that moment, the soft drone of the television, the quiet strains of Juuzou’s humming, the warm hands on his arm. He never wanted it to end. 

Though his arm was getting numb from holding it up, he could still feel Juuzou manipulating it. A moment later, his palm was resting against Juuzou’s cheek, and Juuzou was nuzzling into it like a cat. Shinohara barely breathed, barely looked at Juuzou. He didn’t want to disturb him. He didn’t want him to stop. Gradually, Juuzou put aside the marker and pushed himself up under Shinohara’s arm, pressed his face against Shinohara’s chest. Shinohara set down the paper and tightened his arm just a bit around Juuzou’s shoulders. 

“Why did your heart speed up just now?” Juuzou asked.

“I don’t know,” Shinohara replied. He hardly realized that he was lying. 

“Can I ask you something?” 

Shinohara felt his heartbeat spike again. 

“Sure.”

“Will you give me a quinque for our mission the the 20th ward?”

Shinohara laughed aloud. 

“You have to learn a lot before that,” he replied, rubbing Juuzou’s arm lightly with his hand. “And you have to get a promotion.”

“Then I will for sure,” Juuzou replied confidently, reaching one finger up to trace small patterns on Shinohara’s chest. “Will you help me though?”

“Of course,” Shinohara replied. “Whatever you need.”

***

The next day, they took an unfamiliar route, the two of them landing in the 20th ward, standing before a much smaller CCG headquarters than they were accustomed to. It was a fairly plain building, tall and grey, and upon seeing it, Juuzou wrinkled his nose. 

“This place looks boring,” he declared with a sniff. Shinohara frowned. 

“Well, it’s not really supposed to look exciting. It’s just the CCG headquarters.”

“It’s small.”

“Compared to what you’re used to, yes. But all of the satellite offices are small. In fact, this is one of the larger ones.”

“No way!”

“We couldn’t afford a big one in every district, you know.”

Juuzou frowned. 

“What are we doing today?”

“Well, I have to brief Amon and some of the others about our purpose in the 20th ward, and see if they have any useful evidence or information here on our Binge Eater.”

Juuzou hummed thoughtfully, then his eyes lit up, his face splitting into a grin. “I have an idea!” he announced. 

“What would that be?” Shinohara asked, bracing himself.

“You go do your boring stuff, and I’ll go look for the Binge Eater!”

Shinohara thought about it. He was really quite fond of Juuzou, but his presence might be…distracting during a briefing, especially since he’d heard all of the information before. Shinohara could imagine it now—he’d be forced to buy half the vending machine just to keep Juuzou moderately well-behaved. It wasn’t the best first impression to make. 

“Remind me,” he finally said, “That we need to work on your first-impression skills.”

“My what?” Juuzou asked, brows knit. 

“Your first-impression skills…what you do when you meet people so that they will trust you and like you.”

Juuzou’s mouth turned into a frown. “I don’t care what people think of me though.”

“That’s fine,” Shinohara assured him. “But they care, and if you really want to be promoted and earn a quinque, you’ll have to learn to make a good impression.”

“Gross,” Juuzou muttered. “But anyway, for now, can I go?”

Normally, it would have been completely out of the question. Juuzou going after a highly rated ghoul on his own, armed with barely more than a knife? Absolutely not. But the 20th ward was a quiet place, and Shinohara was beginning to suspect that the Binge Eater was already dead. Really, it might do Juuzou some good to get accustomed to these new surroundings, and it would definitely do Shinohara good to get through these seemingly endless briefings without being interrupted. 

“Alright,” Shinohara finally assented. Juuzou grinned up at him wildly. “But you must do your best not to get into trouble.”

“Yeah okay,” Juuzou nodded. 

“Do you need anything? Money for food or anything else?”

“Nope!” Juuzou shook his head. “I can handle it myself!”

“Well,” Shinohara sighed, “I have my phone, so call me if you need anything.”

“I will!” Juuzou yelled out. “See ya!”

And with that, he was off. 

Shinohara found himself watching Juuzou bouncing away down the street at a lively gait. A part of him hoped that he was doing the right thing, and he was at least mostly sure that he was. Juuzou needed to be able to move about freely, after all. He had to learn sometime. Shinohara pushed his concerns away with a deep sigh, then strode into the CCG. He had a long day ahead. 

***

He spent his day in meeting after meeting, first with the higher ups, and then with other higher ups, and then phone conference calls, and then lunch with some of the 20th Ward regulars who he’d spent his academy days with. After lunch, he finally had a chance to see Amon again. He’d been worried about Amon, worried about how he was dealing with Mado’s death. It wasn’t Amon’s first real loss - Shinohara remembered Harima. He’d liked her very much. She was a good student, kind, and always cheerful. Shinohara had wondered at first why she had chosen such a difficult line of work, however, the first time he had the privilege of seeing her in action, he’d understood. Though her sunny exterior made her seem quite harmless, Harima was iron-willed and physically strong, taking on dangerous ghouls without even a flicker of fear. Shinohara had admired her tenacity and fearlessness—two qualities he’d worked very hard to cultivate within himself. 

Losing Harima had been a blow to all who’d known her, but Shinohara suspected that there had been some type of synergy between her and Amon that the rest of them weren’t aware of. When her will was read and her Doujima was left to Amon, Shinohara felt his suspicions had been confirmed. Of course his relationship with Kureo Mado was a bit different—Kureo had often told Shinohara that Amon looked up to him as the father he’d never had. It wasn’t surprising; Kureo’s methods were sickening at times, but he was sadistic toward the ghouls as a reaction to loss, and in an effort to stymy more loss. Kureo cared deeply for the people in his life, but for his daughter most of all. And it showed…Akira had grown up to be very lovely, very intelligent, and very deadly. Shinohara was as proud of her as if she was his own child, but he knew that no one would ever be as proud of her as Kureo had been. 

Despite his faults, Kureo had been the best father he knew how to be. And despite her faults, Mado had become an incredible investigator. Now, there was talk of placing her under Amon. Shinohara remembered Director Washuu’s words—that Amon needed to prove himself first—and felt slightly better. Amon was a good guy, but Shinohara wasn’t convinced that he was ready for a partner…especially one as headstrong as Akira Mado. Not that he would be telling Amon that, but the Director knew his opinion on the matter. 

After lunch, he returned to the headquarters with Houji and his subordinate, Takizawa, who seemed to be buzzing with excitement. 

“What’s got him so worked up?” Shinohara asked Houji out of his partner’s earshot.

“Oh,” Houji laughed. “He’s excited about meeting Amon.”

“Amon?” Shinohara asked, frowning thoughtfully. “Why?” 

“Well, it’s no secret that Mado thought highly of him, most people think he’s going to be advancing quickly.”

“He likes the movers and shakers, huh?”

Houji laughed softly. “Depends on who the mover and shaker is.”

“Fair enough,” Shinohara shrugged. 

“Speaking of,” Houji looked around, “I haven’t seen Juuzou all day. Where is he?”

Shinohara scratched the back of his neck. “Oh, well, you know Juuzou. He’s not the best in meetings, so I let him start investigating.”

“On his own?” Houji raised a brow. 

“Really, he’s just going to be getting his bearings, learning this part of the city. I don’t want him getting lost in the middle of a case. I’m sure he’ll be fine.”

“Of course he will,” Houji said, “But what about everyone else?”

Shinohara laughed, but the words resonated with him. Houji was being lighthearted, but Juuzou’s inhuman violence was a genuine concern. He wanted to trust that Juuzou knew better by now, but he’d only been training him briefly, and the incident with the landlord was just a few scant weeks behind them. 

“Well, anyway,” Houji led the way down a long hall. “Working with Amon will be good. He needs the help around here.”

“Seems like it,” Shinohara replied. “It sure is something to be back here, isn’t it?”

“Yeah,” Houji replied, “It is.” 

They had only been in the room for a few minutes when Amon arrived. After the initial introductions came another meeting, this time to bring Amon up to speed on everything that had been going on, on their assignments, and on the status of the current threats. Amon didn’t seem to be aware of any of it, but Shinohara wasn’t surprised. All of this information was strictly need-to-know, and the CCG defined that category very narrowly indeed. Just as they were finishing up their discussion, Shinohara’s phone rang. It was an unfamiliar number. His stomach dropped. 

“Oh, I have to take this,” he muttered, swiping across the screen. “Hello?”

“Hello, is this CCG Investigator Shinohara?” an unfamiliar voice squawked through the speaker. 

“Yes, it is.”

“This is officer Kobayashi from the 20th ward. I have someone here claiming to be an investigator. He doesn’t have an ID…and he doesn’t look like an investigator at all, but he has a weapon and it’s covered in blood. He told me that I could call you to confirm his identity.”

Shinohara grimaced. 

“Does he have stitches on his arm and face?

“Oh…well, yes, sir. He does.”

Shinohara sighed. “Then there’s no mistake. I’ll be right there.”

Amon looked confused, so Shinohara smiled at him. 

“It’s ‘him.’” Takizawa sighed. 

“Who?” Amon asked.

“The ‘Problem Child.’”

“That would be my partner,” Shinohara stepped in, clapping Takizawa on the shoulder. “It seems the police found him doing some investigating, but he forgot his ID. I’m going to go pick him up from the station.”

“May I join you?” Amon asked. Shinohara wondered why he wanted to join, but he shrugged. It might be good to introduce Amon to Juuzou now. Anyway, he could use the company. 

“Sure, if you want to split cab fare.”

Amon smiled. “That’ll be fine.”

“Then lets go. See ya later Houji, Takizawa…”

“Good luck!” Houji called out with a laugh. 

“Why do we need luck?” Amon asked, eyeing Shinohara. 

“Oh, you know Houji, he’s teasing.”

“Why do they call him…Problem Child?”

“Oh, Juuzou?” Shinohara shrugged. “He has…his own way of doing things, you know?”

“Is he really a child?”

“No, he’s nineteen, but he doesn’t look his age.”

“Nineteen is young.”

“So is twenty-five.”

“I’m twenty-six, now.”

“Oh,” Shinohara smiled at him. “Forgive me.”

A cab pulled up to the curb and they got in. Shinohara gave the driver the address and then sat back. 

“Can I ask you something?” Amon looked at Shinohara as the cab pulled into traffic. 

“Shoot.”

“Have you read Mr. Mado’s will?”

“I have,” Shinohara confirmed. “But you know I can’t reveal anything until the CCG has unsealed it for you.” 

“I know.”

“So?”

“I was just curious.”

“If that’s why you came with me, its going to be a boring ride.”

“No,” Amon protested. “I’ve always looked up to you…you’re an amazing teacher. I thought we could catch up a bit. Maybe I could run some stuff past you.”

“Thanks,” Shinohara smiled. “You can run anything past me that you like.”

Amon proceeded to talk to him about his quinque, varying types of technique, and his concerns about the Rabbit ghoul. Shinohara did his best to listen and respond, but his mind was firmly fixed on Juuzou. Why had his knife been covered in blood? Had he been injured, surely the officer would have mentioned it. Then again, if he thought Juuzou was some sort of criminal, he might not have found it necessary. Further, leaving Juuzou in the care of an authority figure—especially one who wasn’t charmed by his rather unique sensibilities—wasn’t a good plan in any scenario. 

“Are you alright, Shinohara?” Amon asked. From his tone, Shinohara could tell he’d missed something. 

“Oh, sorry. I’ve been in meetings all day. You know how it is.”

“I do,” Amon smiled. “There is one more thing, though, if you don’t mind.”

“Sure,” Shinohara shrugged. They were almost there.

“Did you read my report on the Eyepatch Ghoul?”

Shinohara hummed. “You said he didn’t want to hurt you, right?”

Amon frowned. “No, he didn’t want to kill me. I still have a scar left in my shoulder…hurting me wasn’t really a concern.”

“I wonder why he has one eye covered?” Shinohara asked.

“I’m not sure, but it did seem like a strange mask. I’ve never seen one like it before.”

“We can keep an eye out for him while we look for the Binge Eater. I’ll mention it to Houji too.”

Amon nodded. “Thank you, Shinohara.”

The cab pulled up outside the police station, and Shinohara got out, mentally steeling himself for whatever was to come. He pushed own the door, fixing a smile on his face and lifting his badge. His gaze fell on Juuzou immediately, sitting there without a care in the world, dangling his slipper from his toes and looking like he couldn’t be more bored if he tried. 

“Um, hi,” Shinohara looked at the officer. “I’m Shinohara, from the phone call earlier? I came to pick him up.”

“Oh,” the officer looked shocked. “You came!”

“Of course he did,” Juuzou huffed. “Didn’t I tell you that he would?”

“I’m sorry,” the officer stammered. “He didn’t seem like a part of the CCG to me.”

“Don’t apologize,” Shinohara shook his head. “You’re right to question someone like him.”

“Yeah,” the officer said, bolstered. “And he had a knife, and it was covered in blood. Also, he just told me he was a ghoul investigator and gave me your number. I didn’t know what else to do.”

“Shiiiiinohaaaraaa,” Juuzou whined, “I’ve told you so many times that this knife is too small. I can’t carry it well, and even a guy like this doesn’t believe me.” 

“Well, what were you doing, Juuzou? Where were you?” Shinohara made show of eyeing him sharply, but he patted his head anyway. 

“What do you mean? I thought…” Juuzou tugged on Shinohara’s sleeve. “I was just doing what we said.”

“I don’t know about that,” Shinohara replied, hardly suppressing his smile. “You’re going to have to make a full report.

“A report?” Juuzou gasped, but he was smiling up at Shinohara now. 

“Man oh man,” the officer sighed, sitting down with a huff. 

“What?” Juuzou muttered, eyes shifting over to the officer. 

Shinohara had thought that he had the situation under control. Juuzou seemed calm, he was smiling, they were bantering in their own way. But in the moment that Juuzou looked over at the officer, something in his countenance changed. His eyes went half closed for a moment, his sparse brows drew down, and he frowned. A ball of dread began to form in Shinohara’s stomach, but before he could speak, Juuzou had twined his arms around the man’s neck. 

“There’s no ‘man oh man,’” Juuzou said, and Shinohara heard the danger in his tone. 

“Juuzou, let’s…” Shinohara started, but Juuzou went on.

“You promised me that you would apologize, didn’t you? I’m a real investigator, you know that now…so please apologize as you said you would.”

“Well, look, don’t you think that you’re a little misleading?” The officer asked, body stiff and unyielding at the unexpected contact. “I was wrong about you, but I think you’re at fault here. Someone working for the CCG should look more respectable.”

Shinohara broke in, “Look, I’ve told him that before so maybe you should just stop now, huh?”

But it was too late. Juuzou’s eyes were wide and bloodshot, and before anyone knew what was happening, he’d forced his tongue into the man’s ear and was making terrible sucking noises. 

_What the fuck?_ Shinohara thought desperately, eyes going wide. 

Within seconds, the man was screaming, and Juuzou was hopping away from him. Juuzou spat out a bloody mass, and Shinohara gasped. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Amon putting his hand over his mouth. 

What a first impression.

“Just as I suspected!” Juuzou called out, holding his nose mockingly. “Your ears are rotten. I don’t think you need this either! I’ll dispose of it!” With that, he crushed the bloody mess under one slipper. 

Finally, Shinohara snapped into action. “Juuzou!” he yelled out. Juuzou turned and looked up at him with wide, bloodshot eyes. 

_Am I a good boy?_ Juuzou’s words from the whack-a-mole operation popped back into Shinohara’s mind. Shinohara shook his head and clenched his teeth together.

“Come here! I’m going to have to fill out another compensation form.” Shinohara grabbed at Juuzou and pulled him away from the screaming man, while Juuzou made a show of struggling.

“Ow, ow, Mr. Shinohara! You’re hurting me!”

“No, I’m not…” Shinohara muttered. He knew Juuzou didn’t feel pain. 

“Oww ow ow ow!” Juuzou’s voice betrayed him—he sounded practically gleeful. Then his eyes landed on Amon. “By the way, are you Mr. Amon?”

He didn’t wait for Amon to reply, which was probably a good thing, as Amon was still staring at him, wide-eyed. “I’m Suzuya Juuzou, Mr. Shinohara’s underling! Nice to meet you!!” 

When Amon didn’t reply, Juuzou looked up at him and grinned. “Wow, you’re huge! That must be nice!”

“Juuzou,” Shinohara butted in, rubbing his hand over his face. “Please return to headquarters while I get this sorted out.”

“I want to stay here,” Juuzou declared, pointing his nose up in the air.

Shinohara sighed heavily. “Alright, then please try to stay quiet for a bit, okay?”

Juuzou frowned and slumped over to a chair in the corner of the room. Shinohara stared after him for a minute, then pulled out his phone. This was going to require some creative explanation. 

***

At Shinohara’s urging, Amon went off on his way. Phone calls were made, the officer was taken away in an ambulance, and paperwork was started. Shinohara knew this was going to be another headache, but he was more concerned with the fact that Juuzou had harmed a human, again, without even a speck of remorse. How was he to handle this? He’d seen a side of Juuzou that was different, a softer side. He’d argued for Juuzou’s inclusion as an investigator because he’d known, from the beginning, that Juuzou was a victim of cruelty and violence, and that his own cruelty and violence stemmed from those wounds. Still, he wasn’t a doctor, he wasn’t proficient in handling trauma, and even if he managed to get a doctor involved, he doubted that Juuzou would cooperate. 

It was incredibly difficult. Part of him felt discouraged, as if he would never be able to adequately handle this, as if he had been wrong about Juuzou’s ability to overcome his past. But another part of him—the louder part of him, in the end—still believed in the impossible. He just needed to figure out how to access the part of Juuzou that could still be reached. He felt as though he’d managed it, a few times…but he needed to figure out how to keep his finger on that pulse. 

They finally left the station, Juuzou running circles around him, rife with manic energy. 

“Juuzou,” he started, but Juuzou ignored him, practically climbing up the walls. “Juuzou, listen to me!”

His tone must have been sufficiently agitated, because Juuzou finally turned and stared at him. 

“How many times do I have to tell you?” he asked, exasperated. “I let you dress however you like, I let you go off investigating on your own, but the only thing…the _only thing_ I can’t tolerate is you hurting other humans.”

Juuzou huffed and turned, but Shinohara caught his arm. “Humans are fragile, Juuzou! Even if he held you at the station, he didn’t do anything wrong…you forgot your ID, and you had a quinque covered in blood!”

Juuzou muttered something softly. 

“What?” Shinohara asked, leaning closer. 

“I don’t care what happens to people who piss me off,” Juuzou said, louder this time. “Even if he died, I wouldn’t give a shit! I don’t understand why you’re yelling at me! I don’t understand why you like him so much! I don’t understand why you’re sticking up for him!”

Juuzou was shaking, just barely, but Shinohara could see it. Something in him softened. He’d almost forgotten it for a moment, but now he remembered—Juuzou’s actions may have been inhuman at times, but Juuzou himself was human. Achingly human. Shinohara crouched down before him. 

“I’m not standing up for him,” he muttered softly. “I don’t like him, it’s that I’m worried about you, Juuzou. That was a violent thing that you did…did he do something that upset you so much?”

Juuzou looked down and bit his lip. “It’s those eyes,” he said finally, softly. “They look at me with those eyes, just like at the Academy. All those people who pretend to be good. They look at me with those eyes while they talk about me. And I…I just…want them to die.”

Shinohara reached out to him again, but instead of grabbing at his arm, he took Juuzou’s small hand in his own and tugged him closer. They were almost eye to eye when Shinohara crouched down like this, but Juuzou could look down at him. 

“Okay,” he said. “I’ve got it.”

Juuzou looked at him expectantly. 

“Next time you want to hurt someone, whatever you want to do to them, you do it to me first.”

Juuzou’s eyes went wide. 

“Is that okay?” Shinohara asked. He wasn’t sure what had possessed him to make such an offer, but there it was. A part of Shinohara felt concerned—he didn’t want his own eardrum sucked out. But another part of him thought that if he could just make Juuzou transfer that anger onto someone who was kind to him, it would stop him long enough to keep him from lashing out. 

“Yeah, okay,” Juuzou finally replied. 

“Really?” Shinohara asked, smiling up at Juuzou. 

“Yeah,” Juuzou returned his smile. 

“Okay, then it’s a deal.”

All at once, Juuzou wrapped his arms around Shinohara’s neck and clung tightly to him. Shinohara hesitated at first, then wrapped Juuzou up in his arms. 

They stayed like that for some time, though for how long, Shinohara couldn’t be sure. Finally, he murmured, “Okay, ready to go home?”

“Yeah,” Juuzou whispered back. “Let’s go home.”

***

“So was it fun, being on your own out there?” Shinohara asked. They were sitting on the couch, slurping noodles out of take-out boxes, the TV on low for a commercial break. 

Juuzou shrugged. “Well, some ghouls tried to eat me.”

“What?” Shinohara asked, almost dropping his chopsticks. “Is that why your quinque was bloody?”

“Yeah,” Juuzou nodded. “They thought I would make a nice snack, so I cut them up.” 

Shinohara wasn’t sure how to respond. He hadn’t expected Juuzou to be attacked—had he known that would happen, he wouldn’t have let Juuzou go out alone. Yet, here they were, safe and relatively sound. He reminded himself to breathe, reminded himself that Juuzou had gotten through it just fine. 

“You know,” he finally started, “Very few Rank 3 junior investigators have killed as many ghouls as you have.”

“Does that mean I can have a bigger quinque now?” Juuzou asked, eyes hopeful.

“No,” Shinohara laughed, “But it does mean that we need to start working on teaching you a few things about ghouls.”

Juuzou moaned and flopped back on the couch, barely managing not to spill his food. “I know everything I need to know about ghouls,” he pouted. “I know how to kill them and I’m good at it. Even Mr. Arima says so.”

“Arima is right,” Shinohara nodded, “But there’s more to getting a promotion than that. And you can’t get a quinque until you’ve been properly promoted.”

“What do I need to get promoted?”

“Well, it’s a little different in your case, since you got in through the back door, so to speak.”

“Different how?”

“Well, you’ve never taken the exam.”

“So?”

“You have to take the exam to be promoted.”

Juuzou sighed, slurped up more noodles, and chewed noisily. “Is it hard?”

“Yeah, I mean…most investigators attend the Academy for a few years to learn all of the information.” 

“That sounds boring,” Juuzou huffed.

“Maybe, but wouldn’t it be worth it to get your quinque?”

“I guess,” Juuzou shrugged. “I mean if I have to do it to get a quinque.”

“There’s other stuff too, stuff that has to be done.”

“Like what?” 

“Well, you need to kill a ghoul.”

“I’ve already killed a bunch!”

“Yeah, but you have to be able to get its kagune so that Dr. Chigyou can turn it into a quinque.” 

“Hmmm…” Juuzou went quiet, focusing only on his noodles. Shinohara let it go. He’d planted the idea, that was all that he could do for now. 

It had been a long day. Shinohara eventually found himself dozing off, and figured it was time to head toward bed. He gathered up the now-empty take-out containers and tossed them in the trash. As he walked back to his room, he realized that the couch was now empty, though some game show was still playing on the television. Assuming that Juuzou had gone to bed, he turned off the TV and made his way to the bathroom.

Finally, teeth brushed and face washed, he walked into his room and started to unbutton his shirt. It was only when he hung up the shirt in his closet that he noticed a lump under his covers. 

“Juuzou?” he asked, tilting his head. 

“Hmmm?” Juuzou’s muffled hum came back to him as an answer. 

“Why are you in my bed?”

Juuzou slowly pulled back the covers, revealing his messy white hair, then his wide eyes. “Can I stay in here tonight?”

Shinohara opened his mouth to reply, then shut it again. A part of him protested, a smart voice in the back of his head whispering that sleeping in the same bed as his partner would put the clincher on his recent spate of unprofessional behavior. At the same time, Juuzou’s eyes were so expectant, and there was another part of him…a much greater part, perhaps, that wanted to say yes more than anything. Shinohara swallowed hard, his fingers pulling at the hem of his white undershirt. 

“You want to?” he asked. He was stalling, he knew that, but he wasn’t sure how else to react. 

“Mm-hmm,” Juuzou nodded vigorously. “I get lonely at night.”

Shinohara felt his heartbeat speed up, and frowned. “Uh…just…I’ll go change in the bathroom, then.”

“Why?” Juuzou asked, pulling the covers down further to expose his mouth. “I don’t care.”

“Uh, well, I just think…that would be better.”

Juuzou shrugged. “Okay, but does that mean I can stay?”

“Yeah,” Shinohara replied, gathering up pajama pants from a drawer in his closet. “Yeah, it’s fine.”

Juuzou beamed at him, and Shinohara scurried off to the bathroom. As he undid his belt and pulled off his slacks, he looked up at himself in the mirror. Was he wrong? Was this bad? He knew that Juuzou needed a better sense of his boundaries, and that he was the only one with enough patience to teach him what boundaries were and how to respect them. But at the same time, all that he could think about was the way strands of Juuzou’s messy hair had clung to his pillows, the way his body felt so small and warm when he curled into Shinohara on the couch, the way he’d pressed his ear to Shinohara’s chest, the way he dangled his slippers from the tips of his toes. 

Shinohara swallowed hard. He’d said yes to Juuzou because he wanted this, wanted to be closer to him. He hadn’t wanted to admit it…there was something inherently illicit about sharing a bed with your partner, no matter who suggested it in the first place. But if he really objected to it, he wouldn’t have said yes…would he? 

The pounding of his heart was the answer to his question. 

Wearing his undershirt and pajama pants, he emerged from the bathroom and made his way back to his room. This was fine. Juuzou was just lonely. It would be fine. Shinohara’s bed was large enough to comfortably accommodate them both. With a deep breath, Shinohara walked back into the room and hung up his slacks. Juuzou watched him, owl like, still snuggled down under the blanket. Shinohara climbed into bed, turned off the lamp, and laid down, somewhat stiffly, on his back. He usually slept on his side, but if he curled toward Juuzou, it could make things awkward. If he curled away from him, Juuzou might feel bad. This was the best he could do. 

It didn’t last, however. As soon as he was settled under the covers, Juuzou scooted over and wrapped his slender arms around Shinohara’s arm, then his legs around Shinohara’s leg. Shinohara swallowed. Juuzou was warm, like a little furnace. He was pressing his face into Shinohara’s arm with a quiet, contented hum. Shinohara squeezed his eyes shut and tried to clear his mind. 

Juuzou’s breathing evened out, slowed, his breath blowing warm over Shinohara’s arm. He was asleep, just like that. 

Despite his exhaustion, sleep didn’t visit Shinohara for quite some time.


	5. Article 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> That night, just as sleep began to overcome him, Shinohara felt Juuzou grab his arm and pull at him. Shinohara let himself roll over on his side, let Juuzou snuggle back into him like a spoon. He buried his nose in Juuzou’s fine hair, wrapped one arm around Juuzou’s chest, let the other one support his head. It had been so long since he’d held someone close like this, and Juuzou’s body felt so warm and small in his arms. He felt Juuzou let out a sigh of contentment, and he sighed as well. In his own way, Shinohara thought, Juuzou cared for him. Maybe he didn’t know it yet. Maybe he didn’t realize it. But he cared. Shinohara was sure of it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! New chapter! 
> 
> A few notes about canon references will be included at the end of this chapter. Thank you for all of your kind words and support! It really helps me to get feedback, so I super appreciate all of your kudos and comments. :) I hope that you all know that every person who reads, comments, bookmarks, subscribes, and etc means a lot to me, so thank you!
> 
> As always, you can find me at [tinyghoulproblem](http://tinyghoulproblem.tumblr.com/) on tumblr, and the fic tag is "fic: problem child". 
> 
> Enjoy!

The more he looked into the Binge Eater case, the more wary Shinohara became. No sign of the ghoul had been found in months, not a single kagune secretion or predation incident. Of course, that was in the 20th Ward, but none of the other wards had reported any sort of similar activity. It was as if the ghoul had disappeared entirely. Of course, that wasn’t out of the question. He knew for certain that the Binge Eater had not been killed by a CCG Investigator; their kills were all catalogued and checked against the database for existing evidence, so he would have known. But that didn’t change the fact that ghouls often killed one another; their kagunes were used as weapons just as often as hunting tools. As skilled as the CCG had become at eliminating ghouls, they were infinitely better at eliminating one another. There had once been talk among the special class investigators about using that to the advantage of the human population—starting a war between the ghouls wherein they would slaughter one another, waiting around for the aftermath and killing whoever was left. But it was determined that such a move would put human beings in a great deal of danger. And of course it begged the question…who would be left? How powerful would they be?

Shinohara wasn’t sure if it would be more or less dangerous than their current course of action, continuing to allow humans to be killed so that they could pick off ghouls one-by-one. From what he could tell, it was the comfort of the evil one knew, rather than the fear of the evil one didn’t know. They knew the costs, the risks, and the rewards of their current methods. They didn’t know…couldn’t know, really, what would happen if that method was to change. So on they trudged, investigating killings, analyzing kagune secretions, chasing down the ghouls one by one. It was still war, and it wore on them all the same.

In school, Shinohara had studied the history of warfare worldwide. If he’d learned anything from his studies, it was that both sides found themselves to be in the right, and that reducing the enemy to a set of evil traits was a coping mechanism that all soldiers used to make their work more bearable. It was the reason why he had always operated under the constraints of Article 13, Clause 2: cause no more suffering than was necessary. Most of the investigators received some pleasure from seeing ghouls suffer, but for Shinohara it was a grim business. He’d seen ghoul children crying for their parents, ghouls fighting for their friends…from what he’d observed, being a ghoul held all of the emotional complication of being a human. Unlike animals, ghouls had every faculty that humans had, and unambiguously. No, Shinohara would never be able to enjoy watching them suffer. 

And yet, he understood. After seeing friends, pupils, and partners die at the hands of ghouls, he understood why his fellow investigators despised them so. The CCG recruited directly from those who had been victimized by ghouls, and did so quite purposefully. An average human might flinch in the face of a kagune, but vengefulness was a powerful feeling. 

From what he could tell, Juuzou felt no particular vengefulness toward the ghouls. In fact, Juuzou seemed far more vengeful against humans, those who looked at him wrong or made him feel slighted. When it came to ghouls, he seemed to kill for pleasure. That alone concerned Shinohara…how was he to explain to his partner that pleasure shouldn’t—couldn’t, really—factor into this? He’d seen investigators destroyed by their desire to take pleasure in the extermination of ghouls. Juuzou was already on shaky ground, both mentally and emotionally. Now, Shinohara worried that he would be pushed over the edge by the demands of the job. 

Yet here they were, poring over CCG files together, Shinohara helping Juuzou with unfamiliar kanji as they searched for clues. There was a part of him—a large part, in all honesty—that was relieved to be out of the field, for now. Juuzou had behaved himself since the incident with the police officer, but Shinohara had learned not to let his guard down, at least not in reference to Juuzou’s interpersonal relations. He couldn’t deny that his guard was down in other areas; he’d woken up tangled in Juuzou’s limbs for the past two days, and he’d enjoyed the warmth of it far too much. Just that morning, he’d laid in bed five minute longer than he should have, just to watch Juuzou breathing through his small pink lips, just to watch the way his long lashes fluttered in his sleep. 

He was weak, now, in a way that he hadn’t anticipated. He knew the way that Juuzou’s skin smelled in the morning, and it was something he couldn’t stop himself from thinking about, even after five minutes in a cold shower. 

“What?” Juuzou asked, looking up from his file to stare back into Shinohara’s eyes. 

“Oh, uh,” Shinohara hadn’t realized that he’d been staring. “I was just wondering if you found anything.”

“No,” Juuzou shrugged, “And this is so boring, Mr. Shinohara. Please take me to do something else.”

“I can’t,” Shinohara replied with a shrug. “We have to know where we should be looking before we start investigating.”

“But how will we ever catch the Binge Eater if we’re stuck in this office eight hours a day? What if we get lazy? Don’t we need to train?” 

“We do, but this takes precedence right now.”

Juuzou huffed.

“Look, when we’re done looking through files, we can go to the training gym. The one here isn’t as good as the one in the First Ward, but it’ll do.”

Juuzou hummed, then grinned, “I have a better idea! Maybe instead of that, we can go out and kill some ghouls on the street!” 

“I don’t think so,” Shinohara shook his head. “The 20th Ward has its own investigators for that, and we’re not supposed to be stepping on any toes.”

“I think it’s okay to step on some toes,” Juuzou shot back, “It they aren’t moving fast enough.” 

“No,” Shinohara shook his head. “You have to be careful when you’re in someone else’s district.”

“Why?”

“Because sometimes, people become concerned, and then they may not be willing to help you.”

“Why are they concerned?”

“Because they think you may want something that belongs to them, like their job or their promotion.”

“Hmm. Well, I’m going to get a promotion on my own.”

“That’s right,” Shinohara replied with a smile. “But you better get used to all of this reading. You’re going to have to study quite a lot.”

Juuzou sighed. 

“How about we take a quick break, and get some doughnuts?”

“Yeah!” Juuzou yelled, grinning. “Let’s do it!”

***

Juuzou was becoming more independent. It was something that Shinohara noticed, though it was happening in stages, slowly. Ever since he’d been allowed to go off on his own on their first day in the 20th ward, he’d been going off alone more often. Sometimes briefly, leaving Shinohara to paperwork and phone calls in the mornings, and sometimes for longer stretches of time. It might have concerned Shinohara—and admittedly, he missed the days when Juuzou stayed so close by his side—but since their conversation about the police officer, Juuzou had been somewhat miraculously well-behaved. He hadn’t hurt a single civilian, at least, and as Shinohara saw it, that was marked progress. This morning was no exception. They’d come into the CCG together, but Juuzou had declared that he wanted breakfast. Shinohara didn’t have time to go anywhere, as he had to make a phone call before the day’s meeting, so Juuzou had wandered off on his own. 

“Just make sure you’re in the meeting room in an hour,” Shinohara had said, brows raised. 

“I know!” Juuzou had chirped back…and he hadn’t seen his partner since. 

Now, phone calls squared away, he made his way to the meeting room. It seemed he was the last to arrive—Amon, Takizawa, Juuzou, and Houji were waiting for him, Takizawa sporting a bloody nose. Shinohara snorted at the sight. 

“Hey Seidou, you see something good?” he asked with a laugh.

“No,” Takizawa muttered. 

“Well, let’s start the meeting,” Houji chimed in quickly. Shinohara nodded. His eyes travelled over to Juuzou, who was looking entirely innocent. Shinohara didn’t buy it, but he just raised a brow and shrugged. 

“Well,” he started, “First things first. We haven’t found any evidence of the binge eater in the past two months, at least not in this ward. Based on the idea that they may have moved along, I’ve contacted the other wards, and we’ll be getting their records later today. Just leave the investigation up to us.”

“Okay!” Juuzou chimed in with a grin. Shinohara smiled back at him. 

“The Gourmet’s activity has also dropped off,” Houji offered, looking down at his notes. “There’s been about half a month between attacks, and now, the person in charge of investigations has been preyed upon.” 

“Investigations of what?” Juuzou asked. 

“You know, the one who gathers all of the evidence at the scene and processes it…footprints, fingerprints, hair, fibers, and kagune secretions…he helped us know what ghoul was attacking, or whether it was a ghoul not yet named in our system. We’ve been looking at investigation files recently, Juuzou,” Shinohara explained patiently. The other investigators looked back and forth, and Shinohara smiled, though it was strained. Juuzou knew exactly what Investigators were…why was he asking? And now, of all times?

“Now, the most recent crime scene lacked evidence, mores than usual, but we do know that the Gourmet’s shoe size is a seven. With this information, we can work on tracking him,” Houji said. 

“Oh well, that’s nice, but Mr. Shinohara, please hurry up and give me a real quinque!” Juuzou had his scorpion out and began waving it about. Shinohara noticed the others cringing back, and he didn’t blame them. He smiled at Juuzou and rubbed the back of his neck. 

“No, Juuzou, your bikaku is a good match for the Binge Eater’s rinkaku,” Shinohara was speaking quietly, trying to placate Juuzou, but Juuzou sighed and rolled his eyes. 

“Even if that’s true, it doesn’t matter! This is just a scrap! I need a real weapon!” 

Shinohara saw Houji and Takizawa muttering, while Amon just looked at Juuzou with a wide-eyed, puzzled expression. 

“If I kill the Binge Eater I’ll get a new quinque, right?” Juuzou pressed, staring at Shinohara with wide eyes, “Right?”

“Yes, yes,” Shinohara sighed, “But we have other things to discuss. Amon…the Rabbit?” 

“Oh,” Amon said, tearing his eyes away from Juuzou’s spectacle. “Well, I’ve also been examining investigation files. At this time, the Rabbit’s kagune has not been used in any attacks since…since the last time. I’m going to keep looking into it though.”

“Good.” Shinohara nodded. “So does everyone have their goals in order?”

A series of affirmations filled the room, and Shinohara nodded firmly. “Then let’s get to it.”

The meeting broke up, with Houji and Seidou walking one way, and Juuzou another. Shinohara watched as Juuzou flipped his quinque around and threw it in the air, always managing to catch it by the handle. He frowned. 

“What’s wrong?” Amon asked, coming up to his side. Shinohara started slightly, then smiled at him. 

“Oh, it’s nothing. I just…have a feeling that the binge eater is already dead. I think…I think we’re chasing a ghost.” 

“Binge eater, binge eater,” Juuzou sang, walking away down the hall. Amon watched him for a moment, and so did Shinohara. 

“Maybe you are,” Amon shrugged. “But I believe in you, Shinohara. If that’s the case, I’m sure you’ll figure it out soon enough.”

“I hope so,” Shinohara nodded. “Good luck today, Amon. Work hard.”

“You too.”

***

“Juuzou,” Shinohara said, looking at his partner across a veritable mountain of files sent in from other wards. 

Juuzou hummed back in reply. 

“When we’re in meetings, you shouldn’t bring up things that are…off topic.”

“Like what?” Juuzou asked, but Shinohara saw a smirk in his eyes, in the corner of his lips. 

“You know you have to be promoted before you get a quinque, and you have to work hard to get promoted. We’ve talked about this.”

“Yeah, but I want one _now_ , and anyway how am I supposed to kill ghouls which such a little…useless…”

“Haven’t you killed plenty of ghouls already?”

Juuzou frowned. 

“Look, I understand that you want a quinque. But you’re going to need to be patient.”

“I _am_ being patient!” Juuzou practically yelled, slamming his hands down on the table. Shinohara raised a brow at him, and Juuzou sighed and crossed his arms. “I’m bored. I’m leaving,” he said. 

“Where are you going?”

“Out,” Juuzou called back, already halfway to the door. 

“Stay out of trouble,” Shinohara called after him.

Juuzou lifted one hand to wave, and then he was gone. Shinohara buried his face in his hands and sighed. He wasn’t sure why he’d expected something different—after all, Juuzou was still half-feral. Even though he curled his body up against Shinohara’s every night, even though he’d promised not to hurt any more civilians…or close enough to promised, anyway, Juuzou was still the Problem Child. And Shinohara knew that he needed a way to convince Juuzou that he would never get what he wanted unless he learned to follow at least some of the rules…at least the important rules. With a sigh, Shinohara went back to the files, and hoped that he wouldn’t get another unpleasant phone call from a police officer that found Juuzou “exploring.”

***

When he arrived home that night, Juuzou was already home. He could tell because every light in the house was on, and because he heard a series of somewhat worrying noises coming from the kitchen. 

“I’m home!” Shinohara called out, tossing his keys in their dish. 

“Yep!” Juuzou’s voice, distracted, floated in from the kitchen.

“What’re you up to?” Shinohara called back, untying his shoes and removing them.

“Uhhhhh just making dinner!”

“You’re making dinner?” Shinohara asked back, making his way toward the kitchen with a mild sense of alarm. 

“Yep!” Juuzou called back. 

Shinohara rounded the corner and walked into the kitchen, the tension in his neck already worsening. But the scene before him left him shocked—Juuzou was…cooking. Really cooking. the cutting board and vegetable scraps and ends showed that he’d been chopping onions, carrots, peas, and various other veggies. Now, he was standing on a footstool, using a wok to cook all the veggies with noodles, adding sauces and spices here and there. Shinohara’s eyes were wide. 

“I didn’t know you could cook,” he said softly. 

“Well, I can cook this! I learned how! I’m making dinner so you should relax.” Shinohara smiled, grinned even, and nodded. 

“Well alright then, I’ll leave you to it.” 

Ten minutes later, Juuzou was calling him to dinner, and Shinohara gladly made his way to the couch, where two steaming bowls of vegetables and noodles awaited them. 

“Thank you,” Shinohara said, digging in. 

“You’re welcome,” Juuzou smiled over at him. For a moment, Shinohara wondered what all of this was about. He thought about their discussion earlier and about Juuzou’s fit. Perhaps it was meant to be something of an apology. That was fine, Shinohara thought. He would take it. 

As they ate, he noticed Juuzou sneaking glances at him from his periphery, so he made sure to look like he was enjoying his dinner. It wasn’t hard—Juuzou had actually done quite an amazing job. As he finished up his bowl, Juuzou turned and looked at him. Shinohara swallowed and smiled. “You did a good job, that was delicious.”

“Good,” Juuzou beamed. “You’re not mad?”

“Not a bit,” Shinohara smiled. “But you know, you can always say sorry, instead.”

“Nah,” Juuzou shrugged. “It’s not about ‘sorry.’”

“What’s it about, then?” Shinohara asked.

Juuzou shrugged. “I just felt like doing it.”

Shinohara shrugged back. “Alright then. I’m glad you felt like it.”

“Me too,” Juuzou smiled. “Sometimes I get tired of take-out.”

Shinohara laughed. “Me too.” 

That night, just as sleep began to overcome him, Shinohara felt Juuzou grab his arm and pull at him. Shinohara let himself roll over on his side, let Juuzou snuggle back into him like a spoon. He buried his nose in Juuzou’s fine hair, wrapped one arm around Juuzou’s chest, let the other one support his head. It had been so long since he’d held someone close like this, and Juuzou’s body felt so warm and small in his arms. He felt Juuzou let out a sigh of contentment, and he sighed as well. In his own way, Shinohara thought, Juuzou cared for him. Maybe he didn’t know it yet. Maybe he didn’t realize it. But he cared. Shinohara was sure of it. 

***

The next morning, he woke up alone. 

“Juuzou?” he called out to the empty house, but there was no answer. 

With a sigh, Shinohara began to prepare for his day, showering, brushing his teeth, then frowning at himself in the mirror as he shaved away his stubble. By the time he was ready and dressed, Juuzou was still nowhere to be seen. Something in Shinohara’s gut felt wrong, but he proceeded on as always, making his way across town on the trains. It felt strange, making the trek into work without Juuzou’s antics and chatter. He missed his partner…missed him more, perhaps, than he could really justify. 

When he got to the 20th Ward’s CCG headquarters, he spent close to an hour searching for Juuzou, but still, he couldn’t find him. The uneasy feeling in his gut had intensified, crystalized into persistent fear. Wherever Juuzou had gone, Shinohara could only hope that he was safe…and that he wasn’t hurting anyone else. 

When his phone rang, he practically jumped out of his skin. With a deep breath, he swiped at his screen and brought the phone up to his ear. 

“Investigator Shinohara.”

“Hello, sir. This is Bureau Investigator Sato in the 20th Ward. We’re here with your partner. He seems to have found some ghoul corpses…he told us to call you.”

“Oh right, of course,” Shinohara replied, holding back a sigh of relief. “Can I get the address?” 

A few minutes later he was in a Bureau car, speeding over to the site where the corpses had been found. It seemed strange that Juuzou would find himself in an alley with ghoul corpses, and the possibilities for what had occurred certainly weren’t lost on Shinohara. He considered the way that Juuzou had curled into him the night before and wondered how one person could contain such affection alongside such violence. But that had been the pattern, hadn’t it? In the privacy of the apartment they now shared, Juuzou was affectionate…even sweet, at times, like when he’d cooked dinner the night before. It had seemed like a clear apology. Yet he’d disappeared just a few hours later, sometime in the early hours of the morning, and now Shinohara was rushing to a site, called again by mysterious circumstances concerning his partner. 

He arrived at the site in minutes, climbed out of the car, and made his way over to the area cordoned off with tape that read “DO NOT CROSS.” Juuzou was sitting atop some boxes, swinging his feet nonchalantly. When he spotted Shinohara, he smiled. 

“Hello Mr. Shinohara! Can you believe it? I just found these ghouls all cut up.”

“It’s a good thing they’re ghouls, too,” one of the Bureau Investigators said, pulling off his hat and wiping at the sweat of his forehead with the back of one hand. “Otherwise we’d have a one hell of a homicide on our hands.” 

Shinohara laughed to cover his nervousness. “Isn’t that the truth!” he said, shaking his head. “Sure is a good thing they’re ghouls. I know I can count on you guys to do the cleanup and process the evidence!” He scratched the back of his head, smiling, then made his way over to the tarp that covered the bodies.

As he lifted the tarp, a grisly sight met his eyes—there were bodies, how many he wasn’t sure, dismembered into so many pieces that he wasn’t sure where one ended and the next began. It was gruesome…disgusting, really, and must have taken some time. 

“There must be…two or three bodies here,” he muttered, counting various extremities. “Jeez.”

With a sigh, he hung his head, then brought it back up. “Juuzou, come here.”

“No way,” Juuzou answered resolutely. 

Shinohara turned and looked at him, arching a brow, and Juuzou looked up to the sky. Shinohara sighed. 

“These ghouls corpses have been dismembered into at least 200 parts,” he said, putting on his most patient tone. “And the cuts are clean…it looks like whoever did this knew how to use his weapon, and he uses it a lot.”

Juuzou’s eyes moved resolutely to the side. 

“It was you, wasn’t it?”

Juuzou finally looked at him, his eyes wide and deeply shadowed. Shinohara wondered if he had slept at all. 

“How did you know?” he asked, his tone projecting so much innocence that Shinohara could hardly stand to look at him. 

“Well, when we were underground with Arima, I was able to see the way you work…up to the point where it made me sick,” he sighed. “Okay, tell me, Ghoul Counter Measure Law, Article 13, clause 2! What does it say?”

He didn’t expect Juuzou to remember, and sure enough, Juuzou looked up at him blankly.

“Uhhhh….oh! If the eyes turn red, it’s a ghoul.”

“Nope,” Shinohara replied, catching the two workers looking at one another with slight smiles. It was an easy mistake to make, after all. “You fail! That’s article 12. You have to learn these things if you want your promotion.”

Juuzou rolled his eyes, scuffed his slipper on the cement. 

“Article 13 is about the preparedness for investigators to capture or eliminate ghouls. Clause 1 states that investigators have a duty to ensure that civilian safety is their highest priority. And Clause 2 says that ‘it is prohibited to cause a ghoul more pain than necessary.’”

Juuzou sighed and looked away with a frown. 

“It isn’t because of the opponent…we’re here to eliminate ghouls. But it’s because that’s what humans would do, right?”

Juuzou was still silent, moping. Shinohara added, “Well, in reality, this is the clause that investigators tend to break the most. But all of that aside, the fact is, you’ll never get a quinque if you continue doing this.”

“What?!” Juuzou yelled, his small, pale brows raising as his eyes went wide. “Why? Are you serious?” 

Finally, he had Juuzou’s attention. 

“You know how quinques are made, right?” he asked gently. Juuzou nodded vigorously and grinned. 

“Yeah! I know! They’re made from dead ghouls.”

“That’s correct. But that doesn’t mean that we can make them from just any part,” Shinohara smiled down at him. “You have to wait until they take out their kagune.”

“That’s the dangly thing, right? But I’ve looked and looked and I don’t even know where that dangly thing comes from!” Juuzou’s brows creased. “How am I supposed to get it?

In moments like these, it was clear that Juuzou hadn’t been through the Academy. Had he been through the classes, he would have known this from pretty much the beginning. It wasn’t Juuzou’s fault, Shinohara reminded himself, that he didn’t know these things. He really did seem to be doing his best. 

“Alright,” Shinhara patted Juuzou’ back and offered him a smile. “I guess it can’t be helped. How about a lesson with a former instructor?” 

Juuzou groaned. “How about a nap?”

“Nope,” Shinohara shook his head. “You have to learn this stuff, or you’ll never get your promotion.”

Juuzou frowned, but he listened as Shinohara patiently explained ghoul physiology and the mechanics of quinques. And that was, in itself, a victory of sorts. 

***

Since Juuzou had done such a good job listening to his impromptu lecture, Shinohara took him out for a bubble tea afterward. Juuzou’s clothes looked exceptionally baggy today, pants cuffed over and over again, the sleeves of his jacket falling over his hands. Shinohara nodded over when his sleeve fell down yet again, and said, “Hey…that doesn’t look like the suit I gave you.”

“It’s a different one…” Juuzou said around his straw, focusing carefully on a particularly elusive boba. “It was dark this morning, so I just grabbed one.”

“Did you get blood on it?”

“Uhhhhhh…..” Juuzou looked at the black fabric for a minute, then shrugged. “Maybe I did!” 

Shinohara groaned. 

“Juuzou, that’s my good suit.”

“Can’t you wash it?”

“I can get the CCG cleaners to give it a go…”

“Anyway it’s black, you can’t even tell!”

“I guess that’s true,” Shinohara replied gloomily.

“Are you grumpy today, Mr. Shinohara?”

“Well, it’s been a long morning.”

“Why?”

“Possibly because someone snuck out this morning and dismembered 3 ghouls into 200 pieces…”

“It was really only like one hundred-and-fifty pieces though,” Juuzou replied, swinging his feet off of the bench, “So I don’t think it was that bad.”

“There really shouldn’t be pieces…” Shinohara sighed. 

“I know, I know, Article 13. But it’s okay, right? We can clean your suit and anyway now I know about the kakujan…”

“Kakuhou…”

“Yeah! So I can get promoted really soon.” 

“We’ll see. You’ve got a lot to learn.”

“There’s _more_?” 

“Yeah…but you’re a quick learner. I think you can do it.”

Juuzou smiled, and Shinohara smiled back. 

“Hey, if I get promoted, will I still be your partner?”

“Probably for awhile,” Shinohara replied. He wasn’t sure that anyone else would want to be partnered with the Problem Child and anyway, he still had a lot to learn. Shinohara just hoped that he could continue with this progress. 

“Good. I don’t want to stop sleeping with you.”

Shinohara’s heart fell into his stomach and he looked around quickly. No one seemed to be paying attention to them, which was a relief, but his breath was still caught in his throat.

“What?” Juuzou asked, staring at him keenly. “Why are you afraid?”

“I don’t…Juuzou, it’s okay to talk about those things when it’s just us…but not out here. Or at work.”

“Because you don’t want anyone to know you’re a homosexual?”

Shinohara groaned and shushed him softly. “Juuzou, that’s enough.” 

“Why? You haven’t even kissed me yet.”

“I told you why and…wait, what? 

“I said you haven’t kissed me.”

“I…” Shinohara’s stomach was in knots, he could feel sweat forming on his upper lip. It was a perfectly temperate day, but the sunlight felt quite suddenly oppressive. Shinohara wiped his hand over his face, tried to steady his racing heart.

“I thought you were going to, last night. You put your nose in my hair, but you didn’t kiss me.”

“Juuzou, please…can we talk about this later? At home?”

“Anyway, I waited but you fell asleep so I left and found some ghouls.”

“Wait…that’s why you left?”

Juuzou nodded, staring up at Shinohara as he sucked a boba up through his straw. The sight wasn’t doing anything to help calm Shinohara, so he looked away, then down at his hands. They were clenched tight into fists, balled up just like the tension in his gut. 

“Okay, well…I…”

“You don’t want to?”

“No, that isn’t it…I…”

“So you want to kiss me? Did you want to last night?”

“Why this, all of a sudden? You’ve never talked to me about kissing before, Juuzou…”

“I’ve kissed you.”

Shinohara stopped for a moment and stared at him, open-mouthed. 

“When you were drunk. I snuck into your bed and kissed you.”

Shinohara felt a bit dumbstruck. A part of him felt relieved…he hadn’t imagined it, after all. Another part of him felt…well, he didn’t want to dwell on that. And yet another part of him knew that he had to talk to Juuzou about this particular issue, and that it couldn’t wait. 

“Juuzou, you really can’t kiss people when they’re drunk.”

“Why?”

“Because they can’t…tell you it’s okay.”

“But I wanted to.”

“I know, but how could you know I wanted to?”

“Because I saw the way you looked at me.”

Shinohara swallowed. Well, there it was. He looked at the milk coffee in his hand, and wished it was something harder. 

“Juuzou, you can’t just make assumptions about what people want to do by the way they look at you.”

Juuzou frowned, tilting his head to the side. “It wasn’t an assumption, Mr. Shinohara, it was _really obvious_ and…”

“Juuzou,” Shinohara stopped him. He was feeling faint. “Just…”

“Was…I wrong?” Juuzou asked. Shinohara looked over at him, studied the question in his eyes and the disappointment in the downturn of his lips. 

“I…you…but…” Shinohara drew a deep breath, shut his eyes for a moment, tried to center himself. Finally, he continued, “No, Juuzou, you weren’t wrong. But even still, it’s a bad idea to kiss people when they drunk, or to do anything else with them.”

“But I wasn’t wrong.”

“No…no, you weren’t.”

Juuzou grinned, triumphant. 

“But please…let’s talk about this tonight…at home.”

“Okay,” Juuzou agreed. “But how come you have a tiger tattooed on your back?”

Shinohara sighed, buried his face in his hands, and laughed. “Oh Juuzou…what am I going to do? You’re too sharp for me.” 

“No, I really want to know!” Juuzou whined, throwing his cup at a trashcan ten feet away. The cup hit the edge, bounced, and still managed to fall into the can. Juuzou grinned. “Tell me!”

“It’s not…that interesting…” Shinohara sighed. “I’m not…the best, when it comes to drinking. Iwaccho took me drinking one night and I guess I saw a tiger on television at the bar and decided to get a tattoo. Iwaccho let me, because he thought it was hilarious. The next day I didn’t know why my back hurt so bad, and then I looked in the mirror…Iwaccho got a tattoo of a fish to make it up to me.” Shinohara smiled fondly at the memory. “Mine looks better.”

“I’m never going drinking with you,” Juuzou declared with wide eyes.

“Oh yeah?” Shinohara laughed, feeling lighter. “I would have thought you’d be into all that…you know, with all those stitches.”

“Stitches are totally different!” Juuzou protested. “They come out!”

“Hmm, you have a point,” Shinohara shrugged. “Anyway, we need to get back to the office.”

“Okay…” Juuzou sighed, lifting his face to the sun and closing his eyes. “But I’m tired of looking through files.”

“We’re almost done,” Shinohara assured him. 

“And when we go home tonight, we’ll talk more?”

“Yeah,” Shinohara agreed, though he was already half-dreading the prospect. “We will.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't include all of Shinohara's lecture, but if you want to be reminded (and to see a chapter where these two are REALLY CUTE) check out [Chapter 53](http://bato.to/read/_/238303/tokyo-ghoul_v6_ch53_by_twisted-hel-scans) of Tokyo Ghoul. Also, the first part with the meeting and Seidou's bloody nose comes from [Chapter 49](http://bato.to/read/_/236355/tokyo-ghoul_v6_ch49_by_twisted-hel-scans/4).
> 
> Also, I will be at AX next week, so if you want to say hello let me know! On Saturday, I'll be cosplaying Shinohara and my partner will be cosplaying Juuzou! If you see us, say hi!


	6. Attachment

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Did Juuzou even understand what he was asking for? Did he even know what it was that he wanted? Shinohara wondered if he was overthinking all of this. Juuzou was both incredibly young and incredibly curious. He was probably just experimenting. Shinohara wondered to himself if that was something that he even wanted…at his age, “messing around” didn’t have the same appeal that it once had. And what if it made things strange between them? They shared so much of their lives already—living together, eating together, working together, now even sleeping in the same bed—what if this made it all fall apart?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A new chapter for you all! I hope that you enjoy!
> 
> As always, you can find me at [tinyghoulproblem](http://tinyghoulproblem.tumblr.com/) on tumblr, and the fic tag is "fic: problem child". 
> 
> Please remember that comments and kudos mean a lot!
> 
> Enjoy!

Eventually, the paperwork was finished. They went out for sushi, and though Shinohara was tempted to order a sake, or a beer at least, he restrained himself. If they were going to talk more about…about _that_ later, he wanted to be in full possession of his faculties. Juuzou chattered away as usual, picking up pieces of salmon resting on pillows of rice and stuffing them into his mouth without missing a beat. Shinohara watched him, sticky fingered and smiling, and wondered if he’d forgotten all that they’d spoken of before. Some part of him knew that Juuzou had not forgotten, that the conversation would happen because it had to. Still, he wasn’t even vaguely sure of what to say. 

Since they’d become partners, Shinohara had been focused on doing everything that he could to ignore anything related to attraction. Because it was easy to see that Juuzou was beautiful—his large, doll-like eyes, his pale smooth skin, the curve of his face—he looked almost immortal, or at least otherworldly. And it was hard to ignore. Harder still when he fought, or flipped or ran; the sheer ruthless beauty of him was eye-catching, jaw-dropping, even for those who wouldn’t typically be attracted to another male. Shinohara remembered the way that the other investigators watched Juuzou’s fight with Houji. There was something magical about the way that he moved, flowing around his opponent, as fast as any ghoul. 

And it was exactly because he was so fascinating that Shinohara had made something of an unspoken agreement with himself: Juuzou was his partner, and Juuzou was off-limits. Of course, Juuzou had tested his resolve when he climbed into his arms on the couch, when he curled up atop him like a cat, when he asked to live with Shinohara, and now, apparently, when he’d snuck a drunken kiss. And honestly, it puzzled Shinohara—what did Juuzou want with him? Why was he so adamant about touching him, about being close to him, about the two of them sharing a home? No one seemed to believe that Juuzou was the type to get attached, and attachment was another question entirely. Was Juuzou attached? Was he just…lonely? Bored? Horny? And what was it that he wanted? Physical touch? Kisses? Sex? Love? 

What did Shinohara himself want? He wasn’t sure. He felt it, the wrongness of it…Juuzou was his partner, he was young, he was Shinohara’s subordinate in just about every possible way. Were they to sleep together, it wouldn’t be the first time that such a relationship had developed between investigators. However, it was frowned upon. Deeply. Probably frowned upon even more deeply when the partners were male. 

Did Juuzou even understand what he was asking for? Did he even know what it was that he wanted? Shinohara wondered if he was overthinking all of this. Juuzou was both incredibly young and incredibly curious. He was probably just experimenting. Shinohara wondered to himself if that was something that he even wanted…at his age, “messing around” didn’t have the same appeal that it once had. And what if it made things strange between them? They shared so much of their lives already—living together, eating together, working together, now even sleeping in the same bed—what if this made it all fall apart?

Pain blossomed in his shin, and Shinohara cursed and frowned. “Juuzou, what was that for?” he asked.

“You haven’t said anything for like…at least ten minutes. I didn’t even think you were listening.”

“Sorry,” Shinohara shrugged, rubbed the back of his neck. “I’m just tired.”

“Are you thinking about something?” Juuzou asked, head tilted, “Like about the Binge Eater?”

Shinohara opened his mouth, then sighed. “Yeah. I’m just…thinking about a lot.”

“Huh,” Juuzou looked at him with some suspicion. 

“You ready to go?” Shinohara asked, eyeing the empty plates before them.

“Yeah,” Juuzou nodded, “Let’s go home.” 

***

“So?”

Juuzou was sitting next to him on the couch, wide-eyed and expectant. Shinohara’s gut was in knots. 

“Ahh, yeah, so,” He started. Juuzou blinked. Shinohara sighed. “Juuzou, what is it that you want?”

Juuzou shrugged. That wasn’t particularly helpful. Shinohara tried again. 

“Why do you want me to kiss you?”

Juuzou shrugged again. 

“Are you….curious? To know what it will feel like?”

“I’ve never kissed a man before,” Juuzou shrugged. “Just my mama.”

Shinohara let that digest for a moment, nodded, and continued, “Alright, so you want to know what it feels like to kiss a man.”

Juuzou nodded. “But most people are gross.”

“And I’m…not gross?”

Juuzou hummed thoughtfully, then continued, “Sometimes you get sweaty in your sleep, but you’re not very gross. And I like the way you smell.”

“I…like the way you smell too,” Shinohara replied, a small smile spreading over his lips. 

“So do ghouls,” Juuzou reminded him. 

“I wasn’t a ghoul last time I checked.”

“Nope!” Juuzou declared. 

“Is that…is that all that you want?” Shinohara asked quietly. It was silly…stupid, even, but his insides felt light, like…like he was a kid, getting butterflies over a crush. He didn’t even want to admit it to himself, but the thought of kissing Juuzou made him feel almost lightheaded. He wanted it so much that he felt like he might want it too much. He wanted it so much that he was afraid of it, that it might disappoint him, or worse, overpower him. He took pride in his will, in his self-control. He was terrified of the prospect that someone else could undo him this way and yet…

“Yeah, I mean, I don’t know. Maybe. I’m not sure.” Juuzou shrugged again, sighed. “I don’t want to talk about it, let’s just do it.”

There were many reasons why he wanted to talk about it. They’d been haunting him all night, and he felt as if he needed answers, as if he needed to make an informed decision. But then again, he’d never before put this level of thought into a relationship, and certainly not into a kiss. Typically, he found his partners through mutual need and convenience. Why was it that something as small, as simple as a kiss—so meaningless in so many contexts—felt so crushingly serious in this moment? Perhaps he was overthinking it. Perhaps he…

But then Juuzou was moving toward him, climbing over him, straddling his lap and facing him, his big eyes just inches from Shinohara’s own, his lips small and pink and still a little wet from when he must have licked them a moment before. Juuzou let his eyes slip closed. Shinohara cupped his soft cheek in one hand. His heart pounded out a strange rhythm in his ears as he leaned forward, as he caught Juuzou’s lips with his own. 

They kissed. It was still and soft and quiet all around, except inside of Shinohara’s mind, inside of his chest, which felt as though it might explode. They kissed, and the world was the same as it had always been, except now, Shinohara knew the taste of Juuzou’s lips. 

Nothing was different. Nothing was the same. 

Shinohara pulled back, Juuzou smiled. Looped his arms around Shinohara’s neck. Whispered, “Again.”

Shinohara’s arms found their way around Juuzou’s waist. He was pulling him closer, pressing his lips to Juuzou’s again, and just as he began to pulled away, those lips whispered _again_ against his own, a request, a demand, a plea. 

It was so rare that Shinohara found himself helpless, but here he was, powerless to everything but the call of Juuzou’s whispers, powerless to everything but the pull of those slender arms around his neck. He kissed him again, deeper, and Juuzou giggled. 

“Your face is scratchy,” he whispered into Shinohara’s lips, and Shinohara couldn’t suppress his own smile. 

“Again.” 

They sat like that, Juuzou straddling Shinohara’s lap, his slender form pressed, inch for inch, to Shinohara’s torso, kissing again and again, this way and that, sometimes with the lightest touch, sometimes more deeply, until Shinohara’s lips left Juuzou’s and worked their way to his ear and the space just below it, to his neck and the space where it disappeared into his shirt. Juuzou laughed, but it caught in his throat and turned into a soft moan, which reverberated through Shinohara’s entire body. All the thoughts that had plagued him, all of the doubt and insecurity abated, and it was only them and the buttery light of the lamp, the soft fabric of the couch, their lips, their hands, their bodies pressed together and speaking in a language that flowed from the fingertips instead of the tongue. 

It lasted forever. It lasted for no time at all. 

Juuzou sighed and buried his face in Shinohara’s neck. Shinohara kept his eyes closed for a moment, savoring the warmth of Juuzou’s body pressed against his own, his fingers finding respite in the soft waves of Juuzou’s hair. 

They breathed. Time passed. 

Juuzou muttered, “That feels good.”

Shinohara nodded, the scruff of his five o’clock shadow brushing over Juuzou’s neck. Juuzou giggled. 

“What else can you do?”

Shinohara laughed, surprised, and then sighed. 

“There’s…there’s a lot of things that I…that we can do,” he replied, trying to pull his thoughts together, to rearrange them. It felt like a hopeless task. 

“Even though…even with my…the way I am?” Juuzou asked, face still pressed into Shinohara’s neck. 

“Yeah,” Shinohara confirmed. 

Juuzou pulled away from him and grinned, his palms resting on Shinohara’s chest. “I wanna do it all. Let’s do all of it!”

“Woah, woah,” Shinohara murmured, cheeks warm. “Let’s…let’s take it one step at a time, okay?”

Juuzou’s lips turned into a pout. “Why?”

“It’s just…well, maybe kissing is enough for today.”

“What will we do tomorrow?” Juuzou asked. 

“I don’t know,” Shinohara answered, “But…one day at a time, okay?”

“Fine,” Juuzou sighed. “But tonight, when we sleep, you’ll kiss me again?”

“Okay,” Shinohara agreed. “One more time.”

***

“Are you listening?” Amon asked, a note of impatience keeping into his voice.

“What?” Shinohara replied stupidly, then shook his head. “I’m sorry, I’m a little distracted today. What were you saying?”

“Well,” he started, “We have a meeting with Marude today.”

“Yeah,” Shinohara nodded to his computer. “I got an email about it.”

“Do you know what he wants?”

“Well,” Shinohara rubbed his hand over his mouth. “There’s only so much I know…we’ll learn more later, but they seem to be planning a raid. Most likely on the 11th Ward. We need to take it back, and we need more than a few isolated teams to do that.”

“Makes sense…” Amon started slowly. 

“What, you think there’s something else?” Shinohara asked. 

“Well, I just think that…I think they might have gotten more intel on the ghoul organization. The one taking out investigators.”

“Probably,” Shinohara shrugged, “But we have to wait for Marude. He’ll have to explain it all.”

“I know, I just…” Amon looked down at the desk. Shinohara grimaced and leaned toward him. 

“Look, Amon, what’s going on?”

Amon frowned, then balled his hands into fists. Shinohara reached over and put his hand on Amon’s shoulder, squeezing it. Though he had his own preoccupations at the moment, it was clear that Amon was struggling. Shinohara didn’t like to see his team members struggling, nor his students, but he’d been teaching long enough to know that these sorts of struggles often provided a clear path for learning. He waited patiently, sure that Amon would respond when he was ready. Finally, he spoke. 

“I’m working on this Rabbit case, trying to find some answers…trying to find some rest for Mr. Mado. It’s…I know that my perspective may be…influenced by personal factors, but I also…I think there’s more to this. I don’t know what yet, but I think that there’s more to the Rabbit and the Eyepatch than we realize. And I think that…if I get pulled away…I…”

“You’re afraid that you may not find the answers you’re seeking?”

“I…yes…but there’s more. It’s more than what I’m seeking. I think that there’s something we might be missing…something that we’re all missing. I don’t want to lost whatever progress I’m making.”

“Amon,” Shinohara said, staring straight into his eyes, “Listen. If there’s something more to it, you’ll find it. And just because we shift our focus…that doesn’t mean that you can’t continue that investigation. And you should continue it. But for awhile…for just a little while, it might have to be continued on your own time.”

Amon nodded. 

“Look,” Shinohara chuckled, letting Amon’s shoulder go long enough to smack it lightly, “You’ve got enough free time now. No kids, no wife. Maybe you need to marry your investigation for awhile, huh?”

“I guess so,” Amon nodded. 

“And listen,” Shinohara leaned forward, spoke a little softer. “You’re a good investigator, Amon. Mado was right about that. If you have a hunch about something…don’t ignore that, okay?”

“Thanks, Shinohara,” Amon replied. “I won’t.”

“Good,” Shinohara smiled. “So when do we meet Marude?”

“In about thirty minutes,” Amon replied. 

“Better go find Juuzou,” Shinohara said, standing and straightening his jacket. 

“Marude is…well. Are you sure it’s a good idea to bring Juuzou?”

Shinohara shrugged. “He’s gotta learn. This is the only way that will happen.”

“You’re a much more patient teacher than I am…” 

“You’ll have to learn sometime,” Shinohara opened the door, and Amon walked through it. “Teaching is an art…the art of letting people learn from their own errors without letting them make errors that are too grave. That’s an important thing to remember for when you have your own subordinates.”

“My own subordinates?” Amon asked. 

“Someday,” Shinohara winked. 

“Right.”

***

Juuzou was sitting in the cafeteria, sipping at a juice box and wolfing down a pastry. Shinohara walked up behind him and ruffled his hair gently. 

“Hey, did you check your email?”

“No. It’s annoying.”

“Well, be that as it may, we have a meeting with Marude in a few minutes.”

“Okay. Hey, Amon.”

Amon nodded at Juuzou. He was still unsure around Juuzou, ever since Juuzou’s stunningly bad first impression. Shinohara assumed that he would get more comfortable with him as time went on…and hopefully, as Juuzou’s behavior improved. 

“Anyway,” Juuzou spoke around a mouthful of pastry, “What’s Marude?”

“He’s your superior,” Shinohara replied, nodding his head for the door. “And he’s here visiting us from the main office.”

“The main office?” Juuzou asked, eyes going wide. 

“Yeah, so come on,” Amon started toward the door. “Let’s not be late.”

“Okay!” Juuzou jumped up and shoved the rest of his pastry into his mouth. 

Shinohara followed after Amon, watching Juuzou in his old suit, crumbs everywhere. That wouldn’t do. 

“Juuzou, come here,” he called out. Juuzou turned and walked back to him.    
“Yes, Mr. Shinohara?”

“You’re…you’ve got some crumbs.”

Juuzou smiled. “Okay!”

“Well,” Shinohara leaned down toward him a bit. “You should brush them off or something. This man is from the main office.” 

“Why don’t you brush them off or something?” Juuzou’s face screamed innocence, but his eyes had just enough wickedness in them for Shinohara to catch wise. He frowned and shook his head. 

“Juuzou, come on, we don’t have time to goof around right now. Brush off the crumbs and let’s go.” Juuzou frowned, but did as he was told. As they walked away, Shinohara wondered if that was Juuzou’s way of flirting, but he’d have to consider it later. For now, they had to remain on task. 

As they walked toward the meeting room where Marude waited, Juuzou shoved his hands in his pockets and asked, “Mr. Shinohara, who in the world is this man visiting us from the main office?”

“He’s the commander of the 11th Ward Special Counter Measures Unit,” Shinohara replied.

“Commander?” Juuzou ran in front of Shinohara, eyes wide. “Is he important?”

“He’s very important so…don’t snap at him, okay?”

“Okay,” Juuzou agreed. A few moments of silence passed, nothing but the ambient noise of the CCG hallways and the sounds of their shoes slapping the tile. Then Juuzou spoke again. “So as long as I don’t snap, everything else is fine?”

“Juuzou, don’t do anything else either. Just…be good, okay? For this time?”

“Okay,” Juuzou pouted. 

They arrived at the room, and Shinohara opened the door. 

“Yo,” he called out, “We’re here.”

“Yo, I’ve been waiting, Shinohara,” Marude turned toward them, a greasy sort of smile on his face. Shinohara smiled back, hoping that his expression didn’t betray his trepidation. Marude wasn’t a bad guy, and he wasn’t bad at his job…but he was a difficult person to like, and often, a difficult person to be around. He possessed a charming mix of disregard for the feelings of others, an uncanny ability to get right to the heart of a person’s weaknesses, and a distinctively absent filter for his thoughts. Combined with a bad sense of humor, it made him a less than delightful conversational partner. At the same time, he was good at his job—so good, in fact, that the rest of his attributes could be ignored. In some ways, not unlike Juuzou himself. 

“You seem like you’re in a good mood, Maru,” Shinohara said, scratching the back of his neck nervously. “In fact, you were in a good mood earlier when we spoke…”

“No shit!” Marude crowed, “I got promoted to strategy commander! Who wouldn’t be in a good mood! And if I do a good job, I’ll finally have a shot at becoming a government official! Hell yeah!”

Shinohara’s eyes darted over to Amon, who was staring at Marude with a narrowed gaze. Vaguely, he recalled that there had been some tension between the two, but he didn’t remember the circumstances. It didn’t matter, ultimately…Marude was Amon’s superior, and they all had to work together. Even when investigators didn’t get along, they were expected to work together in the field. That was just the way it was, and bad blood here or there didn’t change a thing. 

“Hey, Amon!” Marude laughed, “You’re still fuckin’ huge!”

He walked over to Amon, who all but flinched as Marude clapped a hand down on his shoulder. 

“Yeah, long time no see! But hey, sorry about Mado. Just make sure you don’t make the same mistakes as he did…play with your toys nicely, huh?”

Amon was silent, but Shinohara saw his hands clenching up into fists. He felt wave of trepidation—Amon wouldn’t anything stupid, would he?—but Marude’s attention had already shifted, his eyes falling on Juuzou.

“Now then,” he muttered, his lips curling into a disgusted snarl. Juuzou stared up at him, curious, expectant. Shinohara grit his teeth. “A…girl?”

Shinohara leaned over to him and muttered, “That’s Rank 3 Suzuya, the one I told you about earlier?”

Juuzou looked down and muttered, “Hello.”

“Oh, you’re the one Chairman Washuu personally recommended, aren’t you? Just the opposite of Arima…I don’t know what he sees in you at all.”

“Marude,” Shinohara broke in, “You shouldn’t gossip about the Washuu household…”

“Relax, Shinohara, I wouldn’t do it in public or anything. I’d be ruined!” He laughed, and Shinohara tried to smile. 

“But shit, you look so fragile! Are you sure you have balls?”

Shinohara felt his stomach drop, and he quickly stepped between Juuzou and Marude, arms outstretched, trying to stop any trouble before it started. Even Amon looked offended, and Shinohara looked back and forth between him and Marude as he said, “Maru, hey, you really shouldn’t tease him so much.”

Amon’s gaze was fixed on Juuzou, and as Shinohara’s eyes traveled over to Juuzou’s face, he understood why. Juuzou was standing still, eyes wide and bloodshot, staring down at the floor, a strange little smile curling at his lips. He didn’t appear to be reacted at all, and Shinohara thought it might stay that way, if only they could shift the conversation. 

“Anyway!” he interjected loudly, “Why did you call us here today?”

“What, you don’t know? I would’a thought the gossip mill worked better than that! Look. this case is the biggest one I’ve ever been given. I can’t afford to screw it up, so I need the best game pieces I can find.” He grinned at Amon, and then at Shinohara. Shinohara felt his heart racing, still worried about what Juuzou might do. That expression he’d had wasn’t natural. 

“In other words, I’m borrowing you guys from your current positions for now. You’re going to help me in the 11th Ward Countermeasures Unit for awhile…and that’s an order, so you don’t get the right to refuse, understood?”

“What?” Shinohara replied, eyes wide. “Seriously?”

“Yeah,” Marude laughed. “I’m having all the info sent over in hard copy. Look it over and start training. The operation commences in ten days.”

***

“Juuzou,” Shinohara muttered, but Juuzou wasn’t listening. Instead, he shot off down the hall in the direction of the stairs, skipping and muttering to himself. Shinohara frowned, rubbed his hand over his face, and sighed. he felt the weight of a hand fall against his shoulder and looked up to find Amon staring at him. 

“Hey,” he said. “Can we look over the operation information?”

“Yeah,” Shinohara replied, distracted. He was sure that Juuzou was running up to the roof, but at least up there he would be alone, and not in danger of hurting anyone else. Maybe being alone was for the best. He hand’t seemed as though he wanted to be followed, after all. Shinohara could catch up with him tonight, when he’d had some time to process, to cool down. 

“Yeah, let’s go.”

In the office, they went through file after file of paperwork, Shinohara’s frown deepening with every file he read through. There were hundred of them, and going through each one took hours.

“Jesus,” he finally muttered, rubbing at his temple. “Just how many Special Class investigators is he calling in for this thing? He’s all fired up, and he’s being reckless.” 

“He’s pulling away so much power from the 23rd Ward…” Amon muttered, staring at the roster of agents who were being called up for the mission. “Is that really going to be okay?”

Shinohara didn’t offer an answer…he didn’t really have one to offer, and he’d learned to keep his mouth shut when he didn’t have much to say. 

“As expected,” Amon went on, “Juuzou is the only Rank 3 he’s bringing.” 

Shinohara sighed. “Maru would use an old woman if he thought it would make him more successful. So he figures he can use Juuzou, that’s all. But look,” he pointed to a file before him. “There’s a lot of troublesome enemies there as well.”

“Like who?” Amon asked, frowning.

“Jason of the 13th ward, for one.”

Amon frowned. 

“Those who try to go against him are shredded and tossed aside like a dirty rag,” Shinohara continued on. “He’s a sadistic bastard that kills for pleasure, not for food. Even first class investigators are afraid of that one.” 

“He’s just one of them,” Amon shook his head. “We don’t know who’s going to be there or how tough they will be.”

Shinohara sighed and closed his eyes. “This is a terrible job. God damn you, Maru.”

Amon sighed and plunked down in the chair next to Shinohara. It reminded him that he’d had a question for Amon, but he hadn’t had a chance to ask it. 

“Hey, Amon…your quinque was broken, wasn’t it?”

“Yes,” Amon answered, frowning.   
“Jeez,” Shinohara muttered, “Harima left you that quinque. You should’ve been more careful.”

Amon sighed and looked at his hands. “I know. I can’t deny it.”

Shinohara felt a pang in his chest, the familiar sting of loss. He’d felt it far too often in his life, but that was the fate of a CCG investigator. Lest they forget, this was war. They had no choice but to fight, and there would be casualties. Shinohara could hope all he wanted, could hope all day long for a change, but ultimately, he was doing all that he could. They all were. 

“Harima was a good person,” Shinohara said softly, recalling the memory of her gentle smile. “She was strong and smart…she had a good sense of justice. And she brought me cookies.”

He looked over at Amon, who looked somewhat stricken, a deep frown curving across his lips. 

“Look, let’s stop talking about it…it’s too gloomy. And we have a lot to get done.”

Amon was quiet, staring down at the paperwork before him. Shinohara felt bad for him. Of course Amon still felt the sting of her death, and Shinohara was quite sure that he felt bad about the loss of the quinque. He liked Amon too—he also felt a strong sense of justice, and he’d come from a difficult situation. Mado had been convinced of his worth, and Mado had a good sense for people. Shinohara stood and stretched, then clapped a hand on Amon’s back. 

“Look, for a quinque, you should be able to take one of Mado’s. Your choice.”

“Really?” Amon asked, looking at him wide-eyed. 

“Yep,” Shinohara smiled. “He put it in his will. We can’t read out the entire will yet, but I think that much at least can be…put into affect.”

For a moment, he thought that Amon was about to cry, his lips setting into a hard line as he looked up, blinking rapidly. 

“Just don’t break this one, okay?”

“Yes, sir!” Amon said forcefully. It might have been comical, if Shinohara wasn’t so sure that he meant it with all of his heart. Shinohara smiled at him and nodded. 

“Alright, that’s what I like to hear!”

Amon smiled and looked away quickly before asking, “By the way, where did Juuzou go?”

“To the roof, I think,” Shinohara sighed. “It’s getting late. I’ll go get him.”

***

As predicted, he found Juuzou on the roof, hanging upside down from the railing in a way that made Shinohara’s mouth go dry. He didn’t think that Juuzou wanted to die, but how many precarious situations could someone put themselves in before they ended up hurt…or worse?

“Juuzou, it’s me,” Shinohara muttered softly. “Think you can…come over away from the edge?”

“Hey Mr. Shinohara,” Juuzou muttered, pulling his body up so he was sitting on the rails. His hair was a frizzy mess, his eyes bloodshot, his mouth still pulled into an uncanny grin. 

“Hey,” Shinohara smiled at him, but the smile felt weak on his lips. He crouched down again, put himself below Juuzou’s eyeline, and nodded. “Think you can come over here, now?”

Juuzou eyes him for a moment, then slid off the rail and walked toward him. The fact that he hadn’t had to cajole Juuzou wasn’t lost on Shinohara, who felt a wave of relief as soon as Juuzou stepped away from the rail. Slowly, Juuzou slunk closer, then finally pressed himself against Shinohara, who pulled him into his arms. 

Juuzou’s body was stiff, unyielding to the implicit request of Shinohara’s embrace, so Shinohara pulled back and looked him in the eyes. 

“Look, Maru…Marude isn’t a kind man,” he muttered, “He said some cruel things to Amon, too. Sometimes…the men in charge aren’t always kind. But we still have to make it work, you know? So we can do our jobs and kill ghouls. It’s not that bad, right? You don’t have to work with him very much, I promise.”

Juuzou’s smile grew. “I don’t care about him. Rei says I might be able to get a new quinque, you know? That’s all that matters. I’m going to kill a lot of ghouls, and I’m going to get a new quinque. I don’t care about that gross old man.”

Shinohara wasn’t sure if he believed Juuzou, but then again, how much of a choice did he have? He wasn’t going to try to convince Juuzou that he was upset, and if he was more comfortable pretending to be happy—excited, even—why should Shinohara tell him otherwise? Still, he wasn’t himself, and Shinohara wasn’t entirely sure how to bring him back to earth. 

“Hey,” he muttered, and Juuzou looked at him with big, empty eyes. “You know what’s close by here?”

“What?” 

“The candy store. Wanna go?”

“I’d rather train.”

“Really?” Shinohara asked, shocked. “You’d rather train than eat candy?”

“Yeah,” Juuzou nodded. “Is that okay?”

“Sure…” Shinohara replied. “At least…for a little bit.”

***

When he changed into his training clothes—an old t-shirt and sweatpants—Shinohara assumed they would be at it for an hour or so. Then they could get dinner and head home. After all, it was already late in the afternoon, and most of the investigators would be leaving to go home soon. At the same time, a part of him felt like he should do whatever Juuzou needed him to…so when an hour passed, and Juuzou wanted to move on from exercise routines to sparring, Shinohara agreed. Then another hour passed, and though Shinohara could feel the sweat dripping from his forehead and the lactic acid burning in his muscles, Juuzou showed no signs of slowing. Determined to keep up with him, Shinohara continued, even as the hands of the clock made their revolutions. 

They moved from sparring hand-to-hand to using practice quinques, then from practice quinques to the equipment, Juuzou scaling the climbing wall while Shinohara lifted free weights halfheartedly. Still, Juuzou was strangely quiet, muttering to himself as he moved around the gym, his hair sweaty, wisps of it escaping his topknot and sticking to his neck, his eyes empty and far away. Finally, when the clock read nine, Shinohara gave up. 

“Hey, Juuzou,” he called out. Juuzou was climbing up a rope that dangled from the gym ceiling, and though Shinohara was sure that he’d heard his name, he didn’t respond. 

“Juuzou?” Shinohara called again, but Juuzou just kept ignoring him, kept climbing. “Juuzou, hey! Can you hear me?”

Finally, Juuzou stopped climbing, then let go of the rope and let his upper body fall back until he was staring at Shinohara upside-down, legs still clinging to the rope like an acrobat or a circus performer. Shinohara’s heart was pounding at the sight of him like that, thirty feet above the ground and hanging by his legs, but he swallowed and continued, “Listen, it’s late! I think we need to get going.”

Juuzou frowned. “Are you sure?”

“Yeah,” Shinohara nodded. “I’m afraid so. Come on down…let’s go home, okay?”

Juuzou nodded and slithered down the rope, jumping off about ten feet above the ground and landing with a roll. 

He stayed quiet as they rode the trains home, still dressed in the tank top and shorts that he wore for training. Shinohara kept an eye on him, especially when he saw an older business man leering on the final train home, but Juuzou didn’t seem to notice or care. Finally, they were home, and Juuzou went straight to his room. Shinohara frowned, but decided to leave him alone for now. Maybe he needed some time to himself. 

Shinohara grabbed a protein bar and ate it quickly before hopping in the shower and scrubbing the dried sweat and grime of the day from his skin. When he climbed into bed, Juuzou was not there. Still, he laid off to one side, rubbing the flat of his palm against the space where Juuzou’s torso would usually rest, the whole of his body feeling the absence of that slight form that usually curled against his own. After years of sleeping alone, why did it suddenly seem so foreign, so lonely? He thought about the night before, the electricity in his limbs, the taste of Juuzou’s mouth, and wondered why it all felt so far away now. 

Juuzou was resilient, he knew that much. He’d come back from worse things than some taunting from Marude, but this…it seemed more serious than his reaction to the police officer or even the man on the subway. Something in Marude’s words or in the circumstances themselves had gotten to Juuzou in a way nothing else had thus far. He could only hope that Juuzou would sleep it off by tomorrow. 

Despite the volume of his thoughts, he felt himself drifting off, the noise in his head eventually going white, and then quieting altogether. 

He awoke, eyes blinking open slowly, to find himself staring straight at Juuzou. Information broke through the haze of sleep one bit at a time, so that he first realized that Juuzou was damp, that he smelled of soap, and finally, that he was entirely naked. Shinohara’s eyes opened wide, and he sat up with a bit of a start. 

“Juuzou?” he croaked out sleepily. “What’s going on?”

“He was right,” Juuzou said softly, staring into Shinohara’s face. “He was right, that I don’t have balls. See?” 

Juuzou sat up so that Shinohara could see the full expanse of his torso, flat and pale, the creamy skin of his stomach giving way to pink scars, to a knob of flesh that Shinohara had understood existed but had never yet seen. 

“I know,” Shinohara whispered, his eyes traveling back up Juuzou’s body and finding his gaze. “I was the one who…who found you. At the ghoul restaurant. The doctors told me about…about what they did to you.”

“How did he know?”

“Juuzou…” Shinohara sighed. “He didn’t. Maru shoots his mouth off. No one…told him or anything. He was just being…his usual charming self.”

“So who knows?”

“Me, the doctors…that’s probably it, unless you told someone else.”

“Does that mean you’ll still kiss me?”

“Do you still want me to?” Shinohara asked, rubbing at his eyes. 

“Yeah,” Juuzou nodded. “And the other stuff?”

“All of it,” Shinohara nodded. “Nothing has changed.”

“And I can still get a quinque?”

Shinohara sighed, then laughed softly. “If you work hard, and get promoted, and kill a powerful ghoul…then yes, you’ll still get a quinque.”

Juuzou nodded, then slid beneath the covers and turned his back to Shinohara. Slowly, tentatively, Shinohara reached his arms out, and Juuzou scooted back into them. 

“Sleep, now,” Shinohara murmured into the back of Juuzou’s neck. And then, he planted a series of gentle kisses there, his arms folding Juuzou into a tight embrace. Juuzou sighed softy and nodded, some of the tension in his limbs melting away. 

Eventually, he felt Juuzou’s breathing even out, felt his body go soft and pliant. Only then did Shinohara let himself fall asleep again.


	7. The Raid

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “That boy you’re partnered with…his name is Suzuya, right?” Iwao asked.
> 
> “Yeah,” Shinohara nodded. They were making their way down another hallway now, steadily working their way through the building. 
> 
> “He’s awfully young,” Iwao said. Shinohara thought to himself that he could do without the reminder. “It wouldn’t be good for him to run into Jason.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! 
> 
> This chapter is quite a bit longer than usual, so I hope everyone enjoys! Interpreting scenes from the manga can be difficult, but it's also a lot of fun!
> 
> Please remember that comments and kudos are deeply appreciated! The tumblr tag for this fic is "fic: problem child", and you can find me on tumblr at [tinyghoulproblem](http://tinyghoulproblem.tumblr.com/).
> 
> Enjoy!

“Tomorrow!!!” Juuzou yelled out, dashing down the hall as they walked through the door of their apartment. He’d been bouncing off the walls all day, chattering on, not-so-subtly pointing out to Takizawa that he and Houji had to stay behind. The next day, they would head straight to the 11th ward instead of the 23rd, and begin going over battle plans. The raid was expected to last well into the night, so they were all instructed to get as much sleep as possible. But with Juuzou in a state like this, Shinohara wasn’t sure that they would be sleeping at all. Or at least, he wasn’t sure that Juuzou would. He was old enough now that sleep was an important factor of functionality. Watching Juuzou made him miss the days when he could go a day without sleeping, or with very little, and power through with just as much vigor and vitality as if he’d gotten his full eight hours. 

“Tomorrow tomorrow tomorrowtomorrowtomorrow!” Juuzou yelled, jumping up onto the couch and flipping over the back of it. 

“I’m gonna go right in and find the biggest, most dangerous ghoul there! And then I’ll have a quinque!” 

Shinohara sighed, setting his briefcase on the counter. “Juuzou, we’ve talked about this. You need to be careful! This isn’t like anything you’ve done before. A lot of men die in raids. It’s dangerous!”

“Well, I don’t care about that.”

“Well, that’s fine, but you still have to follow orders,” Shinohara replied, rubbing his temples. 

Juuzou groaned and collapsed melodramatically in a chair. “But I _need_ my quinque and you don’t even think the Binge Eater is alive. How else am I gonna get it?”

“You’ll get your chance,” Shinohara replied, “Now, I got hamburgers, so eat up.”

Juuzou stared as Shinohara took the food out of its plastic bag, then groaned and slumped down again. “I’m too excited to eat! They said that I get a new uniform, is it true?”

“Yep, with special body armor meant to deflect kagune. It’s not very effective though, especially against a bikaku or rinkaku. So you still have to be careful. And you have to eat, Juuzou, you need your energy.”

“Fine, fine.”

They tucked into their burgers, and even split a container of fries between them. Shinohara had to admit that it wasn’t a very healthy meal, but they’d been running late, and they’d had takeout every night this week. Whatever…he’d try to do better tomorrow. 

“Hey,” Juuzou spoke around a mouthful of fries, “How many raids have you been on?”

“Quite a few,” Shinohara shrugged. “I found you at a raid, so I think they’re good. At the same time, they are very dangerous…and I’m worried that we don’t have enough intel on this one.”

“Are you scared?”

“No…well, not really. I mean, I’m not sure what to expect, and I’m concerned about you, but I think it will be okay.”

“Why are you concerned about me?”

“Because you want to go in and find the strongest ghoul…and that’s dangerous.”

“I’ll be fine,” Juuzou shrugged.

“And you’re the only Rank 3 investigator who Maru pulled for the mission.”

“That’s because I’m better than the other ones.”

Shinohara laughed. “You’re probably right. Just…don’t run off by yourself, okay?”

Juuzou rolled his eyes and neglected to respond. Shinohara sighed and turned on the TV, trying to put the raid from his mind for just a bit. There would be plenty of time to prepare tomorrow; for now, he just wanted to relax. Juuzou shifted about on the couch until he was pressed up against Shinohara’s arm, wiggling expectantly. Shinohara lifted his arm and Juuzou pushed himself under it, curling into Shinohara’s side. They remained like that for a moment, then Shinohara felt a soft, warm hand sliding beneath his shirt, gliding over the sensitive skin of his stomach. He gasped softly—it was an unexpected feeling—and looked down at Juuzou. 

“What’s this?” he asked, his voice a little lower than he’d intended. 

“I’m bored. You can keep watching television.”

“No…I can do this…if you’d like.” He was looking at the top of Juuzou’s head, but he saw the curve of those cheeks change and knew that Juuzou was smiling. 

“Yeah,” Juuzou nodded, nimble fingers already fiddling with Shinohara’s shirt buttons. Shinohara turned the TV down until it was just a background hum, and Juuzou again settled in his lap, straddling his legs and facing him. Once he’d finished undoing the buttons, Juuzou spread Shinohara’s shirt open, revealing a white undershirt beneath it. 

“How come you wear so many shirts?” he asked.

“Well…because white shirts are sometimes…a little transparent.”

Juuzou hummed. “I only wear one shirt.”

“You really only need one shirt,” Shinohara shrugged. 

“It’s better,” Juuzou replied, pulling Shinohara’s hand toward his own buttons. Shinohara obliged, opening the shirt that used to belong to him, the shirt that was now saturated with Juuzou’s sweet scent. Briefly, he wondered what ghouls smelled when they smelled Juuzou, wondered if Juuzou’s scent was sweet because of his low hormonal output. But he didn’t have much time to wonder about it, as he was spreading Juuzou’s shirt open, looking at his pale chest for the second time in just a few short days. It was better like this, in the light of the living room rather than the dark of the moonlight. Shinohara always had been one for sex with the lights on—there was something about seeing the contours of his partner’s body that heightened the experience for him. 

And Juuzou was a sight to behold—soft wisps of white hair, pale lashes, the doll-like curve of his face, the pink of his lips—and now, with his shirt open, the lean, creamy skin of his chest, interrupted only by two soft, pink nipples. Shinohara wanted to touch every inch of him, wanted to explore him until he was a shaking, sweating, cursing mess. He caught himself in the thought and felt his cheeks grow warm, part guilt, part anticipation. A part of him still insisted that this was, at best, wholly inappropriate, but it was overcome by something far stronger than propriety. He’d already crossed that line; there was no going back now. 

A dark thought crossed his mind—what if this was their last night together? There was no predicting what might happen in a raid, and there was no guarantee that he would be able to protect Juuzou, or indeed that he would be able to protect himself. But instead of quelling his desire, the thought of this being their last chance—their _only_ chance—spurred him on. He slid Juuzou’s shirt off of his slender shoulders, letting his hands run down Juuzou’s arms as the shirt fell away. Juuzou grinned at him, and he smiled back. 

“What are you going to do?” Juuzou asked, mischief in his eyes.

“What do you want me to do?” 

Juuzou hummed thoughtfully, tapping one finger against his lips. 

“Well…I like kissing. But I wanna know what else you can do.”

Shinohara considered this for a moment, then asked, “Juuzou, do you know what parts of your body feel good when they’re touched?”

Juuzou shrugged, unsure.

“Alright…what if we find out?”

Juuzou smiled. “Yeah, I wanna know.”

Shinohara stood, Juuzou still clinging to him, legs wrapped around his waist, arms around his neck. Juuzou laughed, and Shinohara smiled…he was so compact, yet he felt so light and small like this. Shinohara carried him to the bed, turned on the lamp, and laid him down gently. Juuzou stretched his arms out and sighed, smiling expectantly. 

“Alright,” Shinohara said, stripping off his button-up shirt and climbing onto the bed, hovering over Juuzou’s body. “Let’s start from the top.”

“My head?” Juuzou asked.

“Yeah…there are a lot of sensitive spots on your head.”

“But that’s not where they start in the movies.”  
 Shinohara shrugged. “Those are just movies, Juuzou.”

“Okay,” Juuzou shrugged. “But if I don’t like it, you have to keep moving.”

“Will do,” Shinohara nodded. “Ready?”

Juuzou nodded, and Shinohara leaned down, placing a kiss on his lips. He continued on, kissing across Juuzou’s cheek and over to his ear. Then, slowly, he starting working on his ear, first kissing it, then sucking and nibbling his earlobe, then licking the shell of it softly. Juuzou squirmed at first, then whimpered quietly. Shinohara saw his eyes slip closed, and he moved his attentions to the space just below his ear, using his lips, his tongue, his teeth, carefully avoiding a mark of any kind. When Shinohara worked his way across Juuzou’s throat and up to his other ear, Juuzou began to giggle.

“What?” Shinohara asked softly.

“It’s weird!” Juuzou laughed, “You licked my _ear_!”

“You don’t like it?” 

“No, I…don’t stop, it’s just…” his breath caught in his throat as Shinohara licked at his ear again. “It’s just weird.”

“If something feels strange, but good, that’s okay,” Shinohara murmured, “If it feels bad, tell me to stop and I will.”

“Yeah,” Juuzou nodded, “But don’t stop okay?”

Shinohara nodded, one of his hands untangling from Juuzou’s hair and sliding down his body, searching for the tender skin of his nipple. When he found it, he pinched it up lightly, eliciting another gasp from Juuzou’s lips. 

“Woah,” Juuzou whispered, and Shinohara worked his way down and found the other nipple with his lips, with his teeth, lightly, with his tongue. Juuzou bucked and whimpered beneath him, his fingers wrapping around Shinohara’s head and pulling it down. Shinohara sucked on his nipples, then, each one in turn, until they were raised and hard, blushing red from the attention. Juuzou’s breathing was heavy, pale strands of hair were already sticking to the skin of his forehead, but Shinohara had no intentions of stopping. Instead he moved on from Juuzou’s chest and found the gentle curve of his ribcage, expanding and contracting with each breath. Shinohara nibbled at it, kissed it, licked a few long stripes, then took to flicking his tongue at it. Juuzou’s chest blushed pink and he squirmed, giggled, gave a soft, “Oh!”, and moaned softly. 

Shinohara let the roughness of his cheek drag down that tender skin, and Juuzou threw his head back into the pillows, arched his back, dug his hands into the blanket. Shinohara bit lightly at his hipbone, then sunk his teeth in harder. Juuzou cried out, scrabbled his nails at whatever part of Shinohara’s back he could reach, kicked his legs. 

“Is that good?” Shinohara asked.  
 Juuzou moaned back, his nod making up for what he couldn’t seem to piece together in words. Shinohara wasn’t as worried about leaving marks here, in the tender flesh of Juuzou’s hip. He unbuckled the belt that held Juuzou’s too-large pants up, but didn’t even need to bother with the zipper, the button. The slacks slid off easily, Juuzou kicking them away with his lean little legs. Shinohara threw the pants off the bed and went right back to Juuzou’s hip, pulling down one side of his briefs and sinking his teeth in slowly. Juuzou laughed, bucked, and laughed again. 

“It feels good!” he giggled, and Shinohara found himself chuckling as well, letting Juuzou’s skin slip from between his teeth and licking the reddened impression they’d left behind. 

“Again!” Juuzou called out, pushing at Shinohara’s head with his fingertips. Shinohara might have guessed that Juuzou would be a demanding sort in bed, but he’d always liked demanding, pushy bottoms. Usually, the men he was with were more experienced, older, more aware of what they enjoyed. Juuzou was young and incredibly inexperienced, but he was taking to the sins of the flesh with the same level of gusto and enthusiasm he did everything else. Shinohara pressed forward, leaving ring after ring of deep red impressions on Juuzou’s hips and thighs, while Juuzou giggled and squirmed. 

Finally, he slid Juuzou’s briefs away and tossed them aside, revealing his scars, the lump of flesh between his legs. Again, Juuzou looked to him as if waiting for a reaction, but Shinohara smiled and leaned down, his lips finding Juuzou’s neck again. 

“Do you know what nerves are, Juuzou?” he whispered, breath blowing against Juuzou’s neck, just under his ear. 

“Yeah, it’s how you feel stuff,” Juuzou nodded. “Why?”

“Well, there are a lot of nerves here,” Shinohara ghosted his hand over Juuzou’s pelvis, “All around here. I think you’ll still feel good, even though you have scars.”

“Really?” Juuzou asked, “How come you know so much about this?”

“I’ve…been doing this for a long time,” Shinohara smiled. “Every body is different, did you know that? So it’s okay if yours is different.”

“What about your body? Why are you still wearing clothes?”

Shinohara shrugged. “We’ll get to that. Maybe.”

“Okay,” Juuzou shrugged, “But please keep doing things to me right now. I don’t like it when you stop.”

Shinohara laughed and kissed his way back down Juuzou’s naked torso, wreathing Juuzou’s hips and pelvis in kisses, working his way around while Juuzou bucked and cursed. He took his time, licking his way slowly across Juuzou’s flesh, mentally taking note of the places and techniques that made him get particularly vocal. He felt as though, with enough time and experience, he might be able to stimulate an orgasm, regardless of the state of Juuzou’s body. He didn’t really expect to be able to do it tonight, but he wanted to bring Juuzou as much pleasure as he could. 

Finally, he kissed his way back up Juuzou’s torso, and Juuzou, sweating, shaking, sighing, met his lips. 

“It’s so nice,” he whispered, his eyes sliding open and, heavy lidded, focusing on Shinohara’s. “Everything feels so nice.”

“Now you know why people do it so much,” Shinohara laughed.

“Was that…sex?” Juuzou asked, pushing damp locks of hair from his forehead.

“That was…one way to be sexual,” Shinohara shrugged. “There’s more to do, though.”

“Like what?”

Shinohara opened his mouth, closed it again. Juuzou spoke so frankly about everything, and Shinohara knew that euphemism would be lost on him. 

“I have an idea,” Juuzou said slyly. Before Shinohara had a chance to wonder what he was up to, Juuzou was already unbuttoning his pants, sliding down the zipper. 

“How about it’s my turn now?” Juuzou muttered slyly.

“Alright,” Shinohara said, still looming over Juuzou. He was hard, almost painfully hard, and the sight of Juuzou, sweaty and undone, wasn’t making anything easier. So he succumbed to Juuzou’s hand, helped it pull his cock free from his underwear through the fly, and groaned as Juuzou began to touch it, began to try and navigate what Shinohara could only assume was his first hand job. 

“Like this,” Shinohara murmured, adjusting Juuzou’s grip on his cock. “Now, don’t go too fast right at first…good…” his breath caught in his throat, “Good boy…”

“Good-boy god-boy,” Juuzou whispered to himself in a sing-song voice, pumping Shinohara’s cock slowly. 

It felt delicious, and after all that time working Juuzou’s body over, Shinohara didn’t think he would last very long. Still, he told Juuzou to speed up a little bit, now, to move his hand this way or that. Juuzou was a quick learner, and soon enough the instructions ceased, and it was all that Shinohara could do to moan, to keep himself propped up on the bed, Juuzou’s body wiggling on the covers beneath him. 

With a shout and a moan, he felt himself come, hot sticky strings shooting out over Juuzou’s torso. Juuzou giggled wildly and kept pumping Shinohara’s cock, and when he knew he couldn’t possibly come anymore, he had to pull Juuzou’s hand away. With a moan, he rolled on the bed, reaching over and groping blindly for some tissues that Juuzou could use to wipe himself down. Once Juuzou was clean, he curled himself under Shinohara’s arm and into his side. Shinohara sighed, relaxed, and kissed the top of Juuzou’s head. 

“That felt so good,” he muttered, “You’re a natural.”

“Good,” Juuzou hummed contentedly. “Let’s do more.”

“After the raid,” Shinohara murmured, sleep already rolling over him. “After the raid.”

***

“This is our entry point,” Marude barked, the red dot of his laser pointer hovering over the diagram of the ghoul headquarters. There were hundreds of people in the room—it was the biggest room that the CCG had. Still, they had to siphon off three hundred or so investigators into a side room to watch the orders from a screen. It was one of the largest operations in CCG history, around one thousand investigators in total, and still, Shinohara felt uneasy. It wasn’t good to go in like this, partially blinded and unsure of what awaited them. They had limited intel on who to expect, a few big-shot ghouls they imagined would be there, a vague estimate of the total ghouls, but for the most part it was a crapshoot. 

In order to combat the uncertainty, Marude had gone big: one thousand investigators, RC bullets, Special Class investigators, satellite coverage, helicopters over the area, a full evacuation of the citizenry. He wasn’t taking any chances, or so he’d claimed to the news reporters. In reality, Shinohara thought that he might be taking far too many chances, that all these precautions would simply be hot air blown by a man anxious to procure a promotion and a raise, and that the lives lost by the end of the day would not amount to the outcome they so desperately sought. 

Still, he tried to remain optimistic. As always, he would go in with the full acceptance that he might not leave the mission alive. Indomitable. He had the assurance of knowing that Iwachi would be there—the two of them were both Arata users, in fact, they were the only two investigators who were determined to be strong enough to use it. With the Arata armor, they became stronger, faster…but at a price. Further, the armor was still in its prototype stages, but it still enabled them to go up against some of the strongest ghouls and sustain far less damage. It was a tradeoff: blood for blood. Shinohara hoped that he wold not need it, but he was wearing the apparatus that contained it regardless. 

When the orders had been given, they split up into squads and reconvened for the further, more specialized plans that each group developed. Shinohara went over the finer points of where they would meet and how they hoped to infiltrate the building. There was a break for food, and then it was time to suit up. Shinohara was given both his own gear and Juuzou’s, and he smiled when he saw the difference in the sizes. Juuzou’s uniform and vest had been custom-made to his measurements; he was so small, it was practically child-sized. Shinohara’s gear was custom-made as well, but primarily because he was taller and broader than nearly all of the investigators. he’d had his for longer, it had seen a few missions and had been repaired and remade several times over. 

“Woah,” Juuzou gasped as he held his kagune-resistant vest up. “This is cool. I wanna wear it all the time!”

Shinohara laughed. “These are expensive, specialized equipment. They rarely let us wear them.”

“Damn,” Juuzou muttered, and Shinohara raised a brow at him. They were in the locker room at the main office, surrounded by investigators who were chattering, changing clothes, each one covering his trepidation with wisecracks and smiles. Shinohara wondered how many of them would emerge from this raid alive. 

He changed quickly and Juuzou followed suit, Shinohara helping him with the various buttons and zippers that made the suit secure. When they were done, Juuzou hopped up on the bench, jumped down, and kicked his legs high into the air. 

“I bet I can kill a lot of ghouls in this!” he exclaimed with a grin.

“I sure hope so,” Shinohara replied. “Alright, let’s go find Amon and the others.”

Juuzou sped off, leaving Shinohara to walk behind him, his heavy boots clunking down the hall. The rest of it passed in a blur—meeting up, getting on the bus, making the drive from the 1st ward to the 11th as night began to fall. Juuzou was uncharacteristically quiet, pressing his face to the bus window and taking in the city as it passed them by. Shinohara watched him, willing his mind not to wander, willing himself not to think about what it might be like if the worst were to happen. He wouldn’t go there…couldn’t. He had to think about the task at hand.

Finally, they arrived, disembarked from the busses, and began to move in. Shinohara’s group was one of the supports, meant to go in after the initial wave had entered the building. But the operation quickly ground to a halt; the first wave of the infiltration team had been gunned down by a sniper. The news rippled through the ranks. What were ghouls doing with a sniper? The CCG was aware that equipment had been stolen from the 11th ward branch office, but they hadn’t really expected the ghouls to know how to use it. Somehow, they got the information that the sniper was a former mercenary who must have instructed the ghouls in how to use the guns. On top of that, they had shields made of kagune, which were keeping them safe from the bullets of the CCG. It was a decidedly inauspicious start. 

Time stretched on, and Juuzou huffed and sighed laboriously, trying for a closer look before falling back and pacing around Shinohara and Amon. 

“Why aren’t we attacking?” he finally whined out, frustrated and impatient.

“We aren’t _able_ to attack,” Amon replied. Shinohara was more than happy to let Amon explain this one. “It’s the guns that the ghouls stole from the 11th branch…they’re taking us out from the upper floors.”

“We could just go around the other side,” Juuzou pointed out.

Amon shook his head. “Nah, it’s too dangerous. We don’t know what’s waiting for us there, and furthermore, the sea is on the other side. The whole complex is surrounded by forest, which the ghouls know better than we do. So it’s difficult to find another entry point, and even if we did, we have no idea what kind of traps they have set up. So we’re…out of good options, really.”

“How come we fight the ghouls with guns anyway?” Juuzou frowned. “Bullets wont pass through kagune, right?”

“Normal metal bullets won’t,” Amon replied. “But these are special bullets, called Q bullets.” 

He handed one to Juuzou, who held it delicately in his gloved fingers. 

“They’re coated in melted-down kagune. There’s one for each type of kagune. If you used the right type of bullet for a specific ghoul, it can be somewhat effective. But only somewhat.”

“Oh really?” Juuzou giggled, “Mr. Amon, you know everything, don’t you?”

Shinohara sighed. “The coating is very thin, since the materials come from ghouls. So if you’re fighting one-on-one, it’s best to go ahead and use a quinque. And a long-range quinque beats out a bullet any day. Wish I had one for this raid…it’d be even better if we had Arima here.”

“Will my scorpion be effective?” Juuzou asked, brows raised.

“Should be,” Shinohara answered, “But don’t go up against any really strong ghouls. If you come across Jason or the Bin Brothers, keep your distance or you’ll get killed.” 

Juuzou snorted and turned his attention back to Amon. “I wanna see your quinque, Mr. Amon. It’s a what-kaku?”

“A koukaku,” Amon muttered. 

“Amon is skilled with heavy quinques,” Shinohara chimed in. “Due to his physical strength and training.”

“Huh….” Juuzou looked thoughtful, then held his hands out. “Please lend it to me, Mr. Amon. Or some other quinque would be fine too.”

“No way,” Amon shook his head. 

“Hey, Shinohara!” a voice called out. 

Shinohara turned and grinned. “Hey Iwacchi, what’s up? How things up front?”

“Not great,” Iwao shrugged. “We’re totally deadlocked. Marude is pissed. We’re trying to figure out another route, but it’s tough…this was our best shot. But ghouls with human weaponry…and training, for that matter…well, it’s nothing to sniff at. Marude's trying to get us some tanks.”

“Shit,” Shinohara muttered, scratching the back of his head. 

“Mr. Shinohara?” Juuzou’s voice broke in.

“Hmm?” 

“Whose bike is that?” 

Shinohara looked in the direction that Juuzou pointed. “It’s Marude’s. He rode it here to show off.” 

A dark look passed over Juuzou’s face, and Shinohara couldn’t help but think of the scene from a few days earlier, when Marude insulted Juuzou and questioned his gender. 

“Anyway,” Iwao said, “I just thought that I would come over here and give you guys an update.”

“What do you think is gonna happen?” Shinohara asked, looking up at the complex dubiously. “You think we’re even gonna be able to get inside?” 

Iwao shrugged. “I don’t think Maru is gonna leave until we do. He’s determined to make his way in there, no matter what. But I don’t think tanks are a good idea.”

“Me neither.” Shinohara muttered, rubbing his hand over his face. “This is a whole new thing, isn’t it, Iwaccho? I’ve never seen ghouls organize like this.”

Iwao nodded. “It’s like an army. I guess that this is the future we’re heading toward. Here in the 11th ward, they weren’t prepared…they didn’t even know what was happening until it was too late. A lot of good men lost their lives here. So I guess…even if we have to use the tanks, I’d rather use them than let the ghouls take over the 11th ward.”

“I guess you’re right,” Shinohara conceded. 

Just then, Shinohara heard some commotion and turned around. At first, he couldn’t believe his eyes; Juuzou was on Maru’s bike, revving the engine and spinning the tires. For a moment, everything went into slow motion—Juuzou taking off on the bike just as Maru grabbed him, speeding forward while Maru flew behind him. Shinohara heard himself yelling Juuzou’s name at the top of his lungs, but Juuzou wasn’t listening anymore. 

“Let go, you moron!” Shinohara yelled at Maru now, hoping to have more of an effect. Maru let go, and Juuzou sped off, the bike roaring beneath him. Shinohara’s heart leapt into his throat as he watched Juuzou fly into the air on the bike, climb up on the seat, and launch himself an impossible distance before shooting elegantly through a small window. First, shouts filled the air, then the sharp retort of gunfire. Shinohara didn’t breathe, just watched the light of the gunshots strobe behind the glass. Then, just as fast as it began, it was over. Just as he was getting ready to yell for Juuzou, just as he was sure that all was lost, Juuzou’s grinning face appeared in the window, the heads of two decapitated, bullet-riddled ghouls dangling from his fingers.

“You can come in now!” He yelled across the grounds. Shinohara gulped in a breath, and for a few seconds, everyone just stood there in shock. The spell was broken by Maru’s scream.

“Charge! Go, go, god dammit!”

Shinohara could swear Maru was crying. 

He looked over at Amon, who was staring at the window with wide eyes. “What…” he muttered, but Shinohara clapped his back. 

“C’mon,” he said, “Orders, right?”

“Yeah,” Amon replied, dazed. Juuzou disappeared inside the building. Shinohara felt a pang of worry; he’d told Juuzou not to go alone, not to go after the stronger ghouls, but this showy antic seemed to prove that he had no intention on complying with those requests. Still…even though they were partners, Shinohara had no choice but to let him go. He couldn’t babysit Juuzou, and as a Special Class investigator, he certainly couldn’t afford to get distracted on such an important and potentially dangerous mission. So he drew a breath, steeled his nerves, and began moving in, Amon by his side.

They infiltrated the building, coming across small groups of ghouls in identical, skull-like masks. Shinohara fought side-by-side with Amon and Iwao, each of them taking out ghouls with ease. It was hard, bloody work, but compared to some of the battles that Shinohara had fought, it was fairly low-level. But Shinohara was not fooled—it only meant that the stronger ghouls had sent the weaker ones in the first wave, letting them die first in the time-honored tradition of war. Wear down the enemy by engaging them in a abundance of fairly low-grade fights. Due to simple rules of human endurance, they would be exhausted and worn down by the time they reached the higher-level, more skilled opponents, who would then easily take them out. Maru was hoping to avoid this through a simple numbers game—throw as many investigators in the battle as possible, and decrease the exhaustion levels of the group. As Shinohara sliced his way through yet another group, he hoped that Maru’s strategy would work. 

“That boy you’re partnered with…his name is Suzuya, right?” Iwao asked.

“Yeah,” Shinohara nodded. They were making their way down another hallway now, steadily working their way through the building. 

“He’s awfully young,” Iwao said. Shinohara thought to himself that he could do without the reminder. “It wouldn’t be good for him to run into Jason.”

“Mr. Kuroiwa,” Amon piped up, “You’re a part of the 13th ward, aren’t you?”

“Sure am,” Kuroiwa nodded. “When the number of ghouls in a ward increases, the cannibalism there increases too. The 13th ward is no exception. It’s rare, but sometimes ghouls who engage in cannibalism develop a kagune that envelopes their bodies like armor. Our best guess is that cannibalism increases the RC cell count, giving them that mutation in their kagune. It appears that Jason has developed that kind of kagune…it’s called a ‘kakuja,’ for convenience sake. Anyway, if you run into one, it’s a hell of a fight. Guaranteed. Even with a full-size quinque, they’re tough to beat.”

Amon nodded. They rounded a corner, and stepped slowly down another empty hallway. 

“Mr. Shinohara,” Amon continued, “Have you ever battled a kakuja?”

Shinohara nodded. “I did…it was terrible. Just the memory of it gives me chills. It was about…ten years ago. You’ve heard of the battle with the Owl, right?”

“Of course.”

“Yeah, I thought so. I hear stories about it floating around the CCG, even now. Most of them are about Arima’s heroism…” he smiled. “Anyway, Mado and I formed a trio with Mr. Ida, our superior. We joined up with Marude and Arima, who was just a Rank 2 back then. Our target was the triple-S rank ‘Owl.’ The battle was incredibly brutal. Every single Special Class was killed in that battle.” 

Ten years later, the memory was still fresh in his mind. It had been a terrible, painful battle, and the casualties had been felt for years…were still being felt, by many. 

“Well,” Iwao said, clapping a hand on Shinohara’s shoulder. “Let’s fight hard, okay?”

“Yep,” Shinohara nodded. “We still haven’t found any high-ranking ghouls. Let’s keep looking.”

With that, they continued, making their way through the halls. Once the first building was cleared, it was on the the next. Many investigators had gotten there first, and there were only a few ghouls to take out. it was going smoothly, so far…so smoothly, in fact, that Shinohara started to feel a bit uneasy. In one hallway, they found corpses riddled with bullet holes and stab wounds. The mess of it was familiar, and Shinohara swallowed thickly and sighed. 

“Juuzou was here,” he nodded. “This is his work.” 

Iwao laughed softly. “You know, that kid is small, but damn, he can fight.”

“It’s true,” Shinohara scratched the back of his neck. “Seems like he took all these guys out by himself.” 

“Incredible,” Amon muttered. 

They rounded another hallway and found a few ghouls feasting on the remains of some investigators. Amon and Shinohara teamed up and took them all out. Iwao leaned down to make sure that the investigators were dead, then nodded slowly. 

“They’re beyond help now. Let’s go.” 

Amon looked as if he would be sick, but he followed behind them. Shinohara steeled himself to the horror, to the pain, and pressed forward. This was war. This was what happened in war. 

The second building was cleared. 

“Where should we go next?” Amon called out. 

“We probably need to go back up the second squad,” Shinohara replied. 

“Even though there are so many ghouls, we have yet to encounter any that are above Rank B,” Amon observed. “It’s just…so many.”

“I know,” Shinohara frowned. “We might be getting close to Jason, or the Bin Brothers.”

“Misato,” Iwao turned to one of the other investigators in the group. “Do you have Emelio?”

“Yes,” Misato replied with a nod. “And I’ve made all of the necessary adjustments.”

“Is that an ukaku quinque? That would come in handy for the mid and long-range attacks,” Amon pointed out. “But it runs out of fuel quickly, huh?”

Misato glared at Amon. “What are you staring at?” She snapped. Shinohara raised a brown and looked over at Iwao. He didn’t know what that was all about, but they didn’t have time to squabble over anything right now. 

“Special Class Kuroiwa,” Take said, coming up next to them. “If we exit here, we’ll be in building 4.”

“Alright,” Iwao nodded. “That means the next building is the last of the southern buildings. Let’s go through it like we are now. Follow me!”

But as they turned and entered a large room, Shinohara was arrested with a terrifyingly familiar sight. He threw an arm out, catching Iwao in the chest. His eyes said what his lips didn’t need to—Iwao followed his gaze, and immediately froze. 

_The Owl._

“Halt!” Iwao yelled out. 

“What’s he doing here?” Shinohara whispered, too dumbstruck to speak the words out loud. 

“Mr. Shinohara?” Amon asked, puzzled. 

“It’s him,” Shinohara replied softly. “The One-Eyed Owl.”

The news of it rippled through their group. Shinohara tightened his grip on his quinque and pushed away his fear. There would be no time for fear, no time for emotion. There was only the Owl. The Owl, and nothing else. 

“The young man who snatched away both my arms…he’s not here?” The Owl croaked out, his voice low, menacing. “Ah, Shinohara…I’ve heard a lot of gossip about you over the years. Makes me think I should have taken your arms, just like I did to your superior.”

Shinohara glared at him, said nothing. He would not be taunted.

“Shinohara!” Maru’s voice crackled in his earpiece. “Keep only the excellent but expendable guys with you. Send the rest away. If you guys can’t overcome him, then no one can. I don’t want to throw lives away on an impossible battle. Challenge him with the fewest number of investigators possible. That’s all.”

Shinohara took a deep breath and nodded. “Chinomushi,” he called over to one of the lower-ranked investigators.

“Yes, sir!” the man replied. He looked so afraid, already slicking down with sweat. Shinohara felt badly for him. Maru was right…it wasn’t fun to hear, but he was right about this one. These lower-ranked investigators would be nothing but cannon-fodder at this point, as useless as an Q bullet against the One-Eyed Owl.

“Take everyone with you to building seven.”

He turned to Iwao, how gave him a meaningful look. “Iwaccho,” he muttered softly. 

“Yeah,” Iwao replied, knitting his brows. He knew the order…he’d heard it over his own earpiece. This was up to them and just a few others. They couldn’t justify any more than that. 

“Hira,” Shinohara called out, hoping that he wasn’t sending the man to his death, “You’re staying.”

“Yes, sir,” Take replied.

“Anyone from the 13th ward above the higher ranks, stay with me,” Iwao nodded. A chorus of “Yes, sir!” rose from the group as the higher-ranked investigators began to separate from the group. 

“Mr Shinohara?” Amon asked, eyes wide. 

“Amon,” Shinohara turned to him, “You’re going to building seven.”

“Why?” Amon yelled out, eyes wide. “I want to fight by your side!”

“Amon, that was a superior’s order, you know,” Shinohara looked at him, offering a small smile to soften the blow. “You must obey.”

“But I don’t want to feel the way I felt that day…with Mado…” Amon gathered himself and stood at his full height. “I’m staying! Please allow me to fight by your side, Mr. Shinohara!”

Shinohara sighed. “Jeez,” he mumbled. Unbidden, a memory of Amon swam before his eyes. It was during his academy days…he’d always been such a serious student, and now, here, in this battle, he was just as serious of an investigator. Shinohara shook his head. “You haven’t changed at all, have you?”

Amon stared at him defiantly. 

“Rank one Amon,” Shinohara stepped closer to him. 

“Ye-…” Amon began to answer, but he was interrupted by the force of Shinohara’s fist connecting with his cheek. Shinohara didn’t hit him with his full strength, but it was still enough to knock Amon back, especially as he hadn’t expected the punch. 

“I told you, that was a superior’s order. Go on.”

Amon rubbed his face, looking like he was about to weep. 

“And Amon,” Shinohara stared at him, his gaze hard. “Don’t underestimate the special classes. You are an excellent and _not_ expendable guy. So go.”

“Yes, sir,” Amon muttered, looking down at the floor. He pushed himself up to his feet, brushed off his pants, and walked over to the exiting group, trying to hold his head up high. Shinohara watched him go, then shook his head. 

“Hirako,” Shinohara turned to Take, who was standing at his side. “What’s the highest-ranked ghoul you’ve suppressed?”

“An S-Ranked ukaku,” Take answered. 

“Okay then,” Shinohara nodded. They were terribly outmatched, but with he and Iwao, they might have stood a chance.

“So…I’m expendable?” Take asked, leveling his gaze at the Owl.

“No, that isn’t quite it,” Shinohara countered, but Take continued. 

“It’s fine, I understand.”

“Shinohara…Iwao…where are your quinques?” another investigator asked. 

“Oh,” Shinohara nodded. “We’re already wearing them.” With that, he pressed the button down at his neck, held it down for three seconds, and let go. Immediately, he felt the strange sensation of his kakuja quinque spreading over his body, covering his entire torso inches by inch. It fit close, like armor, and was every bit as hard and flexible as any other kagune. It was a fierce, fearsome weapon. Shinohara had only used it a few times, and he still wasn’t entirely accustomed to the feeling of it. Still, the effects were immediate—a surge of energy, of strength, of power. He grabbed up his kagune and looked over at Iwao, who nodded. They were ready. 

They had trained for this when the Arata quinque was first given to them. They had an arsenal of joint attacks, the two of them moving in, feinting this way and that, throwing off the Owl and trying to get their hits in before falling back and beginning again. With the Arata, they moved fast, but not fast enough to dodge the Owl’s attack. He sent a shower of kagune shards at them like a hail of bullets, and Shinohara felt them skimming off of his armor like pebbles. Without the Arata, he would have been severely injured, perhaps even killed. With it, he was largely invulnerable to projectiles, and the areas that weren’t covered by the Arata were easy to block with the quinque he held in his hand. 

Despite the strength of the Arata, they still weren’t getting close. No matter how they attacked, it was an impossible situation. From far away, the owl could attack them by propelling pieces of kagune at them. When they got close, his own armor kept them from landing any serious damage. Then, he would hit them and send them flying away, and the whole thing would start again. Shinohara didn’t feel the bruises on his body or the sweat on his brow; every ounce of concentration that he possessed was focused on the Owl. 

He looked over in time to catch Take’s eye. Take gave him a grave look and nodded, then ran toward the Owl. Shinohara nodded to Kuroiwa and they began running as well. Perhaps with the three of them, perhaps with Take’s experience working under Arima, perhaps they could have a chance against this monster. Take landed a hit, but it didn’t land hard enough—the Owl sliced the side of his face before he could get away. Right as Take fell away, Shinohara and Iwao brought their quinques down in punishing arcs, each of them making contact simultaneously. The Owl roared out, the volume of his cry nearly deafening to Shinohara’s ears as he fell to the floor. He looked up, expectant, but the Owl’s wounds were already healing, strings of flesh spreading across the bloody expanse left by their blades, the shell of the kakuja already growing to protect the wound. 

Shinohara cursed. 

“This is tough,” he said to Iwao, who was crouching down on one knee, wiping the sweat from his brow. 

“Yeah, it is,” Iwao agreed, “Even with the Arata…this is…”

Then, Iwao was on his feet, running at the Owl again on his own. Shinohara watched helplessly as the Owl repelled Iwao with a swipe of his kagune, as Iwao went flying across the floor. Shinohara called out his name, but there was nothing he could do. The Owl let loose another barrage of kagune, and Iwao covered his face with his forearms to avoid it. Shinohara took the chance to rush at the Owl yet again, bringing his quinque down with crushing force. A lesser ghoul would have been decimated by the blow, but he wasn’t going to stop. While the Owl was stunned, he slashed at him again and again and again, each blow landing hard and hitting home. The Owl swiped at him with its kagune and Shinohara ducked down just in time to keep himself from being decapitated. 

Still, he was undaunted. He leapt into the air and brought his quinque down on the Owl again, trying to create an opening for a lethal blow. Then he had done it; the Owl was stunned, its defenses down. He had a clear shot for its mask and he took it, slicing his blade cross the Owl’s eyes. The Owl roared and kicked him away, but he landed on his feet, sliding backwards across the concrete floor and looking up to see the damage he’d inflicted. 

It wasn’t enough. Shinohara cursed again. It wasn’t going to be enough. 

Gunfire exploded in the room as the backup investigators opened fire on the Owl, but the bullets simply ricocheted off of him, creating more of a hazard than a help. The gunfire stopped, and Shinohara looked over at Iwao. It would have taken ten men, maybe more, to win this fight…they were two, three with Take, and he was already bleeding from the face. They were sweaty, bloody, covered in dirt. It was clear that they were tiring. The fight was already lost. Shinohara found himself relieved that Juuzou was not here. Perhaps he would make it. Perhaps he would be okay. Good investigators had lost life and limb to the Owl. There was no shame in it. 

Still, he was not ready to give up. And from the look in Iwao’s eyes, he wasn’t going to be fighting alone. 

“Iwaccho,” he muttered. Iwao grunted back at him. “Just how far can we take it with these prototypes?”

“Are you planning something reckless?” Iwao asked, breathing heavily. 

“I’ll try it,” Shinohara muttered, fixing his gaze on the Owl. Iwao stared at him for a moment, eyes wide, then nodded. “I’ll join you.”

Each of them stood to their full height, then they pressed the spot of the armor that covered the backs of their necks. Shinohara felt his armor shudder, then spread, strengthen. The pain was intense, but so was the rush—it was like being swallowed alive, but it was also as if time, as if the world itself moved more slowly around him, as if the weight of his body was lifting, as if gravity itself was losing its pull. He nodded to Iwao, and they ran. 

Their attacks became relentless. Each of them sliced at the Owl again and again, jumping so high they could land on the ceiling, moving so fast that even then Owl began to become overwhelmed. It was working…but the pain was getting sharper, deeper. Shinohara felt himself being pulled down, down, down, deeper into the suit, into the armor, his body reacting to the violence of being eaten alive for the sake of a battle. He swung his quinque and blood splattered, but he could no longer tell if it was coming from himself or the Owl. He heard voices, but he wasn’t sure where they were coming from or who they belonged to. A guttural yell rang out, but he wasn’t sure if it emanated from his own throat, or from Iwao’s. They were winning, but he wasn’t sure if they could defeat the Owl before the Arata managed to eat them alive. 

For a moment, they fell back. Breath coming hard, Iwao gasped, “The power is incredible, but the burden is heavy,”

“A suit that eats the wearer is extreme…even for the CCG,” Shinohara replied. But the suit was overwhelming him. He gasped, cried out; there was blood in his eyes, in his mouth. His body was on fire, the pain searing and strong. All at once, his legs buckled and went out from beneath him. The floor came up hard and fast, and though he tried to struggle to his feet, there was nothing he could do. The Owl hadn’t managed to kill him, but the suit would. 

“The safety!” he called out to Iwao, “It’s broken!”

“What?” 

“It’s eating me…if I don’t get out of this, it’s going to eat me alive!”

“What a terrible weapon,” a dark, deep voice filled the room. Shinohara knew it was the Owl, knew it in his bones. It was the voice of a monster. 

“The world keeps giving birth to anger and sadness and people who scramble to kill each other,” the Owl continued, “And it goes without saying that both sides try to justify their actions…your suits are proof of that. There is no good reason to kill someone. That doesn’t exist. The act of taking a life is an act of evil.”

“What?” Shinohara asked, confused. The Owl, who had killed so many…the Owl was preaching to them about the sanctity of life. Had he not been confused, had he not been in such excruciating pain, Shinohara might have laughed. The Owl continued.

“If it’s true that something like souls exist, then the Arata doesn’t seem to want to lend you his power.”

The statement hung heavy in the air. 

“It’s time.” With that, the Owl pulled up the hood of his cloak and made a run for the broken window. 

“Quick! He’s escaping!” One of the men yelled, but Shinohara shook his head slowly. 

“No…we’re being allowed to escape. He doesn’t need to escape anything.”

“Shinohara!” Iwao cried out, “We’re getting this thing off of you. You! Call Marude and get some medics up here right now!”

Shinohara heard footsteps running out the door, and though he tried to object, to say that he was fine, the words wouldn’t come. It was the suit…the excruciating pain. He did need medics. He needed them quickly. 

“Shinohara,” Iwao muttered, “At the first Owl battle, many people were killed…but then in the second one, many people were injured, but no one died, right?”

“Yeah,” Shinohara grunted out between breaths. 

“Just like today,” Iwao continued. “It’s seems to me like the Owl has already changed.”

Shinohara tried to tell Iwao that he was right, but the pain was too much to bear. He opened his mouth to speak, but a scream emerged. Then, the world went black.


	8. Recovery

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Days bled one into the other, passing in a haze of morphine, hospital food, sips of water, and consultations with the doctor. Iwao was discharged, but came to visit often enough, and even downloaded some audiobooks to Shinohara’s phone so that he wouldn’t be as bored. More than anything, he slept, but when he wasn’t asleep, he was wondering about Juuzou. He tried texting Juuzou once or twice, but he knew that Juuzou barely touched his phone, and when he did, it was only to play video games. True to form, his texts were never answered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone!
> 
> A huge thank you to tumblr user amdis and my partner for being very encouraging. it really helped me with writing this chapter, so thank you both!
> 
> Your comments and kudos really mean a lot to me! I treasure every one :)
> 
> You can find me on tumblr at [tinyghoulproblem](http://tinyghoulproblem.tumblr.com/). Please enjoy!

He woke slowly, awareness coming back in bits and pieces. The first sound he heard was the beeping of his heart, mapped and charted through a monitor above the bed. It took a few seconds to connect the sound to his environment, but even with his eyes closed, he recognized the sounds and smells of the hospital. He had been here before. He had awoken this way before. 

He cracked one eye open experimentally, then shut it quickly. Everything was bright; he must have been close to a window, curtains opened. What idiot left the curtain open? He tried to move his arms, but moaned deeply as fire bloomed in his limbs, in his brain. He became aware of the fact that everything hurt… _everything_ , as if he’d been hit by a truck. With a deep breath, he opened his eyes again, squinting against the sunlight. 

The room was sparsely appointed, but a vase of flowers stood on the windowsill. Beside it, Iwao sat slumped in a chair, snoring softly. Shinohara tried to smile, but his face hurt too much to move. Slowly, he began pawing for the red button that would call a nurse—whatever they were giving him for the pain, he wanted more of it. This wasn’t enough. He managed to press the button, then laid back again, sighing softly. Arata sure had done a number on him this time…even breathing hurt. Still, he’d done what he had to at the time. He was sure that he would recover, that he would be fine. He always was. 

The door creaked open a few minutes later, and he looked up to see a nurse walking in. 

“Mr. Shinohara, did you need something?”

“Uh,” he croaked, and it dawned on him that he was terribly thirsty. “Pain,” he managed to say, and the nurse nodded. 

“I’ll get you something for that right away.”

Just then, Iwao jerked awake, his eyes darting straight to Shinohara. 

“Hey, buddy,” He grinned, his gruff voice betraying his relief. “Good to see you with us.”

Shinohara tried to nod, winced, and finally said, “Thanks Iwacchi.”

“You need something?” Iwao asked.

“Water,” Shinohara rasped. Iwao jumped into action, quickly pouring some from a pitcher into a cup with a straw. 

“Drink up,” he said, holding the straw to Shinohara’s lips. This wasn’t the first time they’d been here, Shinohara confined to a hospital bed, Iwao injured, but well enough to help. Sometimes it was the other way around—Shinohara had brought a straw to Iwao’s lips before, and at other times, they had both been confined to their beds. It was amazing how many times they’d fought together, how many times each of them had nearly died. Shinohara wondered, for a moment, how long this could go on before one of them didn’t wake up. It was a dark thought, and he pushed it away as he sucked down the small cup of water. Iwao refilled it and set it on a tray by the bed. 

Just then, the nurse came back and smiled as she injected something into his IV line. 

“Thanks,” he said softly, voice rough, but better after drinking. 

“Of course,” the nurse said. “The doctor will be in to check on you soon. Please rest until then.”

When she was gone, Shinohara turned his head painstakingly and looked at Iwao. He was a little worse for the wear, truth be told, his head and arms bandaged carefully, one eye blackened. Shinohara shuddered to think what he must look like, and was glad not to have a mirror. Suddenly, he was struck by the terrifying thought that he had no idea what had become of Juuzou. The last time he’s seen him, Juuzou had been holding the heads of two ghouls and grinning. But anything could have happened. _Anything_. 

“Juuzou?” he asked, gut in knots, heart racing on the monitor. 

“He’s fine,” Iwao shook his head. “Don’t worry about that one. He managed to bag Jason. Dragged him all the way through the building, but said he didn’t know how to harvest the kakuhou. He barely had a scratch on him. Lucky kid, if you ask me.”

“I don’t…think it’s…luck,” Shinohara rasped, but he sighed with relief and settled his head back down on his pillows. His heart monitor slowed down. If Iwao found it off that Shinohara’s heart pounded like that at the thought of Juuzou being hurt or killed, he didn’t say so. “You…okay?”

“Doing better than you are,” Iwao chuckled. “Got a cracked rib, some bruises and cuts is all. Anyway, just rest. I’ll catch you up later.”

Shinohara felt the pain medication kicking in, waves of relief washing over his body. Sleep sounded good now. He could nap until the doctor showed up and hope he wasn’t due any bad news.

***

When the doctor arrived, Shinohara came around slowly. The doctor shook his head and used the words “lucky to be alive” as he explained that he had deep bruising, extreme blood loss, countless skin lacerations, a few broken ribs, and some serious muscle damage. Shinohara listened as best he could, and tried to nod, but the pain shot up his neck with the effort. The doctor scolded him gently, and after that, he simply acknowledged the doctor with hums.

“You’re going to be off the job for awhile,” the doctor said, “But we’ll send you home as soon as possible. Do you have someone there to care for you?”

Shinohara considered Juuzou for a moment, then replied, “Nah, not really.”

“Well, you’ll need to stay here until you can stand on your own. You’re catheterized for now, so you’ll need to be able to urinate on your own in order to get cleared for home rest. But I must insist, sir, that you rest. No strenuous activity or exercise for at least six weeks.”

“I’ll get fat,” Shinohara offered weakly, but the doctor wasn’t amused. 

“Bedrest,” he said sternly, “Then light activity. And you need to drink lots of fluids and eat healthfully. Your body must heal before you return to work.”

“Understood,” Shinohara replied. Iwao shot him a significant look. 

“I’ll make sure he doesn’t push it too hard, doc,” he said sternly. 

“Good,” the doctor nodded. “Now, please let the nurse know if you’re experiencing any undue discomfort. I’ll be visiting you daily to update your condition.”

With that, the doctor left. Shinohara sighed loudly. 

“Well, I guess I’ll be watching a lot of TV…” he muttered. “Can I get some water, Iwacchi?”

“Of course,” Iwao said, but he groaned softly as he rose. 

“That Arata sure did a number on us, didn’t he?”

“I’m not sure who was working harder to kill us,” Iwao replied, “The Owl or the Arata.”

Shinohara would have chuckled, but he knew it would hurt too much, so he just hummed his agreement. 

“Then again…that old Owl…he didn’t seem too intent on killing us. What was it he said?”

“There is no good reason to kill someone.”

“Seems like the wrong guy to make that kind of revelation.”

“Yeah.” 

Shinohara sipped at the water, Iwao holding the straw to his lips. It was good to have a friend like Iwao. Shinohara wasn’t sure how he would have gotten through this without him. 

“You make a report on that?”

“Sort of,” Iwao answered. “I’ll give my full report later. Anyway, you heard the doc. Just…rest, okay?”

“Yeah,” Shinohara said. He did feel exhausted, and he knew sleep was the best medicine. 

“Just…one more thing. Did Juuzou come by?”

“Nah,” Iwao shook his head. “But…I’ll wake you up if he comes around.”

“Appreciate it…” Shinohara muttered. “Night, Iwacchi.”

“Night.”

***

Days bled one into the other, passing in a haze of morphine, hospital food, sips of water, and consultations with the doctor. Iwao was discharged, but came to visit often enough, and even downloaded some audiobooks to Shinohara’s phone so that he wouldn’t be as bored. More than anything, he slept, but when he wasn’t asleep, he was wondering about Juuzou. He tried texting Juuzou once or twice, but he knew that Juuzou barely touched his phone, and when he did, it was only to play video games. True to form, his texts were never answered. 

Being in the hospital and spending so much time alone meant that he had time to think…more time than usual, more time than he’d had since the last time he was in the hospital. But this time, he had a great deal more to think about. He thought about the night before the raid, the way that Juuzou’s pale form had looked spread out on the bed, the way he squirmed under Shinohara’s tongue and teeth and lips and hands, the way his eyes had gone huge and then squeezed shut, the taste of his skin and his sweat…

Shinohara wondered if that was all this was, if Juuzou was simply experimenting and had chosen him as a safe vehicle for that exploration. Or…or if Juuzou felt something beyond that. Like he did. Because try as he might, Shinohara couldn’t shake the feeling that Juuzou was incredible, that he was like no one else that he’d ever been with. And though he wasn’t sure what to call his feelings, he knew that he had a deep affection for Juuzou. A deep affection that seemed to grow by the day, even from the confines of this room. 

Yet, Juuzou never called him, never texted him, never dropped by. He’d been in the hospital for nearly a week, now, and had Iwao not told him that Juuzou was fine, he might have thought his partner to be dead, killed in the raid, or more severely injured than Shinohara himself was. Even still, he couldn’t be angry with him. He couldn’t stop thinking about him, either. He found himself passing hours just replaying every time that they’d touched, all the things they had done together in just a few short months, even the things that had been difficult. He remembered that first day, walking the streets of Tokyo, explaining to Juuzou carefully that he had to learn to talk to people, to interact with them. 

It had been a wild ride. But the more he considered it, the more he realized that, more than anything, these past few months had invigorated him. He felt young again, felt the rush of falling for someone, of wanting to explore every inch of them, body and mind. At the same time, being a teacher, watching a pupil improve and excel…that was a rush of it’s own. Even if this was all that Juuzou wanted to be to him, Shinohara decided that was alright. He would take Juuzou wherever he was at. He would be okay with Juuzou’s absence. He would make himself okay with all of it. 

On the seventh day, he was able to stand. The nurses helped him, two slender women, one at each arm, trying to help him manage to push his bulk out of bed. It would have been comical if it wasn’t so painful. By the tenth day, he could stand on his own, though slowly. He could even pee on his own, which he deeply appreciated. When the fifteenth day rolled around, he was finally able to be discharged. He asked the CCG to send a car around for him, but Iwao cancelled the order and came himself. 

“You’re too good to me,” he said to Iwao, finally able to crack a crooked smile. 

“Yeah yeah. You owe me a beer though.”

Shinohara groaned. “Christ, a beer sounds good,” he sighed. 

“Just get a little stronger, and I’ll take you.”

“I’ll be working on it,” Shinohara said, easing himself down into the car. 

“I know,” Iwao replied, then he shut the door so that Shinohara wouldn’t have to reach for it. 

When he got home, Juuzou wasn’t there. Shinohara assumed that he must have been at the bureau, and hoped that Amon wasn’t too taxed by his presence. It dawned on him that he didn’t know—couldn’t know, really—who Juuzou was shadowing right now, but whoever it was, he hoped that Juuzou was behaving himself. Exhausted and shaky, he made his way to the bedroom, changed out of his dirty clothes and into loose pajama pants, letting his bandaged torso breathe. With a tremendous amount of grunting and groaning, he lowered himself into his bed and closed his eyes. 

***

He wasn’t sure how much time had passed when he opened his eyes again. He knew only that the room was dark, that the sun was down, and that Juuzou’s great eyes were blinking owlishly at him. 

“You’re back!” Juuzou called out with a grin. “You look so bad!”

Shinohara chuckled and winced. “Yeah well, I look better than I did.”

“Huh,” Juuzou stared at him. “You were gone for awhile.”

“Yeah, I was pretty banged up.”

“Is it true that your quinque started to eat you?”

“Yup.”

“Woah.”

They stared at each other for a minute before Shinohara’s hand found its way into the soft waves of Juuzou’s hair. Juuzou squirmed and brought his own hand up to grasp at Shinohara’s wrist, manipulating it so that Shinohara’s hand was pressed to his cheek. They stayed like that for a moment, Shinohara weighing how much it would hurt to lean forward, to bring their lips together, but Juuzou started wiggling and the moment broke. 

“Mr. Shinohara, I have a lot to tell you!”

Shinohara rolled on his back with a groan and sighed. “I bet you do. I heard some interesting news about you.”

“Yeah? Did they tell you about Jason?”

“Iwacchi told me you killed him and brought him in for a quinque…”

“Yup!”

“How did you manage it?”

“Well, I heard some strange sounds so I followed them out to a building. Then when I got there, Jason was laying on the floor! I guess some other guy beat him up pretty bad, but he still had his kakubah-…”

“Kakuhou…”

“Yeah that, and he tried to kill me but I sliced it up with my scorpion and put a lot of holes in him. Then he died! Another guy tried to get him but he was already dead so that guy left. And now Amon said I can get a powerful quinque to use when I get promoted!”

“That’s quite a tale…” Shinohara replied, turning his head slowly to smile at Juuzou again. “Guess we’re gonna have to make sure that you pass the tests, huh?”

“Yep! Amon says you’ll help me.”

“Of course I will,” Shinohara said. “Even busted up like this, I can still help you study. If I give you a list of books from the library, will you be able to get them?”

“I guess. But I don’t know how to study.”

“I’ll help you.”

“Okay!”

“Juuzou,” Shinohara said carefully.

“What?”

“I missed you while I was gone.”

“Why?” 

Shinohara felt a sinking feeling in his gut. So he’d been right, then, about Juuzou’s feelings. He was just another transient person in Juuzou’s life, despite what they had done, despite the affectionate touches and words. It wasn’t fair of him to expect someone who has been so profoundly wounded to be able to bond to him. It was different for him…he’d been hurt, sure, but he’d never endured even a fraction of what Juuzou had. Still, there was a small, irrational part of him that wanted Juuzou to feel something for him. _Something_. After all, Juuzou had taken over his thoughts, his affections, his life, really, ever since he’d entered it. Just a fraction of that in return would have been nice…

But Juuzou was Juuzou, he reminded himself. It was up to him to accept Juuzou as he was, or to step back from the relationship. Stepping back was the last thing he wanted to do right now, so that left one option. If he chose to attach himself to Juuzou, he would have to accept the fact that the attachment was one sided, and that it might always be so. 

“Because you make me feel good, and I like you,” Shinohara answered simply. 

“Huh,” Juuzou tried to process that, but just shrugged and jumped up off the bed. 

“I’m gonna order noodles. Do you want some?”

“Sure.”

“I found your credit card so I’ve been ordering food while you were gone.”

Shinohara groaned again. 

“Juuzou, don’t you know that you can use your own money for things like that?”

“Umm….I’d rather use yours.”

Shinohara sighed. “That’s fine…just…order the noodles, and I’ll try to get to the couch.”

“Okay, and then you can tell me all about the Owl! I wish I was there! I bet it was awesome!”

“I’m glad you weren’t there,” Shinohara muttered to Juuzou’s disappearing form as he ran around the corner. 

“Huh?” Juuzou called from the living room. 

“Forget it!” Shinohara called back, pulling himself into a sitting position. 

_You chose this_ , he thought to himself. _For better or worse, you chose this._

***

Though Shinohara was out of the field for a bit, he still felt that he could spend time researching the case. In his opinion, there wasn’t much to be found in the field anyway—his best bet was searching through news reports and CCG reports, and he could do that from home, for the most part. He set up a makeshift office in the living room, using the couch as his seat and the coffee table as a desk. Iwao was kind enough to bring over a printer, and often acted as courier for important documents that Shinohara didn’t quite trust Juuzou with. He was certain that the Binge Eater was out of the equation, but there was something strange going on with this new ghoul organization. 

Still, his job was to investigate the Binge Eater and to teach Juuzou, and even in his current sorry state, he was determined to do both. Days passed and he worked tirelessly, compiling every possible news source, online and in print, regarding ghoul related activity, murders, and accidents in all of Tokyo. He couldn’t confine his search to particular wards or areas, since the Binge Eater was known for being mobile and going where it liked. After a week of searching, he had already compiled more information than he could go through alone in a year. It was clear that someone else would need to be involved….probably a lot of someones. So he sent along emails trying to cobble together a team to help with the workload. 

In the meantime, Juuzou went off to work faithfully every day, though he was often home by noon, spreading his books around him and reading through them voraciously. When he ran across a word he didn’t know, he would ask Shinohara, but otherwise he was remarkably disciplined. His future quinque was a tremendous motivational factor, and Shinohara filed that information away for future use. 

After a few long, slow weeks, Juuzou came home with a quinque design book, offering a wide range of shapes for his future quinque. He sat next to Shinohara on the couch and they looked through it together, but Juuzou didn’t seem very excited about any of the designs at all. 

“These are boring,” he announced finally, a surly note in his voice. 

“Boring?” Shinohara asked, staring at an image of a two-headed axe. “You think so?”

“Yeah,” Juuzou nodded. “Everybody has these dumb quinques. I want a cool one. One that looks like it belongs only to me.”

“Well, you certainly have your own….unique sense of style,” Shinohara nodded. “So what do you have in mind?”

“I…well….you know, something like…uhhhhh….”

Shinohara laughed. It didn’t hurt as much now. “Okay, why don’t you look for what you want, and then draw it? You can try to get a custom one…but there’s no promises, okay? They might not be able to do it.”

“How come?”

“Well, quinque making is just as much a science as it is an art. If the shape doesn’t work with the mechanisms of the quinque, it may not be possible to use it.”

Juuzou huffed.

“Well, give it a shot. Maybe they can use your design.”

“Okay.”

“And Juuzou?”

“What?”

“If you’re going to be promoted, you’re going to need to learn some manners too, you know.” 

“Gross.”

“Even still. You have to be able to conduct yourself like an investigator so that people will take you seriously.”

Juuzou thought about that for a moment, then closed his quinque design book and looked up at Shinohara. “I guess if it helps with getting a promotion, I can do that too.”

“Good boy,” Shinohara said, not really thinking about his wording until a grin spread over Juuzou’s lips. 

“Mr. Shinohara, are you ever going to come back to work? It’s boring without you and no one else buys me candy.”

“Yeah, I should be back at my desk next week. Then you can study at the library in headquarters.”

“That still sounds boring.”

“What if I bring you candy?”

“Then that will be a _little_ better I guess.”

“Good. And will you start trying to learn good manners?”

“Do I get extra candy?”

“You get a promotion and a quinque, isn’t that enough?”

“Ummmm…..not if you’ll give me extra candy.”

Shinohara sighed. “We’ll see.”

Juuzou smiled at him and wiggled around on the couch. “Okay! I’m gonna draw my quinque now!”

“Go for it,” Shinohara waved his hand noncommittally and returned to combing through news reports from the previous August about the Binge Eater’s victims. He and Juuzou hadn’t done anything intimate since he’d gotten home. Juuzou still slept in bed with him, but he was waiting on the doctor to clear him for “strenuous activity.” Juuzou had complained about it a few times, but Shinohara tried to keep his complaints to himself. It could be worse, he reasoned. It could have turned out so much worse. 

Still, it wasn’t as though he didn’t feel the absence of it. It wasn’t as if he didn’t crave the contact, the rush, the feeling of it. If only this broken down old body would cooperate. 

“What are you thinking about?” Juuzou asked. His tone was innocent, but there was a knowing look in his eyes. “You’re looking at me _that_ way again.”

“I was…” Juuzou’s comment had caught him off guard. “Just thinking about you.”

“Yeah?” Juuzou smiled. “You didn’t look at me like that for awhile. I thought you didn’t wanna do stuff with me anymore.”

“No,” Shinohara said, perhaps too quickly. “I just can’t. Doctor’s orders.”

“That’s good.” Juuzou nodded, his gaze returning to the paper before him as he sketched. “‘Cause I tried touching myself like you do, and it didn’t feel the same.”

“You tried that?” Shinohara asked, arching a brow. His papers lay forgotten on the couch.

“Yeah, and I watched some movies on the internet and learned a lot of stuff.”

Shinohara felt his cheeks grow warm. “See anything you liked?”

“Yeah. Did you know that you can fuck me in the ass? It looks like it feels good but I can’t figure out how to make it work.”

Shinohara tried to gather his words, his thoughts, but his tongue felt thick. Juuzou’s candid bravado never ceased to floor him.

“Ah…um…well…I…”

“Have you done it before?”

“I…yeah, uh, I have. To other people.”

“Have you ever had it done to you?”

“Ah…not really…a few…fingers but it wasn’t my thing, I guess.”

“It didn’t feel good?”

“Different people have different feelings.” Shinohara gathered his wits. “Some people just like to be sexual with their hands and mouths. Other people like…that. So it just depends.”

“I don’t know if I like it.”

“Do you want to find out?”

“Yeah.” 

“Alright,” Shinohara nodded, swallowing thickly. “Uh…when I’m feeling better. I’ll show you how…how it’s done.”

“Are you going to lick me there? It seems dirty.” Juuzou wrinkled his nose.

“Well, you have to clean it first,” Shinohara said as seriously as he could manage. “But sure I will, if you want.”

Juuzou looked back up at him appraisingly, as if trying to decide if he was the right man for the job. “Okay. Maybe.”

“Uh,” Shinohara wasn’t quite sure where to go from there. Analingus was quite a topic to follow up. “Anything else?” He was almost afraid to ask…then again, it was the most excitement he’d had since the night before the raid. His trepidation was outdone by his curiosity.

“Well, I saw a movie where these boys were tied up and electrocuted, that seemed fun too.”

Shinohara rubbed his hand over his mouth. “Wow, well, one thing at a time, I guess.”

Juuzou shrugged. 

***

“It’s good to see you up and around,” Iwao boomed, striding over to Shinohara. He was in much better shape than Shinohara was, truth be told, but it wasn’t his Arata that had malfunctioned, either. Shinohara was glad to see him striding around the CCG—it made things feel like they were going back to normal. 

“It’s good to be here,” Shinohara nodded with a smile. It was true, though getting there hadn’t been easy. Shinohara had set out to take his usual route on the train, but ended up calling a car just a few blocks from home. Despite his personal desire to function normally again, it seemed that he still needed time to rest and heal. He hated it, truth be told, but at least he’d been able to come to this meeting. It was mandatory, though he had a good enough excuse to miss it. Still, when the Director called a meeting of the Special Class and higher-ups, it was best not to wait for the recap. There would be confidential details of great importance revealed today, and Shinohara didn’t want to miss any of it. 

“How are you feeling?” Iwao asked, slowing his stride to match Shinohara’s as they made their way to the meeting room. 

“Better. Still pretty sore. Doc says I can start slowly getting back to life, now. Says I shouldn’t sit on my ass too long.”

“Well, you’ve never been one for sitting on your ass anyway, have you?”

“I guess not. Maybe I should do more of it though.”

Iwao laughed. “Maybe we all should.”

They talked about small things, each of them knowing better than to talk about the meeting or what it would entail. When they arrived, there were already several Special Class Investigators at the table, as well as Marude, but no Washuus were yet in sight. Shinohara sat down gingerly, sucking in a breath as his still-healing ribs twinged with pain. 

“Yo, Shinohara,” Marude smirked at him. “Glad to see you emerge from your hole.”

Shinohara smirked back. “Yeah, Maru. Ever get that bike fixed?”

A dark look passed over Marude’s face. “It was totaled.”

“Ah, sorry to hear it. Well, I’m sure you can afford a new one with the bonus you’ll be getting.”

Marude opened his mouth, closed it, and then began to remark loudly about how the meeting was supposed to have started already. Shinohara shot a look at Iwao, who grinned back at him. It wasn’t the first time they’d picked on Maru, but since he never stopped picking on everyone else, the temptation was irresistible. 

A few minutes of conversation later, the meeting room door opened, and the bureau director walked in. The conversation evaporated as each of the investigators stood and bowed. Director Washuu nodded and made his way to his seat. 

“I’ve called you here today to discuss the results of the raid, the ghoul organization known as Aogiri Tree, and the current state of the CCG. Please, sit.” 

Each of the investigators obeyed. The time for small talk was over. 

“The situation that we find ourselves in currently is unlike anything that the CCG has faced before,” Director Washuu steepled his fingers, elbows resting on the conference table. “As Investigators Marude, Shinohara, Iwao, and many others risked their lives in the raid, certain ghouls that we believe to be higher-ups in the Aogiri Tree organization were carrying out an attack on Cochlea.”

Shinohara frowned. Why had he not heard of this? Maybe Iwao had forgotten to mention it. No one else at the table seemed surprised, anyway. 

“They were able to make it to the third level, and they released a number of SS rank ghouls form their cells. It is due to the courageous sacrifices of the guards there that they were stopped. Measures are being taken to reinforce security at Cochlea. Clearly, we can not risk this happening again.”

Hums of agreement passed around the table. The Director continued. 

“However, the CCG has never been faced with an organized ghoul group whose objective appears to be the elimination of the human race, or at the very least, of the CCG. If we’re not careful, they will overwhelm us. The intel that we’ve gathered suggests that this is only the first time that we will clash with the Aogiri Tree. Most likely, it is not the last. We need to accelerate production of quinques, the training of young investigators, and the anti-ghoul technology that the CCG is currently creating, or we wont be prepared for the next time.” 

“The anxiety at the CCG is high right now, as I am sure each of you has experienced. Please continue to work on your assignments, but be aware of the larger objectives that the CCG is undertaking at this time. Keep your eyes open, and look for any suspicious activity that may be related to the Aogiri Tree. Additionally, Iwao and Shinohara have expressed some concern about the One-Eyed Owl. There is some doubt in their minds that this One-Eyed Owl is the same one that Arima faced ten years ago. If that is the case, then we may have two Owls to contend with. I do not suspect that you need to be told how much of a problem that would be. Iwao will continue investigating this matter.”

Iwao nodded. 

The meeting continued, with the Director going through each of the Investigator’s current assignments and subordinates. When he arrived at Shinohara, he asked, “Will your subordinate be seeking promotion?”

“Yes,” Shinohara nodded. “He was not an academy graduate, so we are currently working on his knowledge base for the exam.”

“And do you recommend him?”

“Despite his behavior, Juuzou is a capable investigator who took down Jason of the 13th Ward. I think that his true abilities need to be honed, but that he will be an excellent investigator.”

“Arima said as much as well,” Washuu looked at Shinohara for a moment, then nodded. “If he passes the test, I will take your recommendation into consideration.”

“I’m grateful,” Shinohara smiled back.

“One more thing,” The bureau director said. “It seems that Amon Koutarou will be promoted at the next ceremony in four months time. He will be given a subordinate. Akira Mado appears to be the most appropriate match.”

Shinohara frowned. “Is there no one else? There could be a conflict of interest between them due to Amon’s involvement in her father’s death.”

Director Washuu nodded. “It’s been considered. However, Akira Mado needs to be paired up, and Amon is a good match in terms of skill. I do not think that we will change our stance on this.”

“Well,” Shinohara shrugged. “Then I will do my best to guide Amon and Akira both.”

“I expect nothing less.”

The meeting adjourned, and Shinohara said his goodbyes before climbing back into the CCG car. Amon and Akira. He could only hope that this partnership was less ill-fated than he’d imagined.


	9. Osteoclasts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Truth be told, even he still had trouble wrapping his mind around the story of Juuzou and Jason. As he understood it, Jason had already been mostly dead by the time Juuzou found him. But he still had his kagune, and used it…the fear of pretty much that exact scenario had plagued Shinohara throughout the raid, and yet it happened. And Juuzou survived. To Shinohara, it seemed as though Juuzou was far more fearsome than anyone was giving him credit for. But, he had to admit, he’d seen many sides of Juuzou that no one else had yet been privy to—his nightmares, his insecurities, his…episodes? Whatever it was when Juuzou climbed to high places with bloodshot eyes and feverish murmurs. Juuzou had begun his career as a pariah, but as time passed, Shinohara became more and more sure that he would end it as a legend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! Sorry for the long wait. There have been some things going on, and my time and creativity was a bit low there for awhile. Here's a long chapter, though! 
> 
> I really appreciate everyone who has taken the time to comment on these chapters, and who have sent messages to me. Comments are so nice to receive, so thank you <3
> 
> As always, you can find me on tumblr at [tinyghoulproblem](http://tinyghoulproblem.tumblr.com/). I'm hoping to get another chapter in before school starts! 
> 
> Please enjoy!

“Juuzou?” Shinohara called out, winding his way through the CCG’s library. “You here?”

“Barely…” a small voice answered back. Shinohara tried to follow the sound of it. 

He found Juuzou buried behind a stack of books, His head in his hands, eyes glassy. 

“This is _so much_ ," Juuzou whined, flopping back in his chair. “I’m trying to remember it but it’s a _lot_.”

“Yeah, it is,” Shinohara nodded. “You know, most investigators take years to learn this stuff.”

“That sounds _even worse_ ” Juuzou groaned. 

“Well, I guess it depends on who you are.”

Juuzou chewed on the end of his pen, staring down at his messy notes. 

“Are you able to understand everything you’re reading?”

“Pretty much. I dunno all the kanji sometimes, but the lady at the front gave me a dictionary.” 

“That’s great,” Shinohara smiled. “You must be learning a lot.” 

“I guess. I dunno if I can remember it all though.”

“Well…sometimes there are tricks for that kind of thing.”

“What kind of tricks?”

“Memory tricks. You can use easy tricks to remember lists…for example, the first four letters of the types of kagune….ukaku, koukaku, rinkaku, bikaku, so u, k, r, b…how about, ‘under kings run bunnies.’”

“What does it mean?”

“It’s just a silly phrase, but it’s easy to remember. Then when you have to answer the question, you’ll remember them and in the right order. Then you just have to remember what they do.”

“That does make is easier!” Juuzou smiled. “Thanks!”

“No problem. I have a bad memory, you know. So it’s easier for me too, this way. Eventually, you don’t need that stuff anymore, but for now, I think it will help.”

“Yeah,” Juuzou nodded. “I think so. But Mr. Shinohara, did you bring me something?

Shinohara had nearly forgotten the bag he was carrying, but Juuzou was certainly eyeballing it with interest. Shinohara laughed. 

“As a matter of fact I did. Want some doughnuts?”

“Yeah!” Juuzou called out, grinning. “Dough-nuts, dough-nuts!”

“Alright, but while you eat why don’t you tell me everything you’ve learned today. That’s another way to help it all…stick.”

“Fine, fine,” Juuzou agreed. “But I get at least three doughnuts.”

“It’s a deal.” 

Juuzou ate his doughnuts with wide eyes, speaking around the mouthfuls to tell Shinohara of the different types of kagunes, the variations, chimeras and kakujas, the different quinques, what was weak against what, what was strong against what, and rattled off the main laws governing quinque usage and dispensation to investigators. Shinohara ruffled his hair and grinned. 

“You’ve learned a lot today!”

“Yeah!” Juuzou was excited now, seeming almost surprised at his own ability to recite everything from memory. “It’s kind of like a puzzle, you know?”

“It is….” Shinohara agreed. “You just have to piece it all together.”

“Right.” Juuzou’s face was covered with crumbs. Shinohara dug through the bag he had and pulled out a napkin. 

“Here you go. You want me to help you study?”

“Hmmm…I’ll do it by myself for now. Can I tell you what I learn when I come home tonight though?”

“Of course,” Shinohara smiled. 

“Okay!”

Shinohara patted Juuzou’s back and stood slowly, stretching his form out carefully. 

“Why do you still move so slow?” Juuzou asked, head tilted to the side.

“Well,” Shinohara shrugged. “I guess I’m old and I heal slowly.”

“But it’s been _months_.”

“Well,” Shinohara sighed, “I’ll keep doing my best, okay?”

“Alright,” Juuzou agreed, his gaze returning to his books. “See you tonight.”

***

Shinohara made his way through the CCG, though he couldn’t seem to walk without being waylaid by someone or another. Everyone was curious about his condition, about his subordinate, about Jason of the 13th Ward and Juuzou’s now-legendary story of bagging him. 

_Is it true that he defeated him with just one Scorpion?_

_Is it true that he was already dead when he was found?_

_Is it true that he sliced apart his kagune?_

_Is it true? Is it true?_

Shinohara couldn’t begrudge their curiosity…it was an incredible story, and like all stories, the details had become distorted as it travelled through the CCG grapevine. Yes, he assured them, Juuzou had defeated Jason. Yes, he had done it with only a Scorpion. Yes, he had sliced apart his kagune. The excretions at the site had been analyzed, and Juuzou’s story entirely confirmed. Still, it was hard to believe that such a small, inexperienced investigator had managed to take down a 223 pound, S-ranked ghoul on his own. Shinohara understood that, but the questions had started to become tedious, exhausting. He made his way down to the quinque training grounds, trying to look busy and important to avoid further inquiry. 

Truth be told, even he still had trouble wrapping his mind around the story of Juuzou and Jason. As he understood it, Jason had already been mostly dead by the time Juuzou found him. But he still had his kagune, and used it…the fear of pretty much that exact scenario had plagued Shinohara throughout the raid, and yet it happened. And Juuzou survived. To Shinohara, it seemed as though Juuzou was far more fearsome than anyone was giving him credit for. But, he had to admit, he’d seen many sides of Juuzou that no one else had yet been privy to—his nightmares, his insecurities, his…episodes? Whatever it was when Juuzou climbed to high places with bloodshot eyes and feverish murmurs. Juuzou had begun his career as a pariah, but as time passed, Shinohara became more and more sure that he would end it as a legend. It made him consider Arima, wonder where the legend of Arima ended, and the man beneath it began. 

He pushed the thoughts from his mind as he finally arrived at his destination, slipped through the door as quietly as he could, and moved to stand on the observation deck behind a thick wall of plexiglass. She was there, as he’d known that she would be. Impossibly, she practiced with a quinque in her normal business attire, a slim-fitting suit, low heels, a button-up shirt. Still, she was able to move with absolute efficiency, blond hair flashing beneath the lights of the training room as she struck target after target with impossible precision. Shinohara had known her father, had known of her mother, and he could see them both in her. They were there with her in her deft hands, in her precise movements, in the ruthless way she made each hit count with the training dummies. 

“Mr. Shinohara,” she said cooly, not missing a beat. “Have you come to evaluate me?”

“Hardly,” Shinohara snorted. “I’ve heard you’re something to see with that Amatsu. Thought I’d see for myself.”

“I wonder who’s been talking about me?” Akira smiled as she whipped the quinque around her. “I knew my ears were burning for a reason.”

“Well, I’ve heard only good things,” Shinohara shrugged. “You wanna grab a bite to eat?”

She finally stopped training and looked over at him with a smile. 

“With the indomitable Shinohara? I’d be honored.” 

Shinohara knew she was ribbing him, but it was all in good fun. He knew how to handle the various Mados…he was simply worried that Amon may not know about the sharp humor, the “mad jokes,” as he’d come to call them. 

“C’mon,” he nodded toward the door. “I’ll buy.”

“You’re too kind,” Akira took off her protective glasses and put them in the bin for cleaning. “I hope I’m not too sweaty to be seen in public.”

“You don’t seem to struggle with such mundane things,” Shinohara winked. “You look great. Lets go get some curry.”

“A man after my own heart,” Akira sighed, offering him a smile. 

Half an hour later they were seated, steaming plates of rice before them, each of them with their own bowl of curry. Akira delicately pushed her rice to the side, making space on her plate for her curry. Shinohara simply poured his over the rice without a thought.

“So have you heard?” Akira asked.

“Heard what?” Shinohara feigned ignorance. 

“Oh you know, don’t you? That’s why you brought me here today.”

“Hmm?” Shinohara shoveled curry and rice into his mouth, stared at Akira wide-eyed. She scoffed back at him. 

“You know it’s a waste of our time to play this game.”

“No time spent with Ms. Mado is wasted,” Shinohara claimed, a mischievous glint in his eye. 

“Oh god, you’re worse than Houji,” she laughed softly, nibbling at her naan. “C’mon…someone spilled the beans already. I wont tell you who my sources are, but I know I’m going to be on your team. 

“Is that what you heard?” Shinohara hummed softly. “Interesting.”

“I know that you’re partnered with the boy, the one who never bothered graduating. And I know Houji is partnered with Takizawa. Which means there’s only one other investigator for me to be partnered with. An investigator who has a dodgy history with Mados.”

Shinohara hummed again, noncommittal, and continued eating. He wasn’t planning to give anything away, and from what he could tell, Akira was working off of deductions and assumptions…she knew only that she was on his team, nothing else. 

Akira hummed back at him, and then they lapsed into silence, each eating with dogged determination. Eventually, plates empty and bellies full, they sat in silence, sipping tea. 

“You’re really not going to confirm it?” Akira asked. “Don’t you think I should have a little fair warning before I’m put under the care of the man who got my father killed?”

“Akira…” Shinohara raised a brow. “Things happen out there, you can’t…it’s not so simple as all that. He was waylaid by a ghoul.”

“Yes, and I’ve read his report. I know that he blames himself for my father’s death, and if he does, why shouldn’t I?”

“Look,” Shinohara rubbed his hand over his face and sighed. “Amon blames himself, but that doesn’t mean he was responsible. You lost your father and nothing can change that, or make it better. None of us….none of us can know what you’re feeling, Akira, but Amon lost a mentor…and I lost an old, beloved friend. Without your father, neither of us would be where we are. We can’t know how you feel, but we are all grieving, and we all know what it means to lose someone. And…and I think it’s natural for Amon to blame himself when he was so close by. But it wasn’t his fault.”

He looked up, looked into her eyes, trying to read her. There was a flicker here and there, a flash in her eyes, a tightening around her mouth, and then it was over. Cool indifference slipped over her features once more and she nodded. 

“Alright, Mr. Shinohara. I only hope that I can someday meet the ghoul that killed my father…and teach her what it means to hurt a Mado.”

Shinohara patted her back softly. He wasn’t sure what to say, so he simply nodded, allowed Akira’s words to hang in the air between them. There was a part of him that hoped the same, and a part of him that knew this cycle, knew it well. It plagued them all, yet it never changed. With a sigh, he nodded toward the door. 

“Ready to go?”

“Yeah,” Akira nodded. “Wanna spar when we get back?”

“Nah,” Shinohara laughed softly. “I’d rather hold on to my curry.”

“I forget sometimes that you’re an old man,” Akira winked. 

“I’m glad someone forgets…” 

They laughed together as they pushed through the doors. 

***

The next few weeks passed in a blur. Shinohara threw himself into physical therapy while Juuzou threw himself into studying. At night, Juuzou would lay draped over Shinohara’s lap on the couch, reciting facts, figures, procedures, rules, and protocols while Shinohara stroked his hair, let his fingers play over the soft skin of his stomach. He struggled on some of the particularly intricate details, but overall, he was doing an incredible job. At some point, Shinohara realized that he was sure…absolutely sure, in fact, that Juuzou would pass his exams. The thought of it made his chest swell with pride, but he tried not to be so outwardly sure; he couldn’t have Juuzou getting cocky, now. 

But watching Juuzou study was far different that Shinohara might have originally imagined. When Juuzou put his mind to something, it was shockingly powerful. He was intelligent—strikingly so—with a sharp memory and good reasoning skills. Shinohara thought about how childish Juuzou had always seemed, about his questions, his fundamental lack of understanding, and he was more sure than ever that Juuzou had a great deal of cognitive power that had suffered from the absolute neglect of those around him. He’d always had the latent ability to learn this information, but no one had ever bothered to teach him.

The night before the promotion exam, Juuzou laid across the couch, head rested on Shinohara’s thigh, and wearily recited the laws and bylaws of the CCG’s Investigator Code of Conduct. Shinohara ran his fingers through Juuzou’s hair as he did so often, marveling at how large and rough they looked in the midst of all those soft, white strands. When Juuzou finished, he looked up at Shinohara with an expectant gaze. Shinohara smiled down at him and nodded. 

“You’re going to do fine,” he assured Juuzou. “But you need to get a good night’s sleep. The test starts at 9 am sharp, and you’re going to need to take the train. Want me to come with you?”

“It’s in the 1st Ward headquarters, right?”

“Yep.”

“Maybe. If you wanna buy me doughnuts.” 

“Afterwards. You need to eat a healthy breakfast before the test to keep your energy up.”

“Doughnuts give me _lots_ of energy.”

“Yeah, but then you get sleepy.”

“Not if I eat another doughnut.”

“Yes, but you can’t have doughnuts in the testing room.”

“Can I have candy?”

“No, just water in a clear bottle.”

“What?” Juuzou sat up, frowning. “Really?”

“Yeah, really. It’s a distraction to everyone else if someone has candy.”

Juuzou frowned. “But the test is four hours long!”

“You get a break in the middle,” Shinohara shrugged. “You can have a snack then.” 

Juuzou groaned and flopped down. “What if I can’t remember anything without candy?”

“I think you’re going to do just fine.” 

Juuzou huffed. 

“You’re gonna be there then? While I take the test?”

“Sure,” Shinohara nodded. “I can do my physical therapy in the gym and work in my office. Will that make you feel better?”

Juuzou nodded. 

“Well then, it’s a deal.”

They woke up early the next morning, and Shinohara made them both omelettes. After breakfast, they were off, riding the underground to the 1st ward headquarters as they had so many times before. It was strangely nostalgic, and as they rode, Shinohara reached over and patted Juuzou on the head. 

“You’re going to do a great job,” he assured Juuzou with a smile. 

“Yeah, okay,” Juuzou said half-heartedly. Shinohara had never seen him nervous before, not that he could remember. It was strange, all of his usual bravado muted in the face of this new and unknown challenge. Juuzou had faced down many ghouls, had even managed to take Jason himself, yet it was this test which daunted him. Shinohara understood, however. He’d gotten decent marks in the academy, but he’d always been more skilled in the practical aspects of his job. He had a good intuition, a curious mind, and a strong body, but when it came to rote memorization…well, he’d never been the best. 

“You know, I think you know this material better than i did when I graduated from the academy. And I passed my test just fine.”

“You really think that?” Juuzou asked, wide-eyed.

“Yep. You’ve been reciting information to me every night, haven’t you?”

Juuzou hummed.

“Well, I think you know everything on that test now. You have to achieve an 80% or higher to pass the exam, and I think you’re going to get an even better score than that.”

Though he still looked dubious, Juuzou smiled and nodded. 

“Okay,” he said, leaning over to rest his head on Shinohara’s arm. “But you better be there when I go on my break. With candy.”

“Alright,” Shinohara nodded. 

At headquarters, Shinohara helped Juuzou find the testing room and sign in with the proctor. Finally, he crouched down and looked Juuzou in the eyes. 

“You’re gonna do great,” he said quietly. “Just take a deep breath and take your time filling in your answers, okay?

“Okay,” Juuzou nodded. Shinohara wanted to kiss his forehead, but they were in a room full of young investigators. He contented himself with squeezing Juuzou’s shoulder instead. 

“See you in two hours, okay?”

“Okay.” 

***

“Mr. Shinohara!” Juuzou called out, shaking Shinohara’s shoulders until his ribs started to twinge. “It’s today! It’s today!”

“Oof, Juuzou, Christ,” Shinohara groaned, reaching up to wrap a hand around Juuzou’s slender arm. “Gentle, please…”

“But _today is the day_ ,” Juuzou whined, though mercifully, he stopped shaking Shinohara’s shoulders. 

“I know, but it’s…” Shinohara rolled over in the bed. “Six o’clock in the morning…you think we need to be up this early?”

“Yes!” Juuzou exclaimed, standing up and jumping off of the bed. “Get up! Let’s go there right away!”

Shinohara rolled over with a moan and a sigh. he understood Juuzou’s enthusiasm, but he’d been having such a nice dream…a dream where his ribs no longer hurt, a dream where Juuzou was soft and pliant and wearing the sweetest little outfit…

He sighed again, louder this time, and pushed himself up out of the bed. 

An hour later, they were out the door and on the train, packed into the steel tubes with the rest of the morning commuters. Juuzou chewed his lips and bounced up and down nervously, the other passengers around him giving him furtive, questioning looks. Shinohara let a hand rest on Juuzou’s shoulder, gently squeezing it when Juuzou started to bounce too much and jostle the people around him. Finally, they arrived, and Juuzou tore off at top speeds toward the building. Shinohara quickened his pace as much as he could, his eyes fixed on Juuzou’s hair as it bobbed away from him. 

He finally caught up with him in the hall outside the testing center, where Juuzou was staring up at a piece of paper with wide eyes. 

“Well?” Shinohara asked, making his way over with long strides. Juuzou didn’t answer, but when he looked up, he could clearly see his partner’s name on the list, the fourth one down. 

“Look at that!” Shinohara laughed, wrapping an arm around Juuzou’s narrow shoulders. “You made it!”

“I really did?” Juuzou asked, incredulous.

“Yeah you did!”

“But…” Juuzou looked up at him with wide eyes, “Does this mean I get a promotion?”

“Well,” Shinohara paused. “You’ve passed the exam, taken down a high-ranking ghoul, and you’ve gotten a recommendation from your partner…so all that’s left is getting cleared by the Director.”

“And…” Juuzou’s eyes grew even wider. “Does that mean….I get my quinque?”

“If you get the promotion, then yes, you should get your quinque as soon as Dr. Chigyou finishes creating it.”

Juuzou let out a yell and jumped up, wrapping his arms around Shinohara in a hug. “I did it!” he said, still sounding like he could hardly believe it. “I really did it!”

Shinohara had been taken off-guard by the hug, but now he leaned down gingerly and returned it, laughing. “You did, Juuzou. Congratulations!” 

After a few seconds, Juuzou pulled away and grinned. “Now what?”

“Now,” Shinohara hummed, rubbing his hand over his mouth, though he couldn’t stifle his grin. “Now, let’s get pancakes to celebrate!”

“Yeah!” Juuzou jumped up onto a bench in the hall, then flipped off of it. “Let’s go!”

***

“You wanted to see me?” Shinohara stood in the doorway of director Washuu’s office, a smile on his face. 

“Yes, come in. Shut the door,” the chairman said, waving Shinohara inside. “Please, sit.” 

Shinohara sat obediently, crossing one leg over the other. “What can I do for you, sir?”

“Well, first of all, I just heard that you’ve been cleared for duty. Congratulations. We’ve missed you in the field.”

“Thank you,” Shinohara grinned. “It’s good to be back.” 

And it was. He hadn’t stopped smiling since the doctor informed him of his status, though going back to work wasn’t the only thing on his mind. 

“Fortuitous timing, with the promotion ceremony later this week.”

“Yes, I agree.”

“Which brings me to my next point,” the director smiled. “It’s been decided that your subordinate, Suzuya Juuzou, has earned his promotion to Rank 2 Investigator.”

Shinohara laughed softly. “That’s great to hear, director Washuu.”

“From what I understand, he did a remarkable job on both the written and oral parts of the exam. The examiners were quite impressed by him. All things considered, his progress beneath your tutelage really has been impressive. I hope this isn’t too harsh, but many investigators assumed that your partner would either get himself killed or kicked out by now. Instead, those who examined him said he has an aptitude comparable to Arima.” 

Shinohara felt a grin spread across his lips. It wasn’t news to him—he’d seen Juuzou’s aptitude since they’d been paired together, eight months ago. Now, however, Juuzou was truly blossoming…and others were noticing. It was the fact that others could see it as well that made Shinohara proud. 

“Well, thank you, director. I believe that Juuzou is a remarkably talented investigator, and that he will be a great asset to the CCG.”

“Indeed,” the director smiled. “I’ve even heard rumors that his behavior is improving.” 

“I am making an effort to teach him social skills in addition to his duties as an investigator.”

“It shows.”

Shinohara nodded to the director. 

“And…one other thing. Dr. Chigyou has informed me that he’s completed Juuzou’s quinque. It’s quite the weapon. I hope that he will use it wisely.”

“I’ll ensure that he does,” Shinohara replied. 

“Indeed,” the director said. “And where are you planning to take your investigation from here?”

“Well,” Shinohara uncrossed his legs, leaned forward. “I’ve been combing through the reports from all of the districts…however, I’m becoming more and more convinced that the Binge Eater is no longer active. Either it died, or it left Tokyo. It’s been months since it was active, however. As far as I can tell, the investigation is grounded.”

“Keep looking,” the director said with a nod. “Until you’re sure.”

“Yes sir,” Shinohara nodded. “Until I’m sure.”

***

Shinohara walked in the door, threw his keys in the dish, and called out, “I’m home!”

“In here!” Juuzou’s voice came from the living room, and Shinohara followed the sound of it to find Juuzou sprawled out on the couch, drawing on a pad of paper. Shinohara smiled down at the sight of him, all long pale limbs, wearing red shorts, a black tank top, his hair messy, pulled back and secured with a rubber band. Shinohara was staring, yes, but he didn’t realize that he’d gotten lost in it until Juuzou turned around and gave him a quizzical look. 

“What?”

“Oh, uh…I have good news!” Shinohara replied with a grin, throwing his jacket over the back of the couch as Juuzou moved aside to make room for him. 

“Yeah?” Juuzou’s eyes lit up and he bounced up and down. “Good for me, or for you?”

“Both!” Shinohara laughed, “Can you guess?”

“Um…” Juuzou’s face screwed up in concentration, then his eyes went wide. “I’m getting promoted?” 

“Yes!” Shinohara confirmed.

“Are you serious?” Juuzou yelled out excitedly, bouncing even more. 

“Totally serious, but there’s more!”

“More?” Juuzou asked, eyes wide as saucers. 

“Yep! Can you guess?”

“Ummm….ummmmm…..oh! Oh! Is it my quinque?”

“Yes!” Shinohara confirmed, laughing. 

Juuzou yelled and jumped up, tackling Shinohara into a hug before pulling away and running a circle off the room. 

“Quin-que! Quin-que! I’m getting my quinque!” he called out. He looked like he might actually burst from the excitement. 

“Have you seen it? Is it awesome? Does it look like my drawing?”

“I haven’t seen it yet, but I’m sure it’s great,” Shinohara smiled, “Dr. Chigyou is very skilled.” 

Juuzou collapsed on the couch, kicked his legs in the air, and sighed. 

“I can’t believe it. My own quinque! Can we get it now?” 

“Not quite yet,” Shinohara replied. “They’re putting the final touches on it. We can get it Friday…the day after your promotion.”

Juuzou groaned, but he was grinning nevertheless. “I can’t wait!” He said balling his hands into fists. “How can I sleep between now and then?”

“Oh, you’ll manage,” Shinohara said. “Anyway, it’ll go faster if you sleep.”

“That’s true I guess…” Juuzou nodded. “Oh, what’s the good news for you?”

“Doc cleared me to go back to work!” Shinohara grinned. “So I’m back to my old self again!”

Juuzou let out an exaggerated sigh of relief. “Good! Mr. Amon is _so boring_ , and he never even lets me eat candy at my desk.” 

“What a monster,” Shinohara laughed. 

“I _know_ ,” Juuzou replied, utterly serious. “But…ugh, does this mean I have to help you with reading all those boring reports?”

“I’m afraid so.”

“Gross.” 

“But I’ll let you have candy.” 

“Okay!” Juuzou perked up, grinned. “That’s much better!” 

Juuzou crawled up into Shinohara’s lap, wrapped his arms around Shinohara’s neck. “You were pretty boring when you were hurt,” he said with a frown. 

“Well,” Shinohara grimaced, “My apologies. There wasn’t much else to be done, I’m afraid.”

They hadn’t been entirely chaste, but their actions were so limited by Shinohara’s injuries that they hadn’t been able to explore much, either. He couldn’t risk being off the job longer than strictly necessary, and it was pretty shocking how restricting a few broken ribs could be. Even cuddling had been uncomfortable up until about two weeks before, and without being cleared for strenuous physical activity, Shinohara was afraid to do…much of anything. But they didn’t have to worry about that anymore, and Juuzou’s eyes were wicked. 

With a grin, Juuzou stood and twisted a piece of hair around one finger. “I’m gonna shower okay?” 

“You don’t want to eat first?” Shinohara asked, brow raised. 

“Already did,” Juuzou shrugged. Shinohara nearly piped up to tell him that candy couldn’t possibly count as dinner, but he’d already turned to walk down the hall. Shinohara’s guts felt like they were in knots, but still he made his way to the kitchen and managed to choke down some cup noodles. Being sexual with Juuzou was….well, different from anyone else he’d ever been with. It was difficult to ascertain whether or not Juuzou’s sexuality was an expression of his affection or his curiosity, and after some time, Shinohara had finally decided it was something of both. Though, were he entirely honest with himself, he would have to admit that it was probably more curiosity than anything else. If affection or attachment were emotions that Juuzou had the capability of feeling, they were muted, somehow. Even though he’d allowed himself some vulnerability around Shinohara, there was something almost one-sided about it. Shinohara wasn’t sure that it would ever be different. 

But, truth be told, he didn’t care to consider that right now. His thoughts were elsewhere. 

He heard the water turn off, and that was all the cue he needed to leave those messy thoughts behind. He’d promised Juuzou that once he was cleared by the doctor, they would try something new, and he’d often occupied himself daydreaming about what, precisely, that would be. Now, as he walked to the bedroom, he could feel his heart beating faster. It had definitely been too long. 

Juuzou sat on the bed, smoothing down his stitches and inspecting them for any bumps or imperfections. Shinohara smiled down at him, and Juuzou looked up at him mischievously. 

“Remember you promised?”

“I do.”

“So what’re you gonna do?”

“I’m gonna see how good I can make you feel.”

Juuzou squinted at him.

“How?”

“Remember what we talked about, after I came home?”

“Yeah.”

“That’s what I was thinking.”

Juuzou fidgeted around, but he was smiling.

“Is it okay?”

Juuzou put a finger to his lips like he was thinking, then nodded quickly. 

“If you don’t like it, all you have to do is say so, okay? I’ll stop.” 

Juuzou hummed and watched as Shinohara unbuttoned his shirt, threw it in the hamper, and undid his belt. With a smile, Juuzou hopped up off the bed and turned off the overhead light, opting for the lamp instead. Shinohara sat on the bed and took his shoes off, while Juuzou draped his arms over Shinohara’s neck from behind. 

“Hey,” Juuzou whispered in his ear. 

“Yes?” Shinohara whispered back.

“What if I can’t come?”

“Well, does it feel good when I touch you?”

“Yeah…”

“And you like it?”

“Yeah…”

“As long as you feel good, it’s fine.”

He could feel Juuzou nodding, his soft skin scratching on the stubble of Shinohara’s cheek. In one quick motion, Shinohara pulled Juuzou around so he was sitting in his lap, staring up at him with widened eyes. Shinohara brushed the dampened strands of hair from Juuzou’s face, then tilted his chin up and pulled him into a kiss. Juuzou’s hands grasped either side of Shinohara’s face, pulling him closer. His kisses were hungry, soft lips pressing to Shinohara’s with an intent that Shinohara couldn’t remember feeling before. Juuzou felt so small in Shinohara’s arms, yet he was anything but delicate. His smooth skin didn’t hide the sinewy cords of muscle beneath, and it was that dichotomy between sweetness and strength that made Shinohara’s heart beat faster, than made his cock start to go hard, still trapped behind the zipper of his slacks. 

A few kisses later and he was turning Juuzou around in his lap, pressing kisses to the back of his neck, nibbling his shoulders, pinching up one of his nipples while Juuzou moaned and bucked. They were both hungry after all of this time, after all of that patience; Shinohara tried to remind himself to move slowly, to warm Juuzou’s body up thoroughly. He had been wanting to try this for quite some time, to see if he could overwhelm Juuzou’s senses so much for so long that he could send him over the edge…and they had hours at their disposal. 

Juuzou was grinding down on him now, grasping at the fabric of Shinohara’s undershirt with shaking fingers. Shinohara wasn’t sure what mechanism stopped him from feeling pain, but he was just glad that it didn’t interfere with his sensations of pleasure. One of his hands made its way down to the tender skin of Juuzou’s pelvis, and he rubbed there as Juuzou frotted against him. With a sigh, he buried his face in Juuzou’s damp hair, breathing in the sweet smell of his shampoo while he reveled in the feeling of this, of having Juuzou pressed against him, grinding down on him, making soft little noises, trembling under his hands. 

It wasn’t long before he had Juuzou on the bed, face down and ass in the air. He was a beautiful sight, a sight Shinohara reminded himself not to get lost in as he leaned over him, pressed kisses down the bumps of his spine. Juuzou fisted a hand in the blankets, whining softly. Shinohara hushed him, ghosting his lips over the dimples at the base of Juuzou’s spine.

“Patience…” he murmured into Juuzou’s skin.

Juuzou wasn’t one for patience, but Shinohara felt a little bit of tension release from him, felt his muscles relax just a hair. 

“Good,” Shinohara growled, and Juuzou giggled softly. In that moment, with his guard down, Shinohara let his tongue drag down Juuzou’s ass, circling the sensitive skin of his hole. Juuzou yelped, then giggled harder. 

“Oh!” he gasped out, “That’s so weird!”

“Do you like it?” Shinohara asked, smiling in spite of himself.

“Um….do it again.”

Shinohara complied, this time giving him slower, more lingering attentions. Juuzou groaned and shook, and Shinohara continued on, dragging his tongue down to Juuzou’s perineum before licking his way back up. Juuzou hummed and gasped, moaned and twitched, but when Shinohara’s tongue slowed or pulled away, he would whine until Shinohara began again. Finally, when he was shaking and sweating, when he could no longer keep his hips up, when his words had been reduced to little mewls of pleasure, Shinohara reached over and slid a bottle of lube from the drawer in his bedside table.

“Why did you stop?” Juuzou slurred, panting. 

“I want to try something else, now,” Shinohara squeezed some lube into his hand, trying to warm it up so that it wouldn’t be uncomfortable for Juuzou. 

“Are you…gonna…put it inside me?” 

“Just a finger, for now,” Shinohara assured him, “I’ll go slow.”

Juuzou nodded, allowed his hips to be propped up on pillows. Shinohara leaned over him again, pressing kisses to his shoulder while he used his slicked-up finger to circle Juuzou’s hole. 

“C’mon,” Juuzou breathed, “Just do it. I wanna feel it…I wanna…ah!” 

Shinohara had pressed into him, just to the first knuckle, but he had big fingers and this was a new sensation. Juuzou moaned while Shinohara whispered to him to relax, to just let him in. Juuzou nodded, his body relaxing into Shinohara’s caresses and kisses until Shinohara could get his finger in further.

“Does it feel good?” He asked Juuzou quietly. 

“Yeah…I…it’s…it’s weird,” Juuzou gasped, “But I…I want more.”

“Let’s try this, first,” Shinohara said, slowly moving his finger back and forth, never quite withdrawing it, but pushing it in just a little further each time. Juuzou moaned quietly at first, but soon he was yelling out, demanding more. And Shinohara complied, slipping in a second finger, working Juuzou’s tight muscles until they opened up more easily to him. He couldn’t help but unzip his pants with his free hand—the pressure against his cock was getting to be too much. He was so hard he could barely think; what little cognitive ability he had left was focused entirely on Juuzou, on the way him muscles squeezed and slackened, at the noises he made, at the way his body moved with every thrust of Shinohara’s fingers. 

“More,” Juuzou gasped, “More!” 

Shinohara would have asked if he was sure—he still felt so tight around those two fingers—but Juuzou was insistent. There was no room for argument in his tone, and Shinohara hardly had the will to deny him what he begged for. So he slipped in another finger, Juuzou bucking up against him, squeezing him, thrusting back hungrily. 

“ _Fuck_ ,” Shinohara shuddered, closing his eyes, trying to center himself, trying to keep himself from coming right there in his pants like a teenager. Then an idea struck him—he turned Juuzou over carefully, his fingers pumping into Juuzou’s ass while he leaned down and sucked and licked at the sensitive, scarred skin of Juuzou’s groin. Juuzou’s back arched and he cried out, his body shaking so hard that Shinohara might have stopped if he hadn’t felt two hands clap down on the back of his head, pushing him down harder while Juuzou’s hips thrusted up into the sensation. 

Juuzou yelled out a string of curses before sucking in a deep breath, going rigid, fingers scrabbling at the back of Shinohara’s head. Shinohara kept pumping into him with his fingers, kept licking and sucking at him, the fingers of his free hand digging in to Juuzou’s hip bones. With a deep moan, Juuzou’s body slackened, and Shinohara began to move inside him more slowly. Juuzou’s hands fell to his sides and he let out a low moan, his breath coming in gasps, his body covered in sweat. 

“Woah,” he whispered softly. And then, a little louder, “ _Woah_.”

Shinohara laughed softly, looked up at him. 

“Was that…did I? You know?”

“Yeah,” Shinohara confirmed with a nod. “That’s exactly what that was.” 

“Huh,” Juuzou giggled and wiped the sweat from his forehead. “It’s good. It’s…it’s really good.”

“Better than candy?” Shinohara teased.

“Probably,” Juuzou replied, his tone deadly serious. 

Shinohara nodded. “I agree.”

Slowly, Shinohara slid his fingers out of Juuzou, who whimpered and sighed at the loss of them. Then, eyes blinking up at Shinohara lazily, he asked, “Hey, how come you’re still wearing clothes?”

Shinohara looked down at himself, his undershirt damp with sweat, pants unzipped, cock pressing against his trunks. 

“Never got around to taking them off,” he shrugged. “You want me to?”

“Mmm-hmm,” Juuzou confirmed, smiling. “And then lay down.” 

Shinohara raised a brow at the order, but nevertheless, he was stripped down and laying on the bed a moment later. Juuzou pawed around on the bed until he found the bottle of lube, pouring some into his hand and staring at it for a minute before reaching around and sliding his own fingers inside himself. 

“I’m still so…open…” he marveled, and Shinohara tried to suppress his smile. He didn’t want Juuzou to feel self-conscious, but it was strangely adorable, watching him discover himself like this. 

“Anyway, I’m going to ride you,” Juuzou declared, not an ounce of shame in his voice. “So I hope you’re ready.”

Shinohara had never quite had anyone tell him that so candidly, and he broke out into a laugh. 

“Oh, Juuzou…I hope I am too.” 

Juuzou poured more lube into his hand and then, with careful determination, he used his hand to rub it onto Shinohara’s cock. 

“Oh, fuck,” Shinohara gasped at the sudden sensation, his cock throbbing in Juuzou’s hands. When he was slicked up to Juuzou’s apparent satisfaction, Juuzou crawled over him and straddled his hips. 

“Okay,” Juuzou said, “You’re pretty big though.”

“Just take it slow, okay?” Shinohara encouraged him, his voice pitching unexpectedly lower. “Only do what feels good.”

Juuzou nodded, determined, then used one hand to guide Shinohara’s cock inside. Even after taking three fingers, he was still incredibly tight…almost too tight. Shinohara cursed and gasped at the sensation of it, trying in vain to control his own breathing. It had been so long, and he was already so hard, it was almost impossible to control himself. 

Juuzou was breathing hard, dripping sweat, back arching as he pushed himself down further and further. He pushed himself back up, just a little, and then down again, moving slowly at first, then pushing a little harder, a little faster. Shinohara was so lost in the bliss of it that he wasn’t even sure anymore which sounds where coming from his own throat and which ones came from Juuzou. Pleasure rang through every part of his body, electricity shooting up and down his spine, fire pooling in his belly until he was groaning, his hands gripping Juuzou’s hips as he fucked into him. Juuzou urged him on, moaning his encouragement until Shinohara was shooting thick strings of come up inside him, groaning strangled by the overwhelming indulgence of the feeling. 

“Shit,” Juuzou breathed, lips twitching. 

Shinohara pulled him down into a kiss, groaning into Juuzou’s lips as his cock slid out, inch by inch. They collapsed there, Juuzou’s limbs tangled around Shinohara as their breathing evened out, as their sweat mingled and dried, as they dozed away in the lamplight. It was midnight by the time Shinohara nudged Juuzou awake and insisted on another shower.

This time, they showered together.


	10. Jason

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shinohara watched him, shaking his head slightly, then looked over at Dr. Chigyou, who hummed thoughtfully. 
> 
> “What is it?” Shinohara asked, raising a brow. 
> 
> “Nothing really…it’s just…Suzuya Juuzou…Jason….Juuzou is the CCG’s Jason.”
> 
> “Huh,” Shinohara rubbed his chin as he watched Juuzou dancing down the hall with his new toy. “It fits him, doesn’t it?”
> 
> “Yeah,” Dr. Chigyou nodded. “I think it does.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I wanted to get another chapter out before school started, and I have! I expect the rest of this fic to go somewhat quickly...I think there's 4-5 chapters remaining, but of course, I originally expected 3 chapters so who knows. 
> 
> Anyway! I want to say a very big thank you to everyone who has commented, messaged me, left kudos...you guys have no idea how much it means to me! Getting feedback means a lot to writers, and I am no exception, so thank you!
> 
> As always, you can find me at [tinyghoulproblem](http://tinyghoulproblem.tumblr.com/) on tumblr. 
> 
> Please enjoy!

Shinohara couldn’t help but smile as he watched Juuzou walk up on the stage and accept his certificate of promotion with a small smile and a bow. He’d insisted that Juuzou brush his hair for the ceremony that morning, and Juuzou had insisted on his red hairclips, so the day had already been an exercise in compromise. Nevertheless, they were here, and there was Juuzou, his Juuzou, climbing to rank 2 more quickly than any investigator in history, save Arima. Shinohara felt so proud that he could hardly contain himself, a grin splitting across his face. Juuzou looked over at him from the stage, and Shinohara offered him a wink. He’d really, truly done it. 

“As expected,” a soft voice said. Shinohara turned to see Arima, who was smiling over at him. 

“You called this one,” Shinohara nodded, speaking under his breath to avoid disrupting the ceremony. He’d been standing at the back so that he could see over the rows and rows of sitting investigators without blocking anyone’s view. Perhaps Arima had shown up late, or perhaps he had wanted to see the ceremony more clearly as well. Either way they stood here now, arm to arm, muttering like a couple of teenagers in church. 

“You’ve done well with him,” Arima muttered. 

“Thank you,” Shinohara replied. “Our time with your squad taught him a lot as well.”

Arima hummed noncommittally, and they stood in silence for the rest of the ceremony. Shinohara had the day off, though he intended to work from home anyway. Tomorrow he would be introducing Akira as the newest member of their team, and Monday they would fetch Juuzou’s quinque, so there wasn’t going to be a whole lot of time for sorting through reports. As the ceremony wound to a close, Arima turned and smiled at Shinohara.   
 “I look forward to seeing what his future holds for him. I know he’ll do well.”

“Yeah,” Shinohara smiled. “Me too.”

With that, he broke away from Arima and made his way over to Amon and Juuzou. Though Amon still seemed disturbed by Juuzou’s unprofessional appearance and behavior, he had somehow managed to come to terms with it. Or, at the least, they were working together in relative harmony now. Shinohara felt that this was a sign of victory, because that made two people that Juuzou could work with. Three, if he felt like counting Houji, but Houji had never worked closely with Juuzou for anything other than training. Training Juuzou was slow going, but this promotion ceremony was all the validation that Shinohara needed for his efforts. It would have been easy, he thought, to consider the progression of his personal relationship with Juuzou as evidence of Juuzou’s personal growth, but he didn’t want to mix business with pleasure…or didn’t want to mix it any more than he already had. Anyway, he could have been misreading the situation as a result of his own desires, and doing so would have been a disservice to Juuzou. Now he could reassure himself with the knowledge that the CCG itself recognized Juuzou’s growth, his achievement. Now, he could simply be happy for his partner, instead of concerned that his own desire was somehow stifling Juuzou.

As he drew closer to them, he saw Juuzou look over and grin, mouth already full of refreshments. 

“Hey Shinohara,” Amon gave a slight bow. 

“Yo,” Shinohara waved back. 

“You’re back to work now, aren’t you?” Amon asked.

“Somehow or another, I guess. Took long enough…in the beginning, I couldn’t even pee on my own.” Shinohara laughed. “Iwaccho was back in two weeks though…what a tough guy!”

“I don’t think his injuries were as severe, though,” Amon offered. Shinohara smiled at his efforts. 

“Enough about me, though. What a great day, to see our very own Crybaby Amon promoted to First Class. I remember when you used to cry like a baby under the academy instructors…now you’re all grown up! It’s so moving…”

In spite of his teasing, Amon bowed deeply and said, “I can’t thank you enough for your recommendation, Special Class Shinohara. Despite my inexperience.”

“Don’t mention it,” Shinohara replied with a shrug. “Iwa and Chinomutsu also gave recommendations, so make sure that you thank them later. Also…” he scratched at the back of his head and sighed. “Mado recommended you as well. We couldn’t show you his will because of that, since those are the rules…but now it’s done, so I can tell you. Before he died, he was petitioning for your promotion. He had high hopes for you, Amon. He truly believed in your ability.”

Amon smiled, looked down at his hands. Shinohara’s words hung heavy between them, with Juuzou watching the entire exchange, wide-eyed and mouth full of cookies. 

“I’ll pay Mr. Mado a visit on my way home,” Amon said, voice soft. 

“Good idea,” Shinohara nodded. Then, guts churning, he continued, “Ah, Amon, that reminds me. There’s something else, since you’ve been promoted now, well, for the time being, we’ve found a partner for you. You should meet them uh….tomorrow.”

“Okay?” Amon replied, brows troubled. “Is there…some kind of problem?”

“Ah, no…it’s just that since you’ve been promoted, I…well, I’ll introduce you properly tomorrow.”

Amon scrutinized him closely, and Shinohara bit his lip. “Ahh, well, oh! Juuzou, are you ready to go get your quinque Monday?” 

“Yeah!” Juuzou grinned. “I heard it turned out pretty great…”

“Seems like it. I told you Dr. Chigyou is very skilled.” 

“I’m so excited!” Juuzou grinned, closed his eyes and sighed. “I can barely wait! I wonder what I should name it?”

“Well, how about you see it first?”

“Okayyyy,” Juuzou huffed. 

“Alright, well. I’m off today. Try to get a chance to relax this weekend, alright, Amon?”

“Yes, sir,” Amon replied. His tone hardly implied he planned to do nothing of the sort, but Shinohara let it go. Instead, he turned to Juuzou and gripped his shoulder. 

“Looks like you’re stuck in the office today. Just make sure you behave, okay?”

“I know,” Juuzou chewed at a piece of chicken. “No problem.”

“Alright,” Shinohara looked at him, feeling a bit dubious. “See you guys later.”

“Bye!” Juuzou waved at him, then set about to wiping the grease off of his fingers. 

“Have a good day, Mr. Shinohara,” Amon nodded. Shinohara just waved and walked over to Iwaccho, who had a cookie in each hand and a grin on his face. 

“Shinohara!” He called out. “Good to see you moving normally again!” 

“As much as I love stumbling around like an old man, I like to think I’ve got a few good years left in me…” Shinohara grinned back at him.

“How about that subordinate of yours? Promoted faster than anybody besides Arima…and well, Arima doesn’t count.”

Shinohara laughed and clapped Iwaccho on the back. “I know, I’m proud of him.”

“I’m proud of _you_. I’ll never forget how you stood up for him in that meeting. Turns out you were right.”

“Guess I gotta be right about something, right?”

“Every once and awhile, anyway,” Iwachho laughed. “Say, I heard you were getting a new team member soon.” 

“Sure enough…” Shinohara leaned toward him. “You know who it is?”

“Yeah, but I don’t wanna say it out loud. I heard _he_ doesn’t know yet.”

“Yeah, and neither does Takki. That kid’s gonna have a conniption fit.”

“Oh yeah, those two get along like cats and dogs, huh?”

“Worse, probably,” Shinohara sighed. “It’s gonna be a fun ride.”

“Eh,” Iwao shrugged. “You’ve dealt with worse. It might be like herding cats, but Houji’s there with you, right?”

“Yeah,” Shinohara laughed. “But…you know Houji.”   “Well….good luck with it, eh?” 

“I’ll need it.”

Iwao finished a cookie and used his now-free hand to pat Shinohara’s back. “Hey, you oughta come over for dinner some time. Takeomi misses you.” 

“Does he?” Shinohara tilted his head. “Or does Mrs. Kuroiwa want me to meet one of her charming friends again?”

Iwao laughed, the sound booming over the conversations of the investigators around them. Shinohara felt his ears go red. 

“Look, I know she…well, she just wants you to settle down with a nice girl, you know? You’re quite a catch, man. No one knows why you never…you know…”

Shinohara shrugged, secretly wishing he hadn’t brought it up. “I’m just not the type to settle down…” he offered lamely. Iwao raised one of his impossibly bushy brows and frowned. 

“Aren’t you a little old for playing the field?”

Shinohara laughed off the comment and shook his head. “You’d be surprised, Iwacchi.”

Iwao laughed and clapped him on the back. “Look, come over. I’ll make sure Hana doesn’t invite any friends.”

“I’ll look forward to it,” Shinohara smiled. There was no getting out of it now, but if it wasn’t a secret blind date, he didn’t mind so much. With a few more words, he said his goodbyes, and made his way toward the door, waving and nodding to other investigators that did the same to him. 

***

The next morning, Shinohara let Juuzou find his own way to the conference room where they were to meet. It surprised him, how much more independent Juuzou was now than he had been back when they’d first been assigned to one another. Shinohara remembered the way that Juuzou used to stay just at his elbow, as if he were ready to hide behind him at any moment. The thought of Juuzou hiding seemed strange—he was more likely to run toward a battle than away from it. Nevertheless, Shinohara assumed it had more to do with his instinctual fight or flight response than with the reality of how he would react in a given situation. Now, though, since Shinohara had been out of work for recovery, Juuzou moved around the CCG with more freedom. He no longer felt cowed by these halls. It was pleasing to see, though it wasn’t without a twinge of…nostalgia, perhaps? Just a hint of the bittersweet. Shinohara chased the feeling away with thoughts of what the day would bring.

He rounded a corner, took a breath, and opened the door. 

“Good morning,” Akira said with a smile. “You ready?”

“I am,” Shinohara smiled.    
“Nervous?” She asked. “You don’t need to be. Amon knows already.”

“What about your old pal from the Academy?”

“Takizawa? He’ll get over it.”

Shinohara wondered what made her so sure, how Amon had found out in less than 24 hours who his new partner would be, and how Akira had managed to know that. Akira was a mysterious girl.

“C’mon,” he nodded toward the door. She gathered up her jacket, and they were on their way. 

“Are you nervous?” he asked, smiling down at her. 

“No, I think nervousness is a silly indulgence and I don’t have time for it. I have been looking into your team’s cases though, and I think I might have some thoughts to offer up.”

“Really?” Shinohara asked. “These investigations did need some fresh blood. Is it your Mado intuition?”

“Maybe,” she laughed. 

“Well I look forward to it.” 

They rode the elevator up to the fifth floor, where the meeting room was located. When they got to the door, Shinohara patted Akira’s back and murmured, “You’re going to do great.”

“I told you,” she replied, “I’m not nervous.”

“Pardon me then,” Shinohara winked. Then he pushed open the door.

“Good morning, everyone! You’ve done well. I have someone I’d like to introduce to you before the morning report. We have a new ally for our investigations here in the 20th ward. Alright, you can come in.”

Akira stepped through the door, surveying the room, her eyes lighting first on Amon, then moving to Houji, Takizawa, and Juuzou.

“Starting today,” Shinohara continued, “Rank 2 Mado Akira has been assigned to our team.”

“I will be investigating under First Class Amon. It’s nice to meet you,” Akira announced.

“Akira! What a surprise!” Houji said with a smile, standing to shake her hand. 

“Mr. Houji, it’s been to long,” Akira said graciously. 

“Why…why is Akira here in the 20th ward?” Takizawa asked, his voice almost shaking as he stood.

“Hey Takizawa,” Akira greeted him. “You look well.”

“Seidou,” Amon asked, “Do you know each other?”

Takizawa stared at Akira with narrowed eyes. “We’re…in the same year.”

Shinohara leaned over to Amon quickly and muttered, “Akira was at the top of her class, and Takki was the second…they don’t get along.”

Amon raised a brow, but Akira had already moved on to Juuzou, who was giving her a smile.

“I’m Suzuya Juuzou,” he said sweetly. “Nice to meet you, Mado.”

“It’s nice to meet you too, Juuzou,” Akira smiled back at him. “I love your stitches…they’re beautiful.” 

Juuzou beamed back at her, and Shinohara smiled. He might have guessed that the two of them would get along in a strange way. They each stood out, having both been considered oddities in their own ways. Not only that, but they were both prodigious. They also inspired Takizawa’s ire, though Shinohara wasn’t sure that was a proper thing to bond over. 

“Akira comes to us with high commendations. She’s served on Arima’s team, and has conducted quite a few investigations in the 1st ward branch. Her skills have been certified by Arima himself, so I’m sure she’ll be an excellent ally. Welcome, Akira,” Shinohara smiled and gestured toward a seat at the conference table.

“Thank you, Mr. Shinohara. It’s nice to meet all of you.”

Getting introductions out of the way was a relief. Shinohara opened up a folder and pulled out the progress reports. 

“Okay, let’s get started. We still haven’t managed to find any recent information regarding the Binge Eater, but we’ve combed through the papers enough to know that it disappeared last year, sometime between September and November. Most likely, we’d be safe considering that it got into some kind of accident, but we’ve got to confirm that. So we’re combing through reports and news articles. Unfortunately, we’ve only got about 30% of those reports completed, even with Nakajima and the other 20th ward staff helping us out. I’m hoping that we get an answer sooner or later, but the problem is time. Going through the documents is very time-consuming.”

He sat down with a weary sigh. “Takki, tell us about the Gourmet.”

Takizawa stood up, his line of his brow serious, determined. Shinohara nodded his encouragement. 

“In regards to the Gourmet, we’ve recently verified that he’s taking action outside of the 20th ward. So far, we’ve seen him appear and disappear in the 7th, 8th, and 18th wards. The investigators in those wards have helped us to nail down the details. The investigation into the Ghoul Restaurant is ongoing in the 7th ward, and the investigators there intend to look into that tomorrow. There’s no denying that the Gourmet has a connection to that ward, so we’ll see what they find.”

“I wonder why the Gourmet has been so fussy about this ward recently?” Shinohara asked, rubbing his chin in thought. “Maybe he found targets he desired in the other wards?

“No,” Akira’s voice rung out through the room. Every head turned toward her. “The main dish is moving around the wards.”

“Huh?” Takizawa glared at Akira.

“Go on,” Shinohara urged her. Maybe this was the intuition she’d referred to.

“Well…did an accident or something happen to him during the time when he was inactive? Or was he recovering from an attack by another ghoul? After that period of inactivity, predation incidents linked to him climbed sharply, then peaked before dropping again.” Akira pointed to the graph where each predation incident was recorded. 

“Now, he was clearly holding back in January of this year, then, starting a few days ago, predation incidents finally started up again-…”

“You’re intuition is pretty sharp, isn’t it, Rank 2 Mado?” Takizawa sniped.

“If it’s sharp, then I’d appreciate it if you’d listen to me, Rank 2 Takizawa,” Akira shot back. Shinohara sighed. 

Akira continued. “If we compare the graph and the maps together, then it seems that the Gourmet is acting erratically, compared to his usual patterns. He’s been coming and going through the 18th, 7th, and 8th wards only. Though we always assumed he was headquartered in the 20th ward, he’s typically moved about with absolute freedom, seeking whatever food he desires. But now, that’s changed. Now, he’s acting like something has enslaved him, obsessed him, maybe. He’s not as picky as he used to be—he can’t be, when he’s confined to just those few wards. This is obviously contrary to his usual aesthetics.”

Akira took a breath, then continued, “He’s only eating from those three wards to ‘make do,’ because his goal is a completely different predation target. It could be a drawn-out battle with a difficult opponent…whatever it is, that target is most likely located in the 6th ward.”

Shinohara raised a brow. It was a brilliant deduction, or set of deductions, really. He tried to find holes to poke in the argument, but honestly, it was a solid theory. But Akira wasn’t done yet. 

“Since he wants to avoid making his intended prey feel cautious, he’s hunting in the 7th, 8th, and 18th wards. The 22nd and 23rd wards were on special precaution before the Aogiri raid, so it’s likely the his target is in the 6th ward.”

“Very good,” Houji smiled, “So most likely, our target is also in the 6th ward.”

“Mr…Mr. Houji?” Takizawa gaped at his superior. 

“So you’re saying that there’s someone who the Gourmet can’t eat. If you’re right, that would be fascinating,” Shinohara nodded, rubbing his chin with his hand. 

Amon stared at Akira in silence, but Takizawa was already griping at Akira, telling her she was insufferable. Shinohara shushed him and shook his head wearily. 

“Akira, that’s a great theory. Houji, Takki, please continue your investigation with Akira’s theory in mind.”

“Looking forward to it,” Houji said, his usual gentle smile playing across his features. “Akira, can I come to you if I have further questions?”

“Of course, Mr. Houji.” Akira said with a smile. Takizawa looked as if he might be physically ill. 

“Well, very good. Amon, I’ll let you report your findings tomorrow so that you have time to give your new subordinate a debriefing.”

“Yes, sir,” Amon replied, though he still looked a little shocked. 

“You’re all working very hard,” Shinohara smiled at the group. “Please, continue your good work. Juuzou and I will be in the library.”

Juuzou sighed and rolled his eyes, but he, like Amon, seemed more interested in Akira than anything else. Shinohara smiled. Unlike Juuzou, she knew how to make a strong first impression. He was still nervous at the thought of her working under Amon, but if anything, she’d shown that she was going to be a valuable asset to their team. Shinohara was glad to have her…even if Takizawa couldn’t seem to keep the daggers from his glare. 

“C’mon, Juuzou,” Shinohara nodded toward the door.

“Fiiiiine,” Juuzou called back to him before slinking out of his seat. They walked away to the sound of Akira and Takizawa bickering.

***

Shinohara was, despite his best efforts, nodding off over a stack of papers. He didn’t want to fall asleep, but it was so difficult to stay awake when they were in this cool, quiet reading room in the library, a sunbeam cutting in from the single, small window. It spilled across his back as he leaned forward over the reports, the news articles, the papers that contained mountains of information, none of it pertinent to his investigation. There had to be a better way to do this, a way that didn’t require such a wide-sweeping process of elimination…but he hadn’t come up with anything yet, and since most of this information had to remain un-digitized for security purposes, there was no way to quickly search for keywords. 

When he realized that he’d read the same line of text at least five times without retaining any information, he leaned back in his chair, stretched, and smacked his palm lazily at his cheek. 

“I knew it,” Juuzou muttered, yes flicking over to him. “You’re bored too.”

“What can I say?” Shinohara sighed. “This is tough. I guess our investigations can’t be all glamour and gore.” 

“They should be,” Juuzou sighed, rubbing at his eyes. “I bet Mr. Arima never has to do this paperwork bullshit.”

“Juuzou,” Shinohara said, reproachful.

“Oh?” Juuzou smirked back at him. “I’m not supposed to say that?”

“Not at work. Remember what we talked about…professionalism at work?”

Juuzou rolled his eyes and went back to the paperwork with a frown. 

“But on Monday, you get your quinque. So there’s that to look forward to.”

Juuzou smiled, stared off at the wall dreamily. “That’s true. I hope we get sent out on a mission soon, so I can use it….”

“Me too…” Shinohara sighed. Though he understood the importance of the task at hand, he never had been one for desk work. He was an investigator, and no matter how many times he was hurt and hospitalized, no matter how many months he spent in recovery, he would never stop throwing himself into missions head-first. He’d stopped questioning the sanity of such an approach long ago. Some people fought fires for a living, others drove race cars. Shinohara fought ghouls for a living, and a part of him loved the rush of it. It wasn’t the fighting or the killing that he enjoyed; those were just necessities in this line of work. What he enjoyed was the rush of finding a long-sought answer, the danger of facing a creature that could kill him and not knowing whether or not he would survive it. 

In a way, he understood the way that Juuzou threw himself into deadly situations. Perhaps that was why he couldn’t justify lecturing him for it. 

“So how come we can’t just give this to the bureau guys and go find some ghouls? I bet Arima’s in the 24th ward. I bet he could use some help…”

Shinohara laughed. “Maybe so, but we’re stuck here for now, Juuzou.”

Juuzou parked his chin on his hand and looked out the window wistfully. Silence filled the room around them and Shinohara returned to his papers, privately lusting after an iced coffee with caramel flavor and a dash of cream. As he finished his document and flipped open the next one, Juuzou spoke again.

“Mr. Shinohara…”

“Yes?”

“Well, we think that the ghoul was in an accident right?”

“Yes, between September and November.”

“So why aren’t we looking at the police thingies?”

“Police logs? We just haven’t gotten that far yet. We’ll look at those after we look at the CCG files.”

“Why? If there was an accident isn’t it more likely the police would be called?”

Shinohara considered this for a moment, rubbing his hand over the patch of hair at his chin. 

“I suppose that’s true, Juuzou. Good thinking. The police files are all searchable on the library computers. Want to go look through them?”

Juuzou shrugged. “I dunno how though.”

“I’ll show you,” Shinohara nodded toward the door. “Let’s go.” 

It took a little while to log into the correct database and figure out the most useful search parameters, but eventually they were both scrolling through accident reports from September. It was still time-consuming work since they had no solid information about the Binge Eater’s name, appearance, or age, but Shinohara had a feeling they were pulling closer, gaining ground. He was no Mado, but after years of investigating, he had a feeling for a good lead. He tore through the records, making notes about cases that seemed relevant in his tablet. Juuzou scrolled through cases as well, his eyes wide and reflecting the blue light of the screen. He certainly seemed more interested in police logs than he had been in the stacks of paper. Shinohara stole glances at him now and again, noting to himself the way that Juuzou licked his small, plush lips, the way he rubbed his chin while he read. Soon enough, Shinohara found himself licking his own lips, and he looked away quickly. 

He was only human, and it was difficult to look at Juuzou without thinking about all that they had done…all that they could do, that they had yet to do. It occurred to him that Juuzou was doing a better job focusing on the task at hand than he was. He sighed, chagrined, and tried to focus on the task at hand. 

“What?” Juuzou asked, looking over at him. 

“Nothing,” Shinohara smiled back. 

Juuzou hummed, suspicious, but he returned to his work anyway. 

Shinohara figured he had been caught, but he returned to his work as well. It was Friday…only a few hours left, and they would have the weekend to themselves.

***

“I have an idea,” Shinohara muttered. He was lying on the couch reading through the newspaper on his tablet, Juuzou laying on top of him, drawing on a sketchbook that was balanced across his chest. They often laid like this, though Shinohara’s arms eventually tired from holding the tablet aloft high enough to allow for Juuzou’s sketching. He didn’t mind. It was a treat to feel Juuzou’s small frame pressed against him this way, inch for inch. There was a comfort there that he never would have expected to find in a relationship that differed so sharply from any he’d had before. 

“Hmmmmm?” Juuzou pressed his marker against the pages of his sketchbook, holding it with his entire fist, like a child. 

“Have you ever been to the aquarium?”

“Nope.”

“Do you want to go?”

“Is it boring?”

“I don’t think so.” 

Juuzou looked up long enough to scrutinize Shinohara’s face, as if searching for some kind of trick. 

“What do you do there?” He finally asked.

“Look at animals and fish…sometimes they have shows, with dolphins or penguins. But mostly you just walk around look at beautiful things.”

“And it’s fun?”

“It is. And it’s….it’s a nice thing to do with someone you like.” 

Juuzou’s brows raised slightly. “Like a date?”

Shinohara knew that he had been caught, so he grinned and nodded. “Yeah, just exactly like that.” 

“Well, if it’s for a date I guess I will go with you,” Juuzou said, capping his marker and rolling off of Shinohara unceremoniously. “I’m gonna go get dressed!”

“Me too,” Shinohara said, pushing himself up off the couch. 

He ended up in jeans, a t-shirt, and tennis shoes, while Juuzou wore a white tank top, long shorts, and sneakers. The train was fairly busy, crowded with tourists and natives alike, and Shinohara understood why. It was a beautiful day, and the island where the aquarium was located had popular beaches and other attractions. Juuzou sat by the window, staring out as the world flew past. 

Shinohara returned to his tablet, to his news headlines, but he was startled when he felt Juuzou’s small hand fitting itself with his own. Immediately, he looked around, but no one was looking at them. Still, he was tense, his shoulders stiff. Juuzou frowned up at him. 

“Why’re you like that?” he asked.

“Well…Juuzou…we’re…we’re in public…” Shinohara whispered back, trying to make sure he didn’t draw any attention. 

“Mr. Shinohara,” Juuzou sighed. “We’re not even at work. Nobody here knows us. Why do you even want to go on a date if you’re just gonna act like we’re not on a date?”

“Because…I….it’s…” Shinohara could feel his cheeks burning. How could he explain this feeling to Juuzou? The shame of it overwhelmed him. 

“Yeah?” Juuzou asked, insisting on an answer.

“I just…in public, I don’t…usually…do this…”

Juuzou stared at him for a moment longer, then withdrew his hand, crossed his arms, and went back to staring out the window. Shinohara stared at him for a moment, then sighed and returned to his tablet. It was no use, he couldn’t concentrate; the more he thought about it, the worse he felt. He tried to rationalize, to tell himself that Juuzou would feel the same way if he had been privy to the sorts of things that were said about men who…well, who were like them. But the more he tried to rationalize it, the more ashamed he felt. People who saw Juuzou often assumed that he was a girl, and even if they didn’t, they looked down on him for his messy hair, his strange style. Even investigators at the CCG looked down on Juuzou, treated him like some sort of pariah…it wasn’t until he bagged Jason that people started to look at him differently. 

And Shinohara…well, he was generally respected by those around him. He’d never let on about what went on in his bedroom, not even to Iwaccho. He’d always wondered if people guessed it about him, had always wondered if there were whispers of it…but he’d been careful. He’d always been so careful. Now, dating someone from work—his much-younger _partner_ , no less—he was taking a risk like never before. And though Juuzou occupied so many of his thoughts, so much of his time, when it came to public displays of affection, even the smallest gesture felt like a risk. Truth be told, he had a great deal to lose…a great deal more than Juuzou, from what he could tell.

Still, it surprised him that Juuzou was so open, that he even wanted to engage in any way out in the open like this. It wasn’t exactly typical, but then again, Juuzou wasn’t either. He stole glances at Juuzou, who stared out the window resolutely, and hoped that he wasn’t too upset by the fact that Shinohara hadn’t wanted to hold his hand. He vowed to try and make it up to Juuzou, though he wasn’t entirely sure how. 

Eventually, they made it to the island, and then to the aquarium. Though Juuzou looked dubious at first, the jellyfish exhibit quickly changed his mind, the wonder of it chasing away any lingering unhappiness form the train ride. He stared at the huge jellyfish tanks, mouth wide open, eyes following the billowing, colorful shapes as they moved through the water. Shinohara watched him with a smile on his face, some of his earlier concern mollified by the look of wonder in Juuzou’s great, dark eyes. They moved on to see the penguins, which delighted Juuzou endlessly with their silly waddling about, and then the seals who did tricks and barked at one another like dogs. Juuzou was utterly bored by the sea turtles, but the dolphins were enough to get him excited again. They stopped by the food court for snacks, Shinohara consulting the map to see what else they should do. 

“What’s a touch pool?” Juuzou asked, looking over the map. 

“Oh, it’s where you can feed some of the animals and touch them.”

“Can you touch a shark?”

“I don’t think so…” Shinohara laughed. A memory surfaced, then…something he’d heard a long time ago, about Juuzou and animals. He frowned, an uneasy feeling pooling in his gut. At the time, he hadn’t been sure whether or not he believed it, but there was still a question in his mind. He looked over at Juuzou, who was licking an ice cream cone with gusto, and wondered if all of his violence had ever been directed at animals. He’d seen how Juuzou treated ghouls, and even humans. Though he hadn’t hurt anyone in quite some time, Shinohara had no way of gauging what he might have been capable of before they met. It gave him a feeling of uneasiness in his gut, which he tried to ignore He didn’t really want to ask, but he wanted to _know_. 

“Anyway, I want to go, even if you can’t pet a shark.” 

“Okay,” Shinohara replied, finishing the last of his own ice cream cone. “Promise me you’ll be careful, though?”

“Yeah, yeah.”

Shinohara figured that was all of the reassurance he was likely to get. They made their way to the touch pools, where Juuzou had the chance to pet all kinds of creatures native to the area. Shinohara watched him carefully, but he was nothing but gentle, dragging small, trembling fingers over starfish and other little creatures that Shinohara recognized but couldn’t name. Juuzou walked all around, eyes wide, humming at the tanks before gingerly dipping his fingers in. After a few minutes, he ran back to Shinohara and grinned. 

“You were wrong, Mr. Shinohara! They have baby sharks over here!” 

“No way!” Shinohara grinned. “Show me.”

He followed Juuzou over to the tank where the baby sharks were, and they each managed to touch a few of them, Juuzou giggling at the rough feeling of their skin and the way they swam slowly through the water. Watching him there, the smile on his lips, the way his eyes lit up, it was impossible to imagine Juuzou hurting an animal. Then again, Shinohara never would have guessed that he could dispose of dangerous ghouls with a small quinque knife, either. It was a side of Juuzou that few people ever saw—his pure, child-like enthusiasm—and Shinohara realized that it was one of the things that he found so enticing. Juuzou’s world was far simpler than the one that Shinohara inhabited. Perhaps simple was the wrong descriptor…perhaps it was just purer, less inhibited. Just like with holding hands on the train, Juuzou didn’t seem to care for social conventions. It made Shinohara reconsider himself for a moment. 

But then Juuzou was done with the touch pools, so they moved along to walk through the deep sea exhibit. Before they left, Juuzou insisted that they stop by the gift shop, where Shinohara somehow ended up buying him a stuffed penguin and a package of gummy sharks. Smiling and exhausted, they walked back to the train and collapsed into their seats, Juuzou chattering about everything they’d seen, mouth blue with gummy sharks. 

The sun was setting in the distance, casting pink light over the train car, which was full of tired beach-goers and tourists tapping through pictures on their phones. Shinohara smiled contentedly. 

“Anyway,” Juuzou smacked his gummies loudly, “I like aquariums! But especially sharks. Petting sharks is the best part.” 

“Why’s that?” Shinohara asked, admiring the way that Juuzou’s hair looked pink in the fading light.

“Because everybody’s scared of them, but they aren’t even scary at all.”

“Remind you of anything?” Shinohara smiled.

“Ummm….” Juuzou kicked his feet, which couldn’t quite touch the floor from where he sat, pushed back into the seat. “Not really. Why?”

“Oh,” Shinohara sighed, leaning back in his seat and closing his eyes, “No reason.” 

***  
Monday came quickly, and as Shinohara had predicted, Juuzou was up early, tearing around the house in his excitement. Shinohara moved a little slower, stretching and yawning and trying to get down some instant coffee and a protein bar before Juuzou pushed him out the door in his excitement. 

“I can’t wait to see it!” Juuzou yelled, running down the hall to the elevator. Shinohara followed behind, having given up on keeping up with Juuzou some time ago. 

“Come onnnnn!” Juuzou called from the elevator, and Shinohara quickened his step. 

“I’m coming, I’m coming,” he called back. Eventually they made it to the lab, located in the 1st ward, about a mile from the CCG main headquarters. Juuzou practically ran through security, flashing his badge and sighing loudly when the guards yelled at him to come back so they could take a better look at it. 

When they made it inside the lab, Juuzou’s jaw dropped and he formed binoculars around his eyes with his fingers. 

“Woah!” he called out, “It’s huge!”

“Yep,” Shinohara smiled. “This is the CCG’s lab division…where all of the anti-ghoul weapons are made. They don’t just make quinques here…they also make Q-bullets, RC gates…and all of the research about ghouls is done in this one place. Well, all the research in Japan, anyway.”

Juuzou opened his mouth to speak when a voice rang out from down the hall, “Special Class Shinohara!”

Shinohara turned and smiled at the shaggy-haired man that walked toward them. “Hello, Dr. Chigyou.”

“Hello,” the doctor smiled. 

“Juuzou, this is the doctor who made your quinque. He’s an incredible scientist who worked at the GFG before he came here.”

“GFG?” Juuzou asked, pressing a finger to his lips. “What’s that?”

“It’s the German anti-ghoul organization…like the CCG for Germany.”

Juuzou turned toward Dr. Chigyou, his face suddenly becoming very serious. 

“While hiding your stomach with your right hand, bow your head…one…two…” he muttered. Then, a little louder, he said, “I am Suzuya Juuzou.”

“So it’s you?” Chigyou asked with a smile. “You’re so young! I wanted to make the quinque match your design….”

“They gave me a bunch of different designs, but none of those were any good, so I drew my own…were you able to make it?” Juuzou asked, staring up at Dr. Chigyou hopefully.

“More or less,” Chigyou answered. “Making a quinque requires advanced biotechnological chrystalization. We have to understand biological concepts as well as mechanical engineering. We also have to understand the design that will bring out the maximum power of the quinque. All of these factors are required to surpass the original strength of the kagune. Follow me.”

Juuzou nodded as they fell into step behind the doctor. “Hey, I’ve been wondering, can’t you just use a kagune as a quinque?”

“Ah, not quite,” Dr. Chigyou answered as they walked. “With human technology, you can’t just make a kagune. Suzuyacchi, your question tells me that you never graduated from the academy. Is that so?”

“Yep,” Juuzou grinned, “I got in through the back door.”

“Ah,” Shinohara clapped a hand on Juuzou’s shoulder. “Don’t just say it outright like that, okay?”

Juuzou sighed. 

“Well…do you understand the difference between kagune and quinques?” Dr. Chigyou asked.

“Um…well, one has a switch and the other does?”

“Well, you’re not wrong,” Chigyou nodded. “As long as a kakuhou creates and transmits RC cells, a kagune can come from inside a ghouls body. But that doesn’t work with quinques. Since quinques can’t consume humans, we inject a preservative into it to keep it working. Because of that, the most important thing with any quinque is energy conservation.”

“That’s the nice thing about Arata,” Shinohara smiled, though the memory of Arata taking it’s energy from him was still painful. 

“Exactly,” Chigyou smiled. “See, the place where the kagune originates is where the RC cells spill out of the kakuhou. During formation, the RC cells come together. During the attachment phase, those cells come together and show you the basic shape of the kagune. During the decay phase, the connection between the cells expires and they come apart. Then the cycle starts again. That’s why ukase ghouls have floating kagune; their cycle is the fastest. Koukaku ghouls have a long attachment time, so their kagune need continuous maintenance. Right now, we have no way of replicating this process, specifically the ability to created quinques that are flexible or change shape. In other words, in order to conserve energy, quinques are limited to a single shape. The number of RC cells in the kakuhou give the quinque it’s hardness. Got it?”

Juuzou stared up at Chigyou and muttered, “Kinda…” with wide eyes. 

Shinohara laughed. “We can review it later, okay?”

“No problem. At any rate, we’re here. Suzuyacchi, your long-awaited quinque is right here.”

They stood before a long platform which was covered with a white sheet. The sheet obscured the weapon beneath it, but Dr. Chigyou grasped it and pulled it away quickly, with a bit of a dramatic flare. The weapon he revealed was like no other quinque Shinohara had yet seen. When Juuzou had showed him the design of a reaper’s scythe, Shinohara had wondered if it could even be done. But Dr. Chigyou had created something beautiful, and Juuzou walked toward it, extending his fingers toward the handle reverently.

“What do you think?” Dr. Chigyou asked. “It’s amazing, isn’t it? This is a 5000 class monster…meaning that it manifests 5000 RC cells per second. There aren’t any rank 2 investigators carrying something like this…though I imagine the authorization was given after considering the investigator that captured it.” 

Juuzou lifted the quinque up off the platform, starry-eyed.

“Now then, this quinque had a gimmick, so in order to use it…uh…hey…Suzuacchi?”

But it was too late, Juuzou was already tearing away from them at breakneck speed, spinning the huge scythe in his hands. 

Shinohara tried to call out to him, but all that came out was a strangled sort of noise. 

“I’m gonna do a test cut!” Juuzou yelled, running toward a huge block of quinque steel. 

Shinohara buried his face in his hands, flinching when he heard the whooshing noise of a weapon being swung through the air, the scream of the quinque cutting through steel, the resounding clanging of the steel falling to the ground. He was vaguely aware of Dr. Chigyou’s yelling, Juuzou’s laughing, the shocked muttering of the other researchers. Shinohara dragged his hands down his face with a loud sigh, fixing a stern gaze on Juuzou, though he didn’t seem to notice it or care. 

“Amazing!” Juuzou grinned, “Can I name it?”

“Yeah,” Dr. Chigyou replied, visibly shaken. “Uh yeah, of course. It’s popular to name it after the investigation target it was harvested from…though Investigator Iwao always names his after himself.”

“In that case,” Juuzou grinned, holding the handle of his scythe close to him, “This will be 13’s Jason.”

“So Jason is okay then?” Dr. Chigyou asked, “That name is gaining prestige these days…”

“Yeah!” Juuzou rubbed his cheek against the handle of the scythe, the lifted it above his head and ran off down the hall yelling, “Nice to meet you, my Jason!”

Shinohara watched him, shaking his head slightly, then looked over at Dr. Chigyou, who hummed thoughtfully. 

“What is it?” Shinohara asked, raising a brow. 

“Nothing really…it’s just…Suzuya Juuzou…Jason….Juuzou is the CCG’s Jason.”

“Huh,” Shinohara rubbed his chin as he watched Juuzou dancing down the hall with his new toy. “It fits him, doesn’t it?”

“Yeah,” Dr. Chigyou nodded. “I think it does.” 

“Well,” Shinohara turned toward the doctor and shrugged. “Looks like we’re going to be off! I’m sure he’s going to want to spend the rest of the day practicing.” 

Dr. Chigyou smiled. “I hope it serves him well. It was…an interesting design to work on. There’s a few things he needs to know, but I’ll drop by the practice grounds later and show him.”

“That would be great, if it’s not any trouble.”

“No trouble,” Chigyou shrugged. 

Shinohara patted him on the back. “Thanks, Doc. I guess I’m gonna have to go make sure he doesn’t hurt anyone with that thing.”

Dr. Chigyou laughed. “Yeah….good luck, Shinohara.”

“Thanks,” Shinohara laughed and shook his head. “Looks like I’ll need it.”


	11. Sleuthing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Silence fell over the room for a moment, the information digesting in the minds of the team. Finally, Amon said, “Looks like we need to keep investigating the young man. We’ll need to talk to the students at the university, and…” but he went quiet. Shinohara raised a brow. 
> 
> “Um,” Nagachika broke in, “I know that student…I mean…Kaneki is…Kaneki is my close friend.”
> 
> Everyone turned toward him.
> 
> “What a coincidence…” Shinohara said without an ounce of conviction. “Nagachika, what do you know?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am deeply sorry for the long wait! Comments and kudos are always deeply appreciated.

“Hey,” Juuzou said softly. They were parked before the library computers, where they had spent the last several days combing through police reports. The work was tedious, and so far, it hadn’t yielded any results. Shinohara blinked sleepily and looked over at him. 

“Yeah?”

“I…I think I found something weird…”

Shinohara scooted over on his rolling chair, already feeling more alert. 

“What is it?” 

“Well, it says here there was an accident…at a construction site, metal beams fell on a boy and a girl. They were rushed to the hospital but the notes…the notes say ‘follow up investigation may be needed for doctor - transplant without consent,’ do you think that’s…weird?”

“Yeah…” Shinohara hummed. “Transplants without consent aren’t legal. I bet there’s something in the news about it.”

He rolled back to his computer and tapped a few keys quickly, searching “organ transplant non consent october.” Pages of results popped up from news outlets all over the country. 

“Good work,” Shinohara said with a grin. 

“Really?” Juuzou grinned back at him, rolling his chair over in Shinohara’s direction. “Thanks!”

“Okay…so the doctor is one Kanou Akihiro. I wonder if he’s got some kind of record?” Shinohara hummed thoughtfully and pulled up the CCG databases. 

“Woah,” Juuzou said eyebrows raising at the results. “He was…a CCG employee?”

“Yep,” Shinohara nodded. “Looks like he was involved with ghoul autopsy some years ago…”

“Ghoul autopsy?” Juuzou tilted his head. 

“Cutting open their bodies after death for research.”

“Sounds fun…” Juuzou smiled. “Why did he leave?”

“Who knows,” Shinohara shrugged. “But it looks like he works at Kanou General Hospital…Kanou hospital….must be…” his fingers flew over the keys, and another page of search results came up. 

“Ah, it’s a family enterprise.”

“What does that mean?” Juuzou asked. 

“It means his dad was the director of the hospital. Must have been a pretty easy place to find work…”

Juuzou hummed softly. 

“Well…wanna get out of this library and go talk to him?”

Juuzou’s eyes lit up and he nodded furiously. “Pleaaaassseee Mr. Shinohara, and also lets get ice cream.”

“Okay,” Shinohara smiled, already standing to get his jacket. “After we question him.”

“Deal!”

***

They made their way to Kanou General Hospital, which was surprisingly close to CCG headquarters. Shinohara hadn’t called ahead; it could mean the doctor wouldn’t be available, but he also wanted to catch the man off guard if possible. They were more likely to get information if he hadn’t had time to rehearse his speech. 

At the front desk, a nurse greeted them warmly. Shinohara showed her his badge and asked for Dr. Kanou, but she shook her head. 

“I’m sorry, sir. He’s on an extended vacation outside the country. I’m afraid he’s unreachable until he returns.”

“And when will that be?” Shinohara asked, a smile still on his face. “So that we can clear this matter up?”

“I’m not sure,” she shrugged. “He just said he would be gone for awhile.”

“And you have no idea where he’s gone?”

“No,” the nurse shook her head. “He didn’t leave any information about that.”

“Okay,” Shinohara looked down at Juuzou and raised a brow. “Nurse, did you happen to work here last October?”

“Yes,” she said, fidgeting with her hands. 

“Did you work with the boy who received the organ transplant?”

“Um,” she shook her head. “No, but I can’t talk about it anyway.”

“Actually,” Shinohara leaned over the counter and smiled. “You have to. All civilians must cooperate with CCG investigations. I’d really rather have a nice conversation here than get….anyone else involved, you know?”

“Yes,” she nodded, swallowing. “Um…I can look up the records for you, would that be helpful?”

“Very much so,” Shinohara nodded. “Thank you, nurse.”

She tapped at the keys with shaking fingers and clicked through a few screens. Juuzou had gotten his hands on a medical mask, which he was wearing like a hat. Shinohara frowned at him and he rolled his eyes and pulled it off. 

“Oh, here it is,” the nurse said, “His name was Kaneki Ken. 19 years old. He’s a student at Kamii University…maybe you can find him there?”

“Thank you,” Shinohara said, sliding his card across the counter toward her. “If anyone has contact with the doctor, have him call me, okay?”

“Yes, sir,” the nurse nodded. 

“Ready, Juuzou?” 

“Yup,” Juuzou said, half of his face obscured by the mask. “Let’s go!”

As they walked out of the hospital, Juuzou turned to Shinohara. “Hey, can I tell you something?”

“Of course,” Shinohara stopped and looked down at him. “What is it?”

“Well…Kaneki Ken…student at Kamii…I ran into him one time.”

“What do you mean you ran into him?” Shinohara asked, brows furrowed.

“Well I mean…when we first came here to the 20th ward I um…well…I didn’t ask you for money for dinner soooooo I thought I would ummm just…get money from….strangers….”

“So you were pickpocketing?”

“Uh…well, maybe.”

Shinohara sighed. “Okay, we can talk about that later. So what happened? You picked his pocket?”

“Yeah,” Juuzou shrugged. “He didn’t have much money.” 

“Well, that’s a strange coincidence…but he lives here, so I guess it’s not impossible.”

“Yeah but…uh…I saw him again, later.”

“Where?”

“During the attack on Aogiri.”

Shinohara’s brows shot up, and he leaned closer to Juuzou. “You saw him at Aogiri headquarters?”

“Yeah,” Juuzou shifted around uncomfortably. “I saw him from the roof.”

“And you’re sure it’s him?”

“Yeah,” his tone was confirmation enough for Shinohara. “It was definitely him.”

“What was he doing there?” Shinohara asked, stroking his chin. “Seems strange for an ordinary college student to be there…no, more than strange. We evacuated everyone…and that was in another ward entirely. There’s no reason for him to be there.”

He puzzled over it for a little longer, then shook his head. “Let’s go to Kamii, okay?”

“Yeah!” Juuzou grinned. 

“And when you see him, you should pay him back,” Shinohara added.

“What? Why?” Juuzou frowned. 

“Because you stole from him. He probably had to pay to replace all of those cards, not to mention the cash…”

“He had _barely any_ ,” Juuzou pouted. “It wasn’t even enough for noodles.”

“Still,” Shinohara shook his head. “You must repay it.”

Juuzou sighed loudly, but fell in step with Shinohara as they left the hospital. 

At Kamii, their first stop was at the registrar’s office. Shinohara flashed his badge and Juuzou followed his example, holding his badge up with a grin and a bright, “Hello!” The clerk eyed him, taking in his wild hair and stitches, and blinked. 

“Uh, hello investigators…how can I assist you?” he asked nervously.

“We’re here to talk to one of your students…Kaneki Ken?” Shinohara asked with a smile.

“Hold on,” the clerk muttered, tapping away at his computer. Shinohara looked down at Juuzou, who winked back up at him. 

“Okay…um, I’m sorry, but he hasn’t been in class for quite some time now.”

“Could you tell us when he stopped coming to class?” Shinohara asked mildly.

“Uh…about six months ago, it seems.”

“And do you have any information on his whereabouts?”

“I have his last known address, but as far as I know, he’s a missing person. This isn’t in the records, but I’ve seen…missing person’s flyers up around campus for the last few months.”

“Do you know who put up the flyers?” Shinohara asked, brow arched.

“No, only that whoever it is keeps putting up new ones…every month or so. There might still be some up.”

“Okay,” Shinohara nodded. “Thank you for your help.”

“Yeah!” Juuzou nodded. “Thanks!”

“It’s no trouble,” the clerk said, still eyeing Juuzou.

As they walked away, Shinohara squeezed Juuzou’s shoulder and said, “Lets see if we can find those posters.”

Juuzou hummed and giggled. “This is fun, Mr. Shinohara. Way more fun than walking around randomly or looking through papers.”

“I agree,” Shinohara smiled. “But it’s all important, you know?”

“I guess,” Juuzou shrugged. 

***

“Hey everyone,” Shinohara said as we walked through the door of their office. “Good work today.”

Juuzou walked beside him, his slippers flipping loudly against the linoleum. 

“Now listen up. We might have found a clue about the Binge Eater.”

Akira looked up at him with an arched brow. 

“Really?” Amon asked, a stunned look on his face. They had been standing in the office with the part-timer, Nagachika, who had recently been assigned to shadow them on their case. Shinohara still wasn’t sure how he felt about Nagachika, but since Maru had declared him useful to the investigation, Shinohara wasn’t to concerned about it. Maru may have been an asshole, but he had his reasons. 

“Yeah,” Shinohara nodded. “Juuzou helped me research every incident report from last fall, namely September through November, when the Binge Eater vanished. We went through it all with a fine-toothed comb and found ourselves something interesting. It was the October ‘falling steel’ incident.”

“I remember that,” Amon frowned. “The doctor did an organ transplant from the girl to the boy without the family’s permission. He caught a lot of flack for that move, too.”

“Yeah,” Shinohara confirmed. “It gets even more interesting from there. The doctor who performed the transplant is Kanou…a former CCG autopsy doctor.”

“A CCG doctor?” Akira echoed slowly.

“Yep.” Shinohara confirmed. “But when we went to find him, he wasn’t at the hospital and, from what I can tell, he’s concealed his whereabouts. And furthermore, the patient who received the transplant is a young man going to Kamii University…whose whereabouts are also unknown. We just got back from enquiring about him at the university. He hasn’t come to class or been seen for almost half a year. No one seems to know where to locate him. So both the one who performed the surgery and the one who received the organs have gone missing…seems fishy, right? So what if…the deceased woman was the Binge Eater?”

Silence fell over the room for a moment, the information digesting in the minds of the team. Finally, Amon said, “Looks like we need to keep investigating the young man. We’ll need to talk to the students at the university, and…” but he went quiet. Shinohara raised a brow. 

“Um,” Nagachika broke in, “I know that student…I mean…Kaneki is…Kaneki is my close friend.”

Everyone turned toward him.

“What a coincidence…” Shinohara said without an ounce of conviction. “Nagachika, what do you know?”

“Well, he was in the accident after going on a date with a girl he met in a coffee shop. She was the one who was killed…he got an organ transplant, but he wasn’t the same after that. I mean, I just figured that he was struggling with the accident and the guilt or something…anyway, about six months ago he disappeared.”

“And he didn’t tell you where he was going?” Shinohara asked. 

“No,” Nagachika replied, looking down at his feet. “I tried to contact him, and I put up missing person’s posters everywhere I could think to, but no one saw him, and no one ever called me.”

“Well, I suppose that answers one question. No one we talked to knew where the posters came from,” Shinohara sighed, rubbing his chin. “Nagachika, can you tell me how you came to this position?”

“Well,” Nagachika rubbed his chin. “I answered an advertisement.”

“And how did you come to be paired up with actual investigators? Surely you know that isn’t a typical assignment for a part timer.”

Nagachika smiled shyly and looked over at Amon. Shinohara felt his suspicions about the boy growing greater by the second. 

“Uh, well, I have this hobby where I like to put tracking devices on people who seem dangerous. One time I tracked this man…he was a ghoul. And since I worked here, I figured out that the place he was going must have been Aogiri’s hideout.”

“Jason!” Juuzou called out suddenly. “I killed him! But there was something on his shoe. Must’ve been your tracking thing!”

Shinohara looked at Juuzou, surprised. “You never mentioned that.”

“Didn’t figure it was important,” Juuzou shrugged. 

“Well, Mr. Marude thought I might be able to help Ms. Mado and Mr. Amon. And that’s why I’m here.”

“That’s a fascinating story,” Shinohara said, not bothering to hide the suspicion in his tone. “Tell me, Nagachika…what coffee shop was it? The one where Kaneki met the girl?”

“It’s not far from here,” Nagachika shrugged. “It’s called ‘Anteiku.’”

“I guess that will be our next stop,” Shinohara nodded. “Thank you for your information, Nagachika.”

Nagachika smiled. “Anything I can do to help.”

***

“So we’re gonna go tomorrow?” Juuzou asked. He was laying on the couch with his head in Shinohara’s lap, playing a game on his phone, kicking his feet slowly in the air. 

“Yeah,” Shinohara smiled down at him. “Are you ready?”

“Yeah,” Juuzou nodded. 

“There’s some very important stuff I want you to keep in mind,” Shinohara put down his tablet and took off his reading glasses. “You wanna go over it now? Or are you too busy with that game?”

“Now is fine buuuuut I have a question.”

“What’s that?”   
“Will you paint my nails?”

Shinohara raised a brow. “I…don’t know if I will be any good at that. I’ve never done it before.”

“But I want _you_ to do it.”

“Well I guess I can try.”

“Good!” Juuzou hopped up, tossed his phone into the couch, and bounced off to his bedroom. Shinohara watched him, a faint smile on his face. Juuzou’s physical prowess had never been a question, but after studying for the exam and now assisting Shinohara with the more tedious aspects of the job, Juuzou seemed to be turning into quite the competent investigator. 

Juuzou bounced back into the room with a small, zipped bag, from which he produced a small bottle of red nail polish, cotton balls, and a bottle of nail polish remover. He sat on the couch cross legged, and settled his hand on his knees. 

“Okay!” he declared, “I’m ready!”

Shinohara eyes the chipped red nail polish already on Juuzou’s nails and frowned. 

“Okay,” he muttered, screwing off the cap of the nail polish remover and grimacing at the smell of it. “Damn, that’s strong. Do I just…put it on the cotton ball?”

“Yep, then use it to clean off the old stuff,” Juuzou replied, practically bouncing up and down with anticipation. Shinohara wasn’t sure why he was so excited, but he complied, carefully soaking a cotton ball in the foul-smelling stuff and then wiping it gently across Juuzou’s nail, one at a time. It wasn’t exactly rocket science, but he assumed that the actual painting of Juuzou’s nails would be much more difficult, especially since they were very small nails. Next to Juuzou’s fine, pale hands, Shinohara’s hand looked huge and ungainly, but Juuzou didn’t seem to mind at all. In fact, he looked practically serene, his eyes slightly glassy, a small smile on his face. Shinohara could hear him humming softly to himself, could see him staring off in the distance, and he wondered what this was all about. He’d never seen Juuzou react like this to…well, anything. 

When he finished removing all of the nail polish, Juuzou’s nails were bright pink. “Is that color normal?” He asked, pointing to Juuzou’s fingers dubiously. 

“Yeah, just keep going,” Juuzou said dreamily. 

Shinohara complied. He unscrewed the nail polish and brought out the tiny brush, then ever so carefully, he drew the brush from the bottom of Juuzou’s nails to the top. He had managed to paint one neat stripe, though it started 3 millimeters or so from Juuzou’s cuticle. With a sigh, he tried again, and did better. Soon, he was finished with the first nail, and it wasn’t even terribly messy. 

_Success_.

Juuzou seemed satisfied that Shinohara could handle the task, or at least, Shinohara assumed he was satisfied when his eyes slipped closed, long lashes fluttering down, a soft smile curling at his lips. Shinohara painted each nail in turn, and though it was clear that they would need another coat to achieve Juuzou’s preferred opacity, they were coming along nicely. When Shinohara painted the last bit of the last nail, Juuzou murmured, “Blow on it.”

“Blow on it?” Shinohara asked. 

“Yeah, to make it dry faster. Then do it again.”

“Alright, little prince.”

Juuzou giggled and his eyes opened sleepily. “Why did you call me that?”

“Well, here you are, getting your nails painted just so. Kind of makes you seem like royalty.”

Juuzou shrugged, eyes slipping closed again. “Hmm. Just blow on it okay?”

Shinohara blew lightly across Juuzou’s red nails, and Juuzou let out a noise that was somewhere between a moan and a sigh. Shinohara raised a brow and blew across Juuzou’s nails again, watching him closely as he shivered involuntarily. It was clear that whatever this meant for Juuzou, it went well beyond the sum of its parts. Shinohara had the distinct feeling that he was being allowed into a sacred space, a precious ritual. He certainly didn’t want to compromise that, so he held his comments, blew across Juuzou’s nails lightly, and watched the twitches of his lips. 

When he was sure the polish was dry, he painted a second coat across each nail, then blew across them, this time unprompted. Once they were dry, Juuzou flopped back, kicked off his house slippers, and pushed his toes into Shinohara’s thigh. 

“Now do my toes,” he demanded, and Shinohara was happy to comply. He’d never been overly interested in feet—in fact, he’d never understood the appeal of them—but Juuzou’s soft, slender feet and well-formed toes were enough to make him rethink his stance. He felt more confident with this whole process now; removing the polish on Juuzou’s toes went easier than his fingers had, though he had to take careful care with the tiny nail of his smallest toes. Juuzou’s feet were more sensitive than his hands—a fact that became clear when his shivers grew more frequent and his moans grew louder. Shinohara was starting to feel vaguely warm, was starting to notice his pants growing tight. It was just too much, seeing Juuzou laid out on the couch, tendrils of white hair in a halo above his head, his freshly painted fingernails rubbing over his torso, his body shivering and shaking as Shinohara painted each toenail in turn. Shinohara finished the first coat and blew across his toe nails, and Juuzou’s back arched with the sensation, fingers digging into the couch cushions.

Shinohara brought his mouth closer, placing a kiss softly on the pad of Juuzou’s big toe.

“That feels strange,” Juuzou giggled, lift his head up to catch Shinohara’s gaze. 

“Does it?” Shinohara asked. 

“Yeah…isn’t it weird to kiss feet?”

“Lots of people kiss feet,” Shinohara shrugged. 

“Lots of people are weird,” Juuzou sighed. 

“Yeah,” Shinohara agreed. “But it feels nice, doesn’t it?”

“I think so,” Juuzou murmured. “I feel warm and nice all over, though. No one ever paints my nails anymore.”

“Anymore?” Shinohara asked. “Who used to paint them?”

“My momma…” Juuzou replied, closing his eyes and laying back. “She used to paint them every week. It was my favorite time.”

Shinohara wasn’t entirely sure how to respond to that, so he just smiled down at Juuzou and went back to painting. Finally, he said, “Well, I could paint them every week from now on, if you’d like.”

“I’d like.” Juuzou confirmed. 

***

“This is it,” Shinohara said, comparing the address on his phone to the building sitting before them. “Anteiku.”

“Mmmm, smells good,” Juuzou smiled, and smiled back before pushing through the door. 

An older man at the counter greeted them warmly, and asked them to sit anywhere they wanted, so Shinohara let Juuzou choose a table. Shinohara ordered an iced coffee, and Juuzou ordered a hot cocoa. A television in the corner blared a popular daytime talk show, and after a few minutes of idle chatter, Shinohara realized that the guest was none other than Ogura Hisashi, the so-called ‘ghoul specialist.’ People like Ogura made the lives of investigators that much harder; his expertise was a farce, and his information was only ever vaguely accurate. Half-truths were infinitely believable, and when people got misinformation about ghouls, it often led to trouble. 

“‘Ghoul expert,’” Shinohara scoffed. “Ogura Hisashi is just a ghoul freak who enjoys spreading rumors.” 

“A ghoul flake?” Juuzou asked; he’d been distracted by the program, and by stirring sugar and cream into his coffee. 

“No, he’s just…ghoul-obsessed. But due to his rumors, people’s perceptions of the average ghoul have gone soft. People think that they needn’t be concerned about ghouls, so they aren’t very careful. It causes all kinds of trouble.” 

Juuzou tilted his head and blinked. 

“But since the Binge Eater has a large appetite, I would say that it’s a young ghoul, maybe in its teens or twenties. And I think it’s female.”

“Why female?” Juuzou asked.

“Well, because all the victims were young, attractive, fit men. She was attracted to her prey by their physical appearances.”

“Maybe it’s a homosexual ghoul, then.” Juuzou shrugged. 

“Oh,” Shinohara swallowed. “I hadn’t thought of that, Juuzou.”

“But I’ll be 20 soon, and I’ve never seen a homosexual ghoul.” Juuzou frowned. 

“Anyway,” Shinohara pressed forward, “I want to tie the binge eater to the girl who died in the accident, if possible.” 

All of this talk about ghouls seemed to have made the employees nervous; the server was whispering to the older man, who appeared to be the manager. Shinohara made a mental note of their behavior. Just then, the bell above the door rang, and another young girl walked in. She seemed to be an employee, and she spoke quietly to the others. The first girl walked swiftly to the back, a frown on her face. Shinohara raised a brow to Juuzou, who wiggled his slight brows back. 

The girl who’d just shown up walked toward them, and Shinohara smiled at her. 

“Excuse me, miss, but I’d like another iced coffee.”

“And I’ll have another cocoa!” Juuzou grinned. “And a mixed sandwich set, too.”

“Of course,” she said with a nod. 

“Also, if you don’t mind,” Shinohara looked her straight in the eyes. “I’d like to ask you something.”

“Of course,” she said, but her eyes slid to the side.

“Wasn’t there a young man who was working here before name Kaneki Ken?”

“Yes,” she said, bringing her eyes back to Shinohara’s. Her expression was neutral, but Shinohara caught the way her jaw tightened around the response. “He was a university student who worked here for a bit.”

“That’s him,” Shinohara nodded. “He doesn’t come here now?”

“Yeah,” she replied, her eyes falling to the floor. “Not now. Why, is something wrong?”

“No,” Shinohara replied, “We’re just investigating a little.” 

With that he held up his badge so that she could read it. Her eyes widened. 

“Ghoul…investigators?” 

Shinohara smiled up at her and nodded. “Now, could you tell me when Kaneki began working here?

“Um…I think he started in October.”

“And when did he stop coming in?”

“He disappeared suddenly…it was December. We tied to contact him, but no one was able to reach him.”

December. Shinohara rolled the month around in his head. So he started working after his organ transplant, and stopped attending both work and school at the same time. Juuzou had seen him at the raid on Aogiri, which was after his disappearance…could he have…

Shinohara realized all at once that Juuzou was staring at the girl with a hard excitement in his eyes, as if he knew something, or sensed something about her that Shinohara had missed.

“Hm?” he asked the question with a single sound.

Juuzou’s lips quirked slightly as he asked the girl, “Are you sick?”

“What?” she asked, confused.

“Did you….throw something up?” Juuzou pressed her further. 

Shinohara tilted his head to the side. “Have…we met somewhere before?”

The girl stared at him, her face frozen in a mask of professional courtesy, but her eyes blinked slowly. 

“No?” she finally replied, and Shinohara felt something tighten in his gut. She knew something. Just as he opened his mouth to speak, the older man set down a plate of sandwiches and their drink refills with a gentle smile. 

“Kaneki was a good kid,” he said softly. “He was kind to everyone, and skilled with his hands. Have you contacted his university?”

“Yeah,” Shinohara nodded, eyeing the older man. 

“Well, I don’t know if I can help you find him,” the man went on, “But he seemed to be the recipient of an organ transplant. I guess he was involved in some sort of accident. He had to take his immunosuppressant drugs even during his work shifts. And his body was so broken from the incident that he could hardly eat any food.”

Shinohara listened, taking mental notes that he could write down later. Juuzou, meanwhile, had become completely engrossed in his sandwiches. 

“Did you notice anything else that seemed odd about him?” Shinohara asked. 

The older man hummed and rubbed his chin. 

“You know, now that you mention it, he did mention once that he wanted to go somewhere else quickly…I guess that’s to be expected for a young man of his age.” 

Shinohara didn’t believe a word of it…but he thought it best, for now, to leave this place. They’d gleaned some information, but he wasn’t sure how much it could be trusted. Additionally, it seemed that the old man and the young woman were protecting the boy in some way. Shinohara wasn’t one to jump to conclusions, but his gut was rarely wrong. This coffee shop would need to be reexamined. 

“I see,” he said with a small smile. 

“Well,” he stood, gathering up his jacket. “The coffee was delicious.”

“Thank you so much!” Juuzou chimed in with a cherubic smile. 

The old man smiled back at them both. 

“We’ll…come again.” 

He tried to let it sound like a statement, and not a threat. 

As they walked away, Shinohara muttered, “It seems like the bait was taken.”

“Bait? The sandwiches?” Juuzou asked, looking up at him. 

“No…about Kaneki Ken. That old man is definitely hiding something.” 

They walked side by side for awhile, king their way back to headquarters to report what they’d found. Eventually, Shinohara asked, “How did you know she’d thrown up?”

“I could smell it,” Juuzou replied, swinging his arms as he walked. 

“Do you think she’s a ghoul?” 

“Maybe…” Juuzou shrugged. “Do you?”

“Maybe…” Shinohara replied. “Juuzou, you’re very observant. I’d think you were a ghoul too, if I didn’t know better.”

Juuzou laughed aloud, and Shinohara smiled down at him. 

***

“Good work today, team,” Shinohara began, smiling at Amon, Akira, and Nagachika. “Juuzou, would you like to tell everyone what we found today?”

Juuzou nodded and went on a somewhat rambling explanation of everything they’d discovered and all that had happened at the coffee shop. Shinohara had instructed him not to mention seeing Kaneki at the Aogiri headquarters quite yet, and he dutifully kept that information to himself. 

“Good,” Shinohara nodded as Juuzou finished his reporting. “Now, Akira, would you like to share your findings?”

“Yes,” she stood and nodded at him. “Nagachika and I looked through the real estate holdings of Dr. Kanou, but there was another house bought under another name that Amon discovered. The house is too large for a single inhabitant and is located poorly for a summer home. Additionally, it has a very large basement. We believe that Kanou may be hiding in that property, where he can not be traced, and may be living underground, so that no one sees him. For this reason, we believe that the next important move is to investigate that property, but it could be quite dangerous.”

“Dangerous?” Shinohara asked. “You think that Kanou is not alone?”

“We can’t be too careful,” Amon chimed in. 

“Of course,” Shinohara nodded. “I’ll submit the paperwork for clearance. Do you think we’ll need backup?” 

“Yes, at least one unit,” Amon nodded.    
“Agreed. Let’s see who we can get.” 

Though the rest of the day was spent in preparations, Shinohara couldn’t shake the feeling that something…something was off. If he was right, if his suspicions were correct, than this boy, Kaneki…this human boy might be colluding with ghouls in some way. He wasn’t sure how to handle such a creature, or how he would be considered by the CCG. Was he a ghoul sympathizer? Had he forsaken his humanity willingly? The questions were endless, and Shinohara lacked any sort of answers. They could only press forward. 

***

The next few days passed in a haze of preparation. Approval for the operation was given, a backup squad was secured, and Nagachika was told several times that he was not allowed to attend, despite his protestations. Still, the growing pit of discomfort in Shinohara’s gut refused to be ignored; even alcohol wasn’t enough to coax it into submission. He wished that there was a way…some way that they could secure more information about the house, about Kanou, about what they might expect to find there. However, no matter how he approached it, it seemed that Kanou had successfully managed to disappear, and that they had no choice but to descend into the belly of the house itself. 

After nearly a week of preparations, the stage was set. They would be entering Kanou’s house and confronting whatever it was that they would find there the next day. With a heavy heart and a nervous belly, Shinohara rode the trains home with Juuzou, lost in the wash of ambient noise and the sea of commuters like himself. By the time they made it home, he’d still hardly spoken a word. He didn’t expect Juuzou to comment—the boy was incredibly observant on investigations, but never seemed to pay much mind to Shinohara’s moods. It was just as well…there was nothing to talk about, really, and talk wouldn’t ease his nerves. 

But as he sat on the couch watching television, Juuzou appeared wrapped up in a robe, still warm and damp from the shower, hair hanging in loose curls. He climbed into Shinohara’s lap and rubbed his nose against the stubble of Shinohara’s cheeks, which made Shinohara laugh softly. 

“What are you up to?” Shinohara asked. 

“You haven’t talked all night,” Juuzou said. “Anyway, I took a shower.”

Shinohara wasn’t sure how those things were connected, but he nodded. 

“Juuzou…” he said softly, twisting a bit of Juuzou’s damp hair around his fingers. 

“What?” Juuzou asked, leaning into the attention. 

“Tomorrow, when we go to the house…you should stay near to me…at least until we know what we’re facing.”

Juuzou looked at him, the translucent hairs of his brow catching the gold of the floor lamp. 

“Promise?” Shinohara asked, but Juuzou was settling into his lap, straddling it, opening his robe so that Shinohara could see the expanse of his porcelain skin. Shinohara’s mind skipped a beat, his fingers finding Juuzou’s nipple before he had time to process what he was doing. 

“Are you distracting me?” Shinohara asked, but Juuzou covered his mouth in kisses, started unbuckling his belt, unzipping his pants. “Are you getting out of answering me?”

“No, Mr. Shinohara,” Juuzou panted against his lips. “But if you end up in the hospital again, I want something to remember.”

Shinohara wasn’t sure if he believed him, but Juuzou’s fingers were soft and deft, and they’d developed, by this point, a working knowledge of one another’s bodies. Juuzou knew that if he nibbled at the edges of Shinohara’s ears, for example, that it wouldn’t be long before Shinohara grew hard. And he knew that in general, Shinohara was helpless to his advances. And normally, that wasn’t a problem, but tonight, Shinohara really was worried about his propensity for wandering, and what would happen at Kanou’s house if he followed that pattern. 

Then again, even if he got Juuzou to promise not to wander, there was no reason to assume that Juuzou would comply when the time came. He supposed there was no harm in indulging themselves tonight…even if a part of him wished that whatever it was that they were cultivating was enough to make Juuzou think twice before putting himself in life or death situations unnecessarily. Being an investigator was an exercise in facing one’s mortality, and none of them could avoid mortal danger. But that didn’t mean that they should go looking for it, either. He didn’t feel that it was too much to ask. 

He started to open his mouth again, but Juuzou covered it in kisses, reached down into his pants, let his fingers wrap around Shinohara’s cock, which was already mostly hard. Juuzou would do what he would do, and Shinohara was relatively powerless to prevent it. If nothing else, the boy had proven at least that much—was proving it now, as a matter of fact. Shinohara groaned, picked Juuzou up in his arms, and carried him to the bedroom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, and thank you for reading. I am deeply sorry about the long wait. I can't be sure when the next chapter will be out (since I am going back to school in a week for so) but I will do my best to get it out sooner rather than later! 
> 
> I hope that everyone enjoyed!


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